


Stitches

by luckyvanilla



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV), The Walking Dead Series - Robert Kirkman & Jay Bonansinga
Genre: Accidental Cuddling, Aftermath of Torture, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Gore, Canonical Character Death, Daryl Dixon Smut, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Torture, Minor Character Death, Post-Apocalypse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Daryl Dixon, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Torture, Treason
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:08:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 24
Words: 75,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23393779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luckyvanilla/pseuds/luckyvanilla
Summary: Daryl gestured at her to look at him. Kat realized he wanted to check the stitches he gave her and turned her head for him to see ‘Makes you hotter’ he stated drily but on an amused tone.Kat’s eyes went wide for a second before she started laughing, turning to face the fire again ‘Told you’
Relationships: Connie/Daryl Dixon, Daryl Dixon/Original Female Character(s), Maggie Greene/Glenn Rhee, Negan (Walking Dead)/Original Female Character(s), Rick Grimes/Michonne
Comments: 42
Kudos: 87





	1. Survivor

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone, thanks for giving this story a shot as you're already here! Everything is welcomed especially criticism, considering this is my first pusblished work!  
> One thing to keep in mind, English is not my first language, so you'll most likely stumble upon cringy phrases or tenses used awfully wrong, but I promise I'll get better :)  
> Enjoy!

First shot, one down. Second shot, another one down. The rest of them started to move towards her again, drawing them away from the CDC building. Afetr the small explosion broke from the building and the windows broke to pieces, people started running desperately outside. She saw the group coming out just a few seconds before and her body acted on its own, before her mind would have told it otherwise. She had to draw most of the walkers away so they could get out and hopefully get to some vehicles. She let go of the rifle, the strap already on her shoulder, letting it rest on her right side. She wiped the sweat away with the back of her gloved hand, thinking it was over, just in time to see an old man and a blonde woman leaping away from the CDC building, with two walkers on their tail. Revving the engine of her motorbike, she went straight for the two survivors, machete in her right hand.

‘Duck!’ she yelled as she swung the machete straight through the undeads’ skulls one after the other, turning in a U back to the road, but not fast enough. The second explosion was bigger, throwing the bike stumbling on its side, her body drifting painfully on the concrete.

As the ringing in her ears was deafening her, she tried to get up, first on all fours, but dropping back on her side – her hip was dislocated ‘Блин’ she swore, eyes wide shut. She felt someone’s hands on her left arm, trying to lift her up. Opening her eyes, she saw the old man from seconds again, offering her support, before two other men came out of the parked RV next to her, hoisting her up by her sides. 

All their words were muffled, the ringing in her ears slowly fading way. She waved her left hand in front of her face and jerked both arms away from the two men, falling back to her knees.

‘Look we’re trying to help’ the Asian looking guy cried out.

‘It’s dislocated’ she breathed through the pain. She bent her knees while her heels touched, pressing her right knee down and a pop was audible just before she grunted in pain. It was a matter of seconds, but it felt like an eternity. She grabbed the Asian guy’s arm and let him help her back on her feet. 

‘All I want to say is thank you and as much as I’d like to do it properly, we have to go’ the old man yelled. She looked around, the undead were herding in their way, two men of the group and the blonde woman barely keeping them at bay.

‘Don’t mention it’ she waved her hand in the old man’s direction, brows furrowed and a scowl on her face, limping back to her bike, trying to lift it up in its right position. The other man who helped her get up earlier, wearing some kind of uniform, yelled after her to follow them for a bit.

‘Miss, wait! Follow our cars a bit, just until we get to a safe place, okay?’ he yelled again before jumping back in the RV, every car scattering around in a matter of seconds. 

Luckily, her bike was still in one piece and she took off as soon as the engine came back to life, following the group of vehicles down the highway.

*

Her hip was shooting jolts of incredible pain up and down her spine, even if it was popped back into its place. The position on her bike was taking its toll and she knew she had to stop soon somewhere, otherwise she’ll lose control and crash.

Luckily, she saw the group in front of her slowing down towards a shaded shelter on the highway. She swerved to the right and slowed down gradually, trying to maintain her composure, but it was too late – seconds before the bike would have fallen on its side, she jumped off of it, letting go and collapsing on the ground. She laid on her back a few minutes, before the old man approached her again, offering his hand to help her move. She took it and hoisted herself back up, hopping towards their cars while leaning on the man.

The group was slowly emerging from their vehicles, looking in her way. The uniform man and another one, were both visibly tensed while watching her come in their direction. Soon, she realized all their eyes were avoiding or frozen on one thing – the rifle on her right shoulder. The civilized way to handle this would be to leave it on the ground, but this was not a civilized world anymore. She knew better, previous encounters thought her that.

One of the men moved aside, briefly pointed to the back of an abandoned truck, while he kept his other hand tensed on a crossbow. The old man helped her sit down on the back of the truck, taking her arm gently off of his shoulders. She huffed in pain and leaned on her good side, head slightly leaned back, looking at the group. She noticed that not everyone was outside, she saw the kids earlier when she saved them, but now they were nowhere to be seen – they didn’t trust her. These people were warry of her, fair enough.

As no one seemed to have the initiative to start up the conversation, the old man offered her his hand ‘I’m Dale’ he spoke softly ‘Thank you’ was all he said and she offered her right hand, visibly caught by surprise at presenting herself, thing that didn’t get away unnoticed.

‘Kat’ she said after a few seconds of hesitation. She firmly shook Dale’s hand ‘And as I said before, don’t mention it’ Kat withdrew her hand and placed it on her lap.

‘Rick Grimes, sheriff’s deputy’ the uniformed man spoke up, breaking the silence ‘This is Shane Walsh’ he pointed at the huge man standing next to him. Something about the way he looked at her, triggered something in her, a feeling she knew very well – something was off about this guy.

‘Daryl’ the man with the crossbow nodded, suspicion never leaving his face.

‘T-Dog’ the bulky black man next to Dale spoke up, leaning on the side of the truck ‘And the one who helped you earlier is Glenn’ T-Dog pointed to the RV just as the Asian guy came out, looking a bit disoriented.

‘The woman?’ Kat asked locking eyes with Rick ‘Is she safe?’

Rick nodded, briefly looking at the RV behind him. He crossed his arms and turned back to face her. Just before he apparently made up his mind, Kat took the strap off her shoulder and placed the rifle next to her in the back of the truck, earning a few nasty looks. Shane already had his shotgun in place, pointed at her.

‘I’m hurt, but armed. I understand your concerns’ she spoke, green eyes still on Rick. He nodded and looked at Shane, disapprovingly.

‘So, Kat’ Shane spoke in a mocking tone ‘what’s your story?’

She tried to pinpoint exactly what it was, but every thought led her to one thing – he was a dangerous man. 

‘When shit went down, I – ‘ Kat sighed, visibly shaken ‘ – just rolled with it’ she trailed off and asked if she could have a smoke. Daryl threw her a cigarette and she lit it with shaky hands.

‘Did you have a group?’ Rick asked on a suspicious tone. Kat locked her eyes with Rick, pain lacing her golden eyes. 

She shook her head, fully knowing how they will look at her ‘Dead. Ever since, I was on my own’

‘You’ve been alone?’ Glenn asked surprised ‘How did you manage on your own?’ he asked the question everyone was thinking. Before she could answer, Dale noticed the chain around her neck.

‘You’re a vet?’ he asked a bit surprised. 

Kat slightly nodded ‘You could say that’ fingers quick on her dogtag, hiding it away under her tanktop. ‘It was a small group of civilians from my neighborhood. I tried to help them in the beginning. Wife and husband. Two sweet kids. And a couple that lived next door. Food was running thin. I was the only one able to make runs around the neighborhood, the wife was very ill, the kids were too young, the husband didn’t want to leave their side. And the other couple, addicts but good people when sober. Couldn’t trust them on a run though’ Kat took another drag and flicked the cigarette on the concrete ‘I was coming home after a much needed run. While I was out there – ‘ she smiled bitterly, chewing unconsciously on the inside of her cheek ‘ – the wife died’ she looked up at the men in front of her and she sighed heavily ‘She turned. Her kids were sleeping next to her’ 

‘I’m sorry’ Rick broke the silence, rubbing his chin absentmindedly.

‘I took the husband’s bike when I left’ she pointed at the ground where her bike was still on its side. ‘Took some pretty rough hits especially today, I hope it’s still good’ she chuckled a bit.

Shane was staring at Rick, annoyance on his face. He patted Rick on the shoulder and gestured to him to go talk privately. Daryl took the rifle from the truck and placed it on his shoulder, giving her a silent warning, after which he went and raised the bike in its place.

‘Hey’ Kat spoke in his direction, but Daryl didn’t hear her. She turned to Dale after getting ignored ‘There’s a bag on my bike. It has some pain medicine. Can you bring it to me, please?’ she spoke weakly, pain still radiating from her hip. Dale nodded and went to fetch the pills.

Rick came back, stopping in front of Kat, hands on his hips ‘Kat’ she looked up at him while drinking some water to ease the pill down her throat ‘You’re welcome to join us if you want to’ Rick nodded and looked at the rest of the men outside. He shook her hand and spoke to everyone this time ‘We’ll camp here tonight. It’s getting late and Kat’s injured, she can’t ride in her current condition’  
The men nodded, Dale smiling at her with a grateful look on his face. He patted her on the leg twice and went to the RV. Rick followed him and soon enough, two women came out of the vehicle along with two kids. After talking briefly to Rick, they were making their way towards the truck.

‘I’m Lori’ the brunette offered her hand, while the small boy was clinging to her side. Kat shook her hand and smiled weakly ‘This is Carl’ Lori rubbed her kid’s back smiling ‘And these are Carol and Sophia’

‘Kat’ she introduced herself. She felt close to passing out soon, but she couldn’t afford that. Sure, they seemed like nice people, but they were a group of nine and she was alone. What if while she rests, they’ll steal her stuff and leave her to die? 

As if he could hear her thoughts, Glenn placed a hand on her shoulder while passing by back to the RV, smiling ‘It’s okay, you need to rest a bit, right?’ Kat nodded after a few seconds. She checked the injured side of her body and only then noticed the nasty wounds from earlier. Her hip was bleeding, a big patch of skin was left on the concrete next to the CDC building. 

Carol noticed her struggling to patch herself up and placed a hand on her leg, smiling sheepishly ‘Let me help’ 

She laid down in the truck, feet dangling on the edge still, while Carol patched her up. Kat tried to stay awake as much as she could, but the fatigue was stronger than her will. She drifted off in the back of the truck, looking at the branches swayed by the wind.

*

When she woke up, it was already dark outside and she was still in the back of the truck. She tried to move, the pain was slowly fading away, but her body felt damn sore. She noticed she was covered with a blanket and she had a bag under her head. They were good people, she smiled to herself. It might actually work.

Kat pushed herself in a sitting position, putting aside the blanket, searching for a bottle of water.

‘Hey’ Daryl was on top of the RV, smoking a cigarette ‘Ya okay?’

Kat nodded, getting off the truck. ‘Were you the one to pamper me?’ Kat pointed at the blanket before getting closer to the RV. Daryl scoffed but didn’t say anything. She wondered back around the truck and her bike for a few minutes. Her rifle was on her bike now. She took it and placed it on her shoulder.

Kat went back to the RV and tried to get on top of it, but failed miserably due to her hip. Noticing her struggling to get on the vehicle, Daryl offers his hand while flicking the cigarette butt in the bushes. She took it and he hoisted her up next to him. Kat took a seat in the other chair and placed her rifle in her lap. Daryl threw the cigarette pack at her and held his water bottle out.

‘T was the kids’ he mumbled while looking in the distance for walkers. Kat smiled to herself, lighting up a cigarette after she drank half a bottle of water.

‘Sorry, and thanks’ she said, giving him back the pack of smokes and the half empty bottle. Daryl looked at the bottle and threw it back in her lap. 

Kat nodded in his direction, patting the riffle on her lap. She checked it twice, as she always did, a thing that crept into her being since a young age. Before she was able to drift into memories, Kat noticed Daryl staring at her and he might have done it for a while now.

‘What?’ she cocked an eyebrow at him.

‘Nothin’ he trailed off but continued after a few seconds ‘yer hair’

Kat gave a knowing nod as soon as the words left his lips. She was used to it, but she kept forgetting that people would find it rather weird. She was wearing her hair in a long messy braid, but the weird part was not that, it was the color.

‘I started graying very young. Took on my mother’s side I guess’ Kat started smoothing out rebel hairs that came out of her braid, bringing it on her right side. The braid rested easily on top of her rifle, looping around two or three times. ‘The color just faded away with time. At 20 I had a head full of grey hair already’ she shrugged putting out the cigarette on the sole of her boots.  
Daryl nodded ‘doesn’t look half bad’ he chewed his inner bottom lip. Kat smiled, he was joking with her, that was a good sign ‘Kat’ Daryl continued on a more serious tone ‘what’s with the Russian stuff?’ he pointed to her bike, where she had her supply bags.

‘You went through my stuff?’ Kat whispered, any smile fading away quickly from her lips, being replaced with a cold stare. Daryl squinted at her, saying nothing, muscles tensing in his arm that was holding the crossbow. Kat relaxed back in the chair and sighed deeply.

‘Truth would do you good’ Daryl pried a bit more, but he was met by the same cold stare from seconds ago.

‘I didn’t lie earlier’ Kat spoke with a heavy accent, kissing the charade goodbye. She noticed the man nodding, but didn’t ask anything more.

*

The sky was slowly lighting up, marking the start of the new day which meant they’ll be on the road in a matter of hours at most. Kat hopped off the RV, pain shooting up her side as soon as her boots touched the ground, leaving Daryl to continue his watch.

Limping to her bike, she placed the rifle on the handle grip, putting her supply bags back in place as good as she could, considering the falls it took the other day. She checked the food bag which was still full, however there were signs of someone rummaging through it. Kat took out two protein bars and facing the RV again, she threw one in Daryl’s direction, landing on the roof next to him with a loud thud. He gave a head nod in her way, just as the RV door opened and Dale came out, placing his hat on his head.

‘Morning’ he said in a cheerful tone, smiling towards Kat. Soon enough, the others came out of their cars, slowly stretching and yawning, trying to get ready for the road.

She nodded back, chewing on the tasteless bar quietly. If Daryl figured that there was something fishy about her, the others would be aware soon enough too. She took another bite and spaced out, thinking about her choices from the other day. She could have easily not follow them, she could have easily tell them the truth when they asked, however she did not lie, she only kept part of the truth from them, which could arguably be as bad as lying. But in her situation, it would be bad either way. Kat woke up from her daydreaming when she felt someone staring at her. She threw a side stare towards the group just to find Shane staring back in his eternal annoyed state of mind. Kat brushed it off quickly, crumpling the packaging in her right fist before throwing to the side and leaned against her bike. Littering was the last thing on her mind these days. 

Daryl jumped off the RV, still chewing on the protein bar, eyebrows furrowed and went for the truck. Kat watched as he signed T-Dog to help him check if the tank was still full, so they could siphon out the gas. 

‘D’ya wanna ride in the car?’ Soon enough they realized the tank was empty and Daryl shouted at Kat, pushing his bike towards her. Kat shook her head and straddled her own bike, while placing the rifle strap around her neck.

Rick was talking to Shane a few feet away and as soon as everyone seemed ready to hit to road, he drew everyone’s attention to him ‘So we’re heading to Fort Benning, we already lost a day’s worth of road’ Kat could feel a few stares directed at her, as her stunt from the other day was to be blamed for sure, but at least they had their group intact thanks to her. ‘You good riding from here on?’ Rick asked her, gesturing at her hip.

Kat nodded and placed her hands on the bike’s handles, making her point. ‘But Fort Benning?’ she asked a bit taken aback. Rick said something about hear-say that Fort Benning was still standing. Kat shrugged it off and as soon as everybody was in their vehicles, she revved the engine, following Daryl back on the highway, the RV and the other car on their tail.

She sped up a bit, just enough to match Daryl’s own speed and they both rode next to each other for a while, the others keeping a steady speed just behind them. The group went like that for a while until they were forced to stop. The highway in front of them was blocked with abandoned cars, a sore reminder of what the world was looking now.

Kat stopped in front of the RV and watched as Daryl went forward to check if there was any way through. They both could easily ride past the abandoned cars, but the RV and the car were the main problem. After a few minutes, Daryl came back, stopping next to the RV.

‘Do you see a way through?’ Dale asked from the back of the wheel and Daryl nodded, throwing his head back to follow him.

As Daryl made his way back, Kat went after him, leading the way with the other vehicles following. All the abandoned cars were giving off a horrible vibe that pushed Kat on edge. Her knuckles turned white while gripping the handles, the sight was hard to swallow. The way these cars were chaotically left behind was more than unnerving, hundreds of cars with their doors opened, others crashed into each other. Imagining what must’ve happened here, all the scared people, all the chaos that the end of the world brought, it was creeping up on her and she felt her chest tighten and her stomach drop. She was startled by something loud behind her and stopped to check on the RV. Smoke was coming from the radiator and Dale soon enough came out of the RV, slamming the door open.

‘I’ve said it, didn’t I say it? A thousand times. Dead in the water’ the old man mumbled while watching the smoke coming out of the radiator.

Everyone got out to see what the problem was, while Kat was already off her bike and rummaging through a random abandoned car next to her, only to see Daryl follow her example. The group was ready to scavenge the other cars for food, water, supplies, anything that was worth taking, as Dale was trying to fix the hose. 

Kat was head in, butt out of a car trying to take out an untouched pack of water bottles, as she was met with Shane’s gaze on the other side of the car. An armed Shane, as if simple Shane was not scary enough. She got startled and hit her head against the roof of the car, cursing slowly, metal clinking filling the small car, as her dog tags got out of her tank top. Shane didn’t miss the look on her face when she stared at him frozen, pack in both her hands. Kat dropped the bottles back on the backseat of the car, trying to hide away the necklace, but Shane gripped it before she could do it, yanking it away and leaving an open cut on the nape of her neck. She pushed herself out of the car and circled back to Shane, only to be met by a shotgun pointed at her, while he was trying to read the dog tags at the same time.

‘Give it back’ Kat tried to contain her rage, but her voice came out shaken and loud, enough to draw the attention of most of the group to them. 

Shane wasn’t having it, keeping his shotgun pointed towards her, while he furrowed at the piece of metal and staring back at Kat briefly. ‘Rick!’ he yelled for the other man, gun not faltering for even a second. Rick rushed to them in a matter of seconds, while the rest of the group was scattered around, frozen while doing various things. Carol was holding a piece of clothing, shocked at the gun pointed at Kat, while Daryl had his crossbow in place, but aimed at nothing in particular.

‘These aren’t American’ Shane spat in her direction, while shoving the dog tags towards Rick. The other man took the metal piece and inspected it for a few seconds, suspicion in his eyes while moving his gaze towards Kat’s tall frame. 

She held both her hands up, anger still fueling her current state of mind, but she didn’t really fancy being shot. Kat threw a stare in Daryl’s way only to be met by the same suspicious gaze that Rick was treating her with.

‘Care to explain?’ Rick asked her while holding the dog tags dangling in her face.

‘Care to not keep me at gunpoint?’ Kat shot back, scowling at Shane. 

Rick didn’t miss the heavy accent that Kat laced her words with, American one dropped. He placed his right hand on Shane’s shotgun, pushing it towards the ground, while dangling the dog tags until they made the clinking sound suggestively. Kat sighed, dropping back her arms around her body and absentmindedly holding onto the strap of the rifle. She licked her dry lips, trying to find the right words to explain what was happening, in a way so that she wouldn’t end up shot by Shane.

‘Look, I-‘ but Kat didn’t have a chance to start explaining, as Shane closed the small distance between them and tackled her to the ground, her back slamming painfully against the concrete, the air leaving her lungs. She tried to get a good grip on his shirt to push him off of her, but the next thing she knew, dark spots formed in the back of her eyes and she felt her body being hoisted up and her head slam back against the concrete. The fucker actually punched me. Was all she was able to think, before she felt a hand on her mouth, slamming it shut. As she opened her eyes, she saw Shane crouched next to the car and noticed it was Rick’s hand silencing her. Trying to get up, she didn’t have to follow their gaze to understand why everyone was dead in their spots – the sound coming from behind the RV was enough. 

Walkers. Kat gestured to Rick to go under the car next to them, as Shane disappeared while she focused on the other man. She tried to crawl under another car as silent as she could, before she stopped looking at a terrified Sophia. The girl was frozen like a deer in the headlights, unable to move. She got up and lunged at the girl, pushing her under the closest car, Kat herself rolling on the concrete straight under an abandoned RV a few feet away. She could see Carol and Lori under the car next to Sophia, making shushing signs towards the frightened girl.  
Kat tried to even her breath and get rid of the adrenaline rushing through her body from Shane’s stupid assault, but she was shaking uncontrollably. The walkers were getting closer and as the seconds passed, she realized their specific growl was getting louder, this had to be a big ass group. Kat knew she was able to stay still until they are gone but she wasn’t sure about Sophia. The girl was crying and as hard as she tried, she couldn’t be silent. 

A few agonizing minutes later, the danger seemed to have passed, only a couple of stray walkers still around. Sophia was getting even more scared though and as many shushing gestures Kat tried to make in her way, the girl cried after her mother and tried to get out from under the car, drawing the stray walkers to the her. 

‘Бля-‘ Kat swore and rolled out from under the RV, hands searching her hunting knives ‘Иди сюда, придурки!’ she whisper yelled at the walkers, while running in their direction.

Sophia panicked and left the safe spot, running towards the end of the road with five walkers behind her. Kat jumped in front of the walkers, and pushed her knife through one of the walkers skull, placing its lifeless body against a nearby car trying to keep the noise at a minimum level. She tried to distract the other walkers away from Spohia, but two of them were already heading in the girl’s direction. She saw Rick jump after Sophia after a few seconds, disappearing into the woods following the girl and the walkers that got away. Kat redirected her attention to the undead coming her way, rolling on a car’s hood to jump on the other side, drawing them in the middle of the highway. With a single blow, she slashed open another walker’s head, just in time to see the other one falling to the ground, with an arrow pointing out of its left eye.

Kat felt the adrenaline fading away and tried to get a hold of a car door before her legs gave out. She failed, but instead of going down, she felt herself leaning against someone else’s side. Daryl had an arm around her back, helping her on her feet towards the nearest car. She heard Carol’s desperate pleas somewhere in the distance, but couldn’t focus on it. Her surroundings kept making her dizzy and she was almost sure that Shane gave her a concussion. Rage filled her body again and she pushed Daryl aside, dragging her feet forward towards Shane. Kat swung her fist right in his left jaw, sending him stumbling a few feet away from her, grabbing his shirt and pushing him on the hood of an abandoned car. She tried to punch him again, but Daryl caught her arm midair and pushed her away. 

‘Fuckin’ stop it’ he growled while dragging her away from Shane, making her look at Carol who was watching the woods mortified, tears down her cheeks and mouth wide open, but no sound coming out. Lori was trying to calm her down, whispering assuring things and holding her.

Kat jerked her arm away from Daryl’s hold and scowled at him before hitting a tire in frustration. She placed her arms on the hood of the car and tried to calm herself down. She yanked open the door and threw herself in the passenger seat, only to be met by the small mirror on the sun visor. Shane did a number on her, Kat watched as her braid was soaked with blood at the base of her skull. The nape of her neck had dry blood where the necklace tore into her skin. She brushed it off quickly, touching her cheekbone with her fingertips before flinching in pain. Her right cheek was cut open from Shane’s punch and it was swelling and oozing fresh blood still, while the purple starting to form around the wound was spreading to her right eye.

Moments later, Rick came out of the woods, running back to the group with a confused look on his face.

‘She’s not back?’ he asked shocked, looking at the group. Carol started crying again and Lori held her tighter. Poor woman was a mess. 

Kat got out of the car, pushing past Shane without looking in his direction, back to the place where he held her at gunpoint, a few feet away from him. She retrieved her rifle off the ground and noticed the dog tags laying next to it. Kat bit the inside of her cheek in frustration, picking it up and going past Shane again, this time looking right in his eyes, while fuming silently. Before anyone could say anything, Kat jumped over the metal fence towards the woods, strolling angrily between the bushes. Rick, Daryl and Glenn followed soon, with Shane growling in frustration but going after them as well. 

*

‘Ya sure this ‘s the spot?’ Daryl asked, knee deep in the creek. 

‘I left her right here’ Rick gestured at the hallow space, desperation clear in his voice ‘I drew the walkers away in that direction up the creek’ the man said, pointing down the body of water.

Kat was trying to find any fresh tracks on the ground, tuning out the conversation and even more, trying to ignore the man who punched her in the face minutes before. She glanced at him from where she stood, noticing his cheek started to swell. Kat clenched her jaw in frustration, and focused on the forest floor again. 

‘Hey, short round, why don't ya step off to one side?’ Daryl’s voice drew her back from her head space ‘Ya're mucking up the trail’ he spoke again to Glenn, poor guy wasn’t even aware of what he was doing. 

‘Daryl’ Kat called out to him, while following a small set of footprints ‘she went this way’ Kat turned to look at the four men, cocking her head down at the trail. She let go of her rifle and it fell back on her right side, strap secured on her shoulder. 

Glenn was the first to reach her, the others following him. He looked absolutely clueless while trying to see what she tracked down, but directed his gaze to her face and the scowl he made, forced a chuckle out of Kat.

‘Ain’t such a pretty face, I know’ she laughed drily ‘Shane took care of it’ Kat stared at the man standing next to Rick. The latter threw a hand in the air, trying to dissipate the tension, while Daryl gave her a quick look and followed the tracks she had found. 

‘Not the time, or place for that’ Rick spat and started walking in the same direction as Daryl. Kat followed quietly, leaving Shane and Glenn behind.

They followed the tracks for a while, until Daryl pointed out the drastic change of the trails. Something scared her off to make her run away like that. Walkers. Kat was frantically trying to keep going, until she felt a hand on her shoulder. Rick stopped her and turned to face the other men.

‘Better if you two and Glenn get back up to the highway. People are gonna start panicking’ Rick tried to make sense and smooth out the current situation ‘Let them know we're on her trail doing everything we can. But most of all, keep everybody calm’ he continued, turning back to face Kat ‘And you, make sure you get cleaned up’ he pointed to the blood still oozing from where her cheek was cut ‘We’ll settle everything else when we’re done here’

‘I'll keep 'em busy scavenging cars. Think up a few other chores. I'll keep 'em occupied’ Shane took the initiative and started walking towards the highway, Glenn following him shortly after.

Kat lingered a bit, unsure if that was the best idea ‘Rick, if he tries something like that again’ she stopped, raising her arms in defeat looking at both men.

‘We’ll settle everything else when we’re done here’ Rick repeated himself and nodded in her direction. Kat sighed and went back to the highway, following Shane and Glenn.

She didn’t want to abandon the search, but she knew Rick was right for now. She had to take care of herself first. Kat jumped back on the highway, ignoring Shane’s helping hand as if it was mocking her and went straight to her bike, taking one of her supply bags and went back to the car Daryl pushed her against before, to tend to her wounds. 

Kat started cleaning the wound on her neck first, it was the shallowest and easies to handle. She felt the dog tags heavier than usual, she should have left them behind when it all started. She knew that at some point, those pieces of metal would cause something similar to this. But at the same time, she never thought she’ll use her real name to introduce herself either.

Trying to wipe away the dry blood off her cheek, Kat flinched at the pain her own touch made her feel. The wound where the skin broke went from her cheek to her temple, it was big, open and still bleeding. If she didn’t tend to it soon enough, it will surely become infected. 

Kat pushed the chair back and leaned against it, eyes wide shut and started pouring disinfectant directly on the wound. The pain was horrible, but she went through worse. She must’ve started growling, the sting in her cheek spreading to her ear and down her neck. She wiped her right eye with a cloth and tried to open her eyes, only to be met by the blonde woman’s gaze. The woman took the cloth from her hand and wiped away the blood that was still flowing from Kat’s cheek.

‘Andrea’ the blonde said in a flat tone. Kat nodded and took out of her bag a pack of band-aids. Andrea scoffed and took a couple out of the crumbled carton box ‘this is not enough’ she stated but still tore the paper off of it ‘you need stitches’ she continued, awkwardly placing the first one sideways from Kats temple down her hairline.

‘I assume no one knows how to stitch someone up’ Kat said in a mocking tone. Andrea shook her head and placed a second band-aid, but the wound was still bleeding. Kat sat straight up on the car seat looking in the small mirror ‘This is pointless’ she continued, ripping the band-aids off, pondering if she would be able to stitch herself up. ‘Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate it’ Kat stuffed everything back in her bag and stepped outside of the car, next to Andrea. Kat had basic knowledge about tending to such wounds, but she couldn’t do it on her own face without messing it up.

‘I figured that much. As I said, you need stitches’ Andrea trailed off, going to help the others move the rest of the cars out of the way. Kat threw her bag back on the bike and went after her.


	2. Fishing Line

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the first chapters, I'll stick to the TWD script as much as I can, diving in details to smooth out Kat's character into the story, as most of it will revolve around the original story. Of course we'll take a trip (or a dozen) down the smut lane at some point, but until then it's all about the details :)

It was already sunset when Daryl and Rick came out of the woods. No sign of Sophia, however. 

‘Her trail went cold. We'll pick it up again at first light’ Rick said as they approached the group, avoiding Carol’s teary gaze. 

‘You can't leave my daughter out there on her own to spend the night alone in the woods’ the woman cried out.

‘Out in the dark's no good. We'd just be trippin’ over ourselves. More people get lost’ Daryl tried to make sense, but it didn’t help.

‘But she's twelve! She can't be out there on her own! You didn't find anything?’ Carol pleaded again.

Kat was keeping her distance from the group, as she did all day after she came back from the woods. The situation was bad as it was already, pointless extra tension would break everybody if Shane would have snapped at her again.

‘How can you know that?’ Andrea asked, voice already shaky. 

After a short pause, Daryl broke the silence ‘We cut the son of a bitch open, made sure’

Carol broke down once again and Lori took her and Carl back to the RV, trying to calm her down. Kat watched as Rick trailed off down the highway between the abandoned cars. The man was feeling powerless for sure, everyone was feeling the same. She went back to her bike and fished out a pack of cigarettes from her bag. Lighting it up, she noticed Shane gesturing her to come. Kat took the rifle off her shoulder and placed it on the bike, while keeping Shane’s gaze. She was ready to explain herself and leaving back her rifle was supposed to make them understand she was in full peace mode.  
Kat leaned against the closest car, closing in to the group of men, as Rick and Glenn joined before her. Daryl was trying to light up a fire next to them to keep them warm for a bit, while Andrea passed water bottles around before going back to the RV joining the women inside. Dale was keeping watch already, but he was close enough to hear the conversation. 

As the wood started to catch fire, Carl came out, running to Rick’s side. Kat threw the cigarette butt into the fire and looked at Rick, her fingers clutched around her dog tags. She took the chain off her neck and held her arm out towards Rick, to take the necklace.

‘It’s written in russian’ Kat spoke softly, glancing shortly in Daryl’s direction ‘My name is Katerina Romanovich’ Rick took it to inspect it again, but the strange letters didn’t tell him anything. Daryl gestured to Rick to give him the pieces of metal. After a short while, he nodded.

‘Don’t know more than that, but it sounds ‘bout right’ he mumbled and lit up a cigarette. Daryl kept onto the necklace, not giving it back to Rick.

‘I served in the Russian military a while back. A few years after, I became an agent for the Russian security agency, until shit went down’ 

‘Former KGB?’ Dale asked without looking at the group, focusing in the distance, binoculars glued to his eyes.

Kat nodded, shifting her weight from one leg to another, watching as the expressions around her turned from curious to surprised or just frozen.

‘What’s that?’ Carl chimed in, looking at his father, curiosity in his eyes.

‘She a fuckin’ spy’ Daryl flicked the cigarette into the fire and looked at her, biting the inside of his lower lip.

‘A sleeper agent’ Kat corrected him in a defeated voice ‘I was placed in different countries, under different identities. I was deployed to Georgia 7 years ago under the identity of Hellen Truman, an electrical engineer’

Shane chuckled and looked at Rick, visibly irritated ‘And you still think it’s a good idea to keep her around our group? Around Carl and Lori?’ the man yelled and crossed his arms on his chest. Kat kept silent and bit her bottom lip, while gazing into the fire. 

‘This is the first time in years that I introduced myself with my real name’ Kat sat straight, arms around her torso, bracing herself ‘Do you think I am such a threat to America right now?’ she continued, closing in on Shane ‘This is the end of the world as we know it’ Kat whispered in an incredulous tone ‘Just execute me right now if you think my one true purpose is espionage’ she threw her arms up in defeat ‘Shoot me’

Shane didn’t know how to react. He scratched his head and started pacing around.

‘She has a point’ Rick broke the silence ‘She’s trained in combat and already knows how to use a gun. She has basic surviving skills. She knows how to track’ he continued after a short pause.

‘She did save me and Andrea while putting herself in danger’ Dale added while looking down at the group. Kat smiled in his way.

‘And killed some of the walkers that were after Sophia’ Carl completed in a small voice. Rick rubbed his back, remembering he was still around and told him to go back to his mother.

‘If you want me gone, I’ll leave first thing in the morning’ Kat concluded, but went and sat by the fire, joining Daryl.

‘We can vote’ Dale picked up the conversation ‘but I think we all know what the majority is already thinking’

‘She stayin’ Daryl poked at the fire, not making eye contact with anyone in particular. 

Rick nodded, aware of the only person who was against this. He was skeptical himself, but a person like Kat would be a great addition to their group, especially in the current conditions.

‘Kat’s staying, it’s settled’ Rick concluded, and left the rest of the group around the fire for a few minutes, before most of them left to rest.

Dale took the first watch already, and she had time to rest for a while, but sleep was the last thing on her mind. She followed Daryl’s example and started poking at the fire absentmindedly. A clinking sound brought her back from zoning out and saw Daryl’s hand holding the dog tags in her direction. She took the necklace from him and placed it back in its place around her neck.

‘Thanks’ she whispered loud enough so he could hear. Daryl didn’t say anything and got up, walking towards his bike. A few seconds later, a bottle of pills landed on her lap ‘Antibiotics?’ 

‘My brother’s’ he mumbled while sitting back down near the fire ‘to avoid infection’ Daryl gestured to his own cheek.

‘Thanks again’ Kat popped a pill and threw the bottle back at Daryl ‘can you do stitches?’ 

Daryl shook his head after a few seconds of internal debate ‘not on a woman’s face’

Kat’s soft laughter filled the air for a few seconds ‘I do need ‘em and I guess it’ll make me hotter’ she shrugged, grinning in Daryl’s way. He shook his head and cocked an eyebrow at the fire. 

‘The bleeding won’t stop’ Kat stopped laughing and wiped away the fresh blood off her cheek to prove her point ‘If you can’t help, I’ll do it myself anyway before the last ray of light goes away completely’ Daryl didn’t answer, but looked briefly at the cut on her cheek, before Kat got up and retrieved the same bag she used before in the car.

She took out the disinfectant, a sewing needle and a roll of black fishing line. Watching her trying to wrap her head around the fact that she’ll have to do it herself, Daryl moved on the same side as her, taking the needle from her fingers and bending the thin metal piece in a U shape. He tied a knot of fishing line at the end of it and held it out towards the fire to disinfect it in its flames. Kat watched as he poured liquid disinfectant on it, before she turned facing her. 

Daryl crossed his legs sitting next to her, gesturing her to place her head on his lap. Kat complied, bracing herself thinking about what was coming her way. She looked up at him before she nodded and closed her eyes. Daryl hesitated a few seconds, before piercing the skin on her temple with the curved needle. Kat tensed at the pain, eyes wide shut, but Daryl scolded her ‘Keep yer eyes shut in a normal way’. Kat complied, her breath becoming short and ragged. As he saw her relax a bit, he continued, pushing the needle back through the skin and taking it out on the other side of the wound. Kat was feeling the fishing line slip in and out agonizingly slow. Working his way down to her cheekbone, Daryl placed his fingers under her chin, trying to move her head in a position he could easily stitch the rest of the cut up.

By the time he finished, Kat’s face was full of tears and she could tell that the fabric on his cargo pants was damp. Tying up the last knot and cutting down the fishing line, Daryl placed the used stuff back in her bag, next to them. Kat didn’t move away immediately, only opening her eyes a few minutes after she collected herself. She noticed her right hand was clutching his shirt and let go as soon as she processed it. She wiped away the tears and her runny nose, going back in a sitting position. Kat nodded as a thank you, puffy eyes meeting his for a brief moment. She took out the cigarettes placing one between her lips and offering Daryl one as well. He took it and lit it up quickly, before he held out the lighter towards her. Kat puffed away at the cigarette while gazing into the fire.  
‘Hey’ Daryl gestured at her to turn her head towards him. Kat realized he wanted to check the stitches he gave her and turned her head for him to see ‘Makes you hotter’ he stated drily but on an amused tone.

Kat’s eyes went wide for a second before she started laughing, turning to face the fire again ‘Told you’ 

*

‘What about the guns?’ Andrea pointed out, as the group was preparing the search parties for Sophia.

The morning was grim, the sun was up for a while now and everyone was trying to keep a cool head, to help search for the little girl. Kat was waiting beside Rick, as he unfolded the knife holder they found yesterday in one of the abandoned cars. It had everything from hunting knives to axes, someone out there was prepared for the apocalypse but never got to use it, as every weapon laid on the car in front of them was brand new. 

‘We've been over that’ Shane pointed out ‘Daryl, Rick and I are carrying’ he stopped, giving a sideway glance to Kat ‘Kat too. We can't have people popping off rounds every time a tree rustles’ the man concluded, crossing his arms on his chest, giving no other option to Andrea.

‘It's not the trees I'm worried about’ the blonde woman admitted in defeat, her eyes wondering across the hunting kit laid in front of her.

‘Say somebody fires at the wrong moment, a herd happens to be passing by’ Kat supported Shane’s point of view and as much as she despised the man right now, he was right. 

‘See, then it's game over for all of us. So you need to get over it’ Shane gestured widely at the group.

Daryl spelled out the route they would take around the creek and started pacing around preparing his crossbow, leaving the group to scatter around preparing their supplies. Kat followed suite, checking the rifle magazine. She noticed she was running low on ammo, but brushed it off quickly, placing the rifle on her left shoulder and going through the motion checking the twin set of hunting knives on her leg. The strap was secured in its place on her left thigh, while the weight of the blades calmed her a bit. She bent to get a water bottle from the supplies and heard Andrea going off on Dale.

‘And if I decide that I have nothing to live for, who the hell are you to tell me otherwise?’ the woman’s voice cracked and she stared at Kat for a brief moment ‘To force my hand like that?’ Andrea directed her gaze back to Dale.

‘I saved your life’ the old man tried to reason with her, but she cut him off quickly.

‘No. I saved yours. You forced that on me’ Andrea sighed, continuing her speech towards Dale.

Kat decided it was not for her ears to hear that, but thought back at the moment she saw them barely escaping out of the CDC building when she helped the two of them get away from the walkers. The woman she saw in that moment did not want to die, but she pondered that Andrea needed to come to terms with herself before Kat would point that out loud and clear. Again, it was not her business.  
She stretched her neck and jerked her head to the right with a satisfying pop, before she briefly touched the stitches on her cheek. Looking down at her clean fingers, she noticed the wound stopped bleeding for a while now. Kat searched Daryl’s eyes and when she found his stare already on hers, she gave him a short nod, before following him down into the woods.

The group marched behind Daryl, while keeping close to each other, before Daryl raised a hand, signaling them to stop. Rick turned around and gestured to the rest of the group to stay put, while motioning towards Kat and Shane to follow him.

Keeping steady and following Daryl to what seemed to be a tent in the middle of the woods, Kat gripped her rifle in position. She walked past Shane and Rick, next to Daryl, aiming the rifle at the tent’s entrance, while the man quietly tried to see if there was someone inside. Without any apparent movement coming from inside, Daryl threw his arms in the air, gesturing towards Rick to bring Carol. The woman called out after her daughter, her voice calm but breaking with every second there was no answer back. Daryl unzipped the tent’s entrance slowly, keeping his hunting knife in his right hand while Kat was pointing the rifle inside. The smell that hit them as soon as the tent was opened wide, turned they stomachs upside down. Daryl covered his face with the back of his hand, looking inside while Kat scowled at the foul smell, but her hands never faltered. Whatever died there, could be dangerous. 

Shane and Rick started coughing outside the tent, as Daryl entered to check inside. After a few seconds, the man emerged from the tent, grimacing at the smell, but had an unknown gun in his hand.  
‘Ain’t her’ he managed to breathe out ‘It’s a guy. Did what Jenner said. Oppted out. Ain’t that what you call it?’ Daryl spat in Andrea’s direction. 

Before the blonde woman could put into words a witty comeback, the woods was filled with a sound that made them all freeze. Bells were ringing continuously through the air, not far away from them. The group started moving in the direction where the sound was coming from, but stopped briefly trying to pinpoint exactly where the source could be. 

Kat heard Carol’s hopeful words that maybe Sophia was hearing them too and with a bit of luck she could be right ‘This way’ Kat spoke to the group without looking their way, breathless while running through the woods. The rest followed closely for a couple of minutes, until the bells stopped ringing. Kat continued to lead the way, keeping straight in the direction she was sure it came from. She pushed aside a stray branch and she came upon a white abandoned looking church.

‘This can’t be it’ Shane tried to catch his breath ‘it has no bells’ but the group continued to move in its direction, passing tombstones, going straight for the church’s door.  
Rick stopped in front of the closed door and gestured everyone to keep silent. Daryl and Shane joined him, all three of them ready to act if necessarily. Kat was standing behind them, as Rick opened the doors slowly, only to be met by three walkers, raising from the benches and coming their way. 

Kat stood back, as she watched the three men getting their knives ready and just in a few seconds, all thee corpses were lying down, blood flowing from their heads. She flinched when she noticed both Rick and Shane hitting the corpses repeatedly, even if it was clear as day that they weren’t getting back up. Kat felt a hand pushing her away from the door, bringing her back from what the scene she just witnessed triggered in her. Carol went past her, eyes roaming around the room, until Daryl’s voice echoed through the four walls.

‘Sophia!’ his voice was full of rage and frustration, and even after a few seconds of complete silence, it was met with nothing. No answer.

Just as Shane was rambling around about the missing steeple and that it was the wrong building, the bells started echoing loud and clear. Kat pushed past Lori outside, followed by Daryl and the rest of the group. Noticing the speakers mounted on the outside walls of the building, her heart dropped into her stomach. 

Even after Glenn found the switch and he turned it off, her hands were still gripping the rifle for dear life. Kat let go of it, and paced around until she distanced herself from the group. She leaned against a tree next to the open graveyard and let herself slide down in a sitting position, taking out the pack of Morley and lighting up a cigarette. 

She watched as most of the group followed Carol inside the church, as she rested her arms on her bent knees. Taking another drag out of the cigarette, Kat brushed her fingers through the stray locks of hair that were too short to stay into her braid and sighed, closing her eyes.

‘How’s the stitches?’ she opened her eyes to see Daryl coming her way, eyes squinting facing the sun, crossbow rested on his back. 

Kat scoffed but smiled anyway without facing him as he got closer.

‘Making me look hotter’ she tried to impersonate his line from the other night, lowering her voice until it became deeper than her usual tone, southern accent flawlessly rolling down her tongue. She looked up at him and flashed an all-knowing grin, before reverting to her original voice. ‘It’s good I guess. Bleeding stopped so that’s that’ she continued while putting out the remains of the cigarette.  
Daryl exhaled through his nose louder than intended, but nodded and leaned against the same tree as her, on her left side, both facing the church. After a few minutes of silence, Kat’s eyebrows furrowed, sending a small jolt of pain to her temple.

‘Do you think we’ll find her?’ she asked with her eyes on the grass her boots were resting on. ‘I pushed her under that car’ Kat continued before Daryl could give any answers, biting the inside of her cheek.

‘Not your fault’ he gave a short answer ‘I’ll find her’ Daryl continued and kicked the tree with the heel of his boot, lost in his thoughts. Kat nodded at the grass, but the guilt was slowly spreading inside her, creeping up under her skin.

They stayed in silence for a while, before the rest of the group came out of the church and headed their way. Shane and Rick stopped a few feet away to talk privately, while the others joined Kat and Daryl under the tree. Kat was starting to see Rick as their leader, however she couldn’t see Shane the same way. He had brief moments of a clear mind, but most of the time she only saw a dangerous, ruthless man, capable of stepping on anyone and anything in order to get his way. As if on cue, Shane got closer to them, moving his shotgun from one hand to the other and Kat visibly tensed at the man’s presence, thing that did not go unnoticed by Daryl who was watching her from where he stood against the tree. 

It seemed the two of them decided to split up and continue the search, him and Rick searching the woods around the church, while Daryl led the rest of the group down the creek, following the original plan. 

‘Splittin’ us up?’ Daryl asked, moving away from the tree in order to face Shane.

‘You sure?’ Kat trailed off while getting off the ground back on her feet. Her eyes went from Shane to Rick, searching any sign of validation on the latter’s face.

‘We’ll catch up to you’ Rick concluded, which was enough for Kat. 

She rolled her arm clockwise while pressing down on her shoulder with a gloved hand, before throwing a look in Shane’s direction. Kat was aware that what she did pissed him off, but after what happened the day before, she wasn’t going to take orders from him. 

Daryl started walking towards of the woods and Kat followed after a few seconds, while the rest of the group started moving their way as well. Turning her head back to the church to check if everyone was coming, she noticed Carl stayed behind with Rick and Shane. 

*

They were already deep into the woods, with Daryl leading the way, when a gunshot echoed through the trees. The group stopped briefly, looking at one another. Kat gave a concerned look to Daryl, before moving closer to him.

‘That was a shotgun’ Kat whispered when she passed by him stopping next to him, her back facing the rest of the group. Daryl gave her a side look before looking back at the group, fully aware of the implications she was laying in front of him.

‘Nah’ he whispered back at her ‘he wouldn’t do that. The kid’s with ‘em’

Kat gave him an incredulous look before nodding skeptically and turned around to face the group as well. Her mind kept remembering her the way Shane moved his shotgun from one hand to the other before they left the church and split up. She brushed it off quickly, Daryl was right. Even Shane wouldn’t be such a monster, killing a father next to his son.

The group debated whether Shane or Rick would choose such a loud way to put down a walker, before Daryl told them to stick to the plan and search for Sophia, working their way back to the highway.  
Kat took the lead and distanced herself from the group, only to turn her head back and hear Daryl saying that he’ll find the girl.

‘Am I the only one sane here?’ he continued, briefly looking at Kat’s figure. Daryl stormed off from the group back on their original tracks, passing Kat and leading the way. 

She jumped over a few fallen tree following him in absolute silence, only the cracking noise of branches being stepped on filling the air. The man didn’t want to let it show, but he was concerned as well. However, it seemed to her that he believed he’ll find the girl, more than her own mother did.


	3. Don't worry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is shorter than the first two, but hopefully it'll be forgiven considering that I'll update the story rather soon. Thank you, quarantine :)

‘How much farther?’ Andrea asked from somewhere behind the group.

‘Not much. Maybe a hundred yards’ Daryl answered shortly, leading the way. 

Kat was following him, looking back at the rest of the group once in a while, making sure everyone was still together. She sighed, looking up and noticing that it would get dark soon. They had been searching the woods since the break of dawn, but no sign of Sophia. Kat started to believe that Daryl was chasing ghosts, but she didn’t have the heart to tell him. If anything, she actually admired how driven he was to find the girl and how convinced his heart was that she was somewhere out there, safe and sound, waiting for them to bring her back. Looking back at the group, Kat noticed Andrea straying away from them and not even a few seconds after, the blonde woman’s screams could be heard echoing through the trees.

Kat jumped to the side, following the screams only to see a walker on top of Andrea and the woman’s legs trying to push it off of her. The look on her face, the way she fought back. Kat knew Andrea realized it. She wanted to live. In a matter of seconds, Kat took out both of her hunting knives out and was about to jump on the walker when the top of its head flew past her and the lifeless body dropped to the ground.

Kat froze in place, blinking twice at the woman who just saved Andrea’s life.

‘Lori? Lori Grimes?’ the woman yelled at the group.

Kat went next to Andrea, helping her back to her feet, trying to make sense of what the woman riding the horse was saying. Carl was shot. Rick sent her. Kat furrowed her brows at Lori following the woman without a second thought. Daryl shared her concerns it seemed, as he was yelling after Lori not to go with her.

‘You can't get on that horse’ Daryl yelled at Lori, but the woman successfully ignored him.

‘Rick said you had others on the highway, that big traffic snarl?’ the woman riding the horse questioned no one in particular. Glenn nodded with confusion plastered all over his face. ‘Two miles down is our farm. You'll see the mailbox’ she trailed off, yelling at the group as Lori climbed up next to her. ‘Name's Greene’

The group watched confused as Lori disappeared into the woods, on the back of a horse. Kat shot a glare in Daryl’s way, seeing him boil with anger. ‘Come on ya’ll, move’ he shouted at the group, picking up their way back to the highway. 

In a few minutes they were back on the highway, hopping over the metal fence towards the RV. Kat jumped over, boots slamming on the concrete, grabbing the rifle off her back and throwing it on the nearest car. She searched a bottle of water through all their supplies and when she found one, she rejoined the group that gathered around the RV. Hopping on the back of the car where she threw her rifle seconds ago, Kat listened to Dale and Glenn’s conversation, water bottle opened in her right hand.

‘Shot? What do ya mean shot?’ Dale asked panicking. 

‘I don't know, Dale. I wasn't there. All I know is this chick rode out of nowhere like Zorro on a horse and took Lori’ Glenn spat out, unsure of what he was saying either. 

‘And you let her?’ Dale shot an incredulous look at both Daryl and Kat.

‘Climb out of my asshole, man. Rick sent her’ Daryl mumbled towards Dale. 

‘She knew Lori's name and Carl's’ Kat explained, pausing from drinking water, a few droplets running down her chin, which she wiped with the back of her hand. She looked down at the fingerless leather gloves she was sporting and scowled in disgust.

The group debated whether they should all head to the farm or not, considering Sophia might come back to the highway while they were gone, while Kat kept silent. She didn’t want to voice her opinion, as realistic as it was, she couldn’t break the remaining pieces of Carol’s heart. Most of them agreed to stay behind, to leave some supplies and make a sign for Sophia.

‘Well, if you’re all staying, then I’m-‘ Glenn tried to voice his thoughts before Kat interrupted him.

‘Not you, Glenn. You’re going’ Kat nodded in his way ‘Take Carol’s car, we need to find the farm, reconnect with the rest of the group’ she added, while looking at Daryl.

‘You have to take T-Dog there. The cut has gone from bad to worse’ Dale pointed at T-Dog who was visibly in a worse state than they left him in that morning. ‘See if they have antibiotics, he has a very serious blood infection’ Dale spoke in a concerned tone.

Kat’s eyes widened and she snapped her head towards Daryl, both of them thinking about of the same thing.

‘Why’d ya wait till now to say something?’ Daryl said moving towards his bike ‘Got my brother’s stash’

He took out the bag of pills and placed it next to Kat, rummaging through the bottles. Kat scrunched her nose at the man mentioning various drugs before she recognized one bottle, the one Daryl threw her way the other night before he stitched her up.

‘Doxycycline. Not the generic stuff either’ he took the pills out of the bag and started walking in T-Dog’s direction ‘It’s first class. Merle got the clap on occasion’

Kat spit out the gulp of water she was just trying to drink, catching herself by surprise but managed to recompose shortly after, following the more mature reactions of the group.

Daryl closed the distance between him and the car Kat was sitting on, taking the crossbow off his back. He gave her a concerned look, biting the inside of his lower lip.

‘Yeah, I’m going’ Kat broke the silence ‘If you guys are staying here the night, someone has to go with them’ she trailed off, clutching the water bottle in both her hands, eyes inspecting her filthy gloves once again.

‘Good’ Daryl patted her on the shoulder and wanted to get back to his bike before he stopped in his tracks, his eyes on Kat’s neck. The cut Shane gave her when he yanked the chain from her neck, was looking bad but it started to heal. Kat jerked her head to the side, giving him a knowing look ‘Be safe’ Daryl mumbled and removed his hand from her shoulder. 

Kat nodded in response, but he was already gone. She had to get to the farm as soon as possible. Her gut was bugging her continuously that something bad was about happen ever since she heard that shot in the woods and it had nothing to do with Carl. She had to keep an eye on Shane.

*

Kat pulled her bike next to where Glenn parked Carol’s car. The drive to the farm was rather short, nothing happened on their way there, but still Kat couldn’t wrap her head around this place. It was more than peaceful and as much as she paced around the farm for the past hour, she didn’t stumble upon any damn walker. The entire farm was untouched.

She started walking towards the house, finishing off her cigarette, just in time to see Rick and Lori on the porch. Kat headed their way, waving at them before closing in. Rick was looking horrible, the blood in his face was gone, his cheeks hallow and his eyes were bloodshot, dark circles around them. He looked like he aged 30 years in just a few hours. 

‘Hey’ Kat managed to whisper towards the couple ‘how’s Carl?’ 

‘Barely hanging in there’ Rick’s voice cracked, and he put both his hands on his head ‘Shane went with Otis to bring something for him. If they don’t show up soon- ’ he started pacing around the porch, hand covering his mouth.

‘Otis?’ Kat asked after a few moments, trying to understand the situation.

‘Yeah’ Rick breathed ‘The man who shot Carl. It was an accident, I was there, but-‘ as soon as he started explaining, Kat started to put the pieces together.

She went up the few steps to get next to Rick on the porch. Kat placed a hand on his shoulder and gave a small apologetic look in Lori’s direction. 

‘Kat’ Lori’s weak voice drew her attention ‘Carl needs blood’ the woman looked at Kat with pleading eyes ‘what blood type-‘

Rick cut her off as soon as the words rolled on her tongue. His eyes widened and he grabbed Kat by her shoulders with both hands ‘What blood type?’ he repeated Lori’s question, the look on his face making him look like a mad man.

Kat kept her distance, keeping silent for a few seconds ‘A+’ she whispered, aware of where this was going. Rick’s face lit up and he barged through the door while dragging Kat after him.

‘Hershel!’ Rick started screaming while going up the stairs, leading Kat to a random room in the house. An old man opened the door when they were about to stroll in, furrowing at the ruckus heading his way.

‘Kat. Kat’s A+’ Rick whispered to the man, fingers still digging in Kat’s forearm, leaving small bruises in the shape of his grip.

The old man locked eyes with her and moved his eyebrows silently questioning if it was true. Kat nodded and Hershel cocked his head for her to enter. Rick finally let go of her arm and she pulled it gently, caressing the fresh bruises. 

She followed Hershel and closed the door after her, leaving Rick in the hallway. The old man gestured her to sit next to the bed, where she saw Carl’s frail frame under the sheets. The boy was breathing heavily and even if he was passed out, his small face was contorted in pain, taking its toll on his body.

Kat held out her arm before Hershel turned back to her. He gestured to the woman beside him to get ready for another transfusion, while he started disinfecting Kat’s skin. He stopped midway and locked eyes with Kat after seeing the stitches on her face and the cut on the nape of her neck. She grabbed the hem of her baggy tank top and showed the man the bandages on her hip, watching him hesitate.  
‘No infection’ Kat whispered, certitude lacing her voice ‘Doxycycline’ 

Hershel nodded and continued the preparation for the blood transfusion. He pushed the thick needle in Kat’s right arm, watching the blood flow after a few seconds. 

‘Hershel Greene’ the old man spoke while still holding onto her arm.

‘Kat’ she nodded, watching the blood flowing steadily through the tube. ‘Take as much as he needs’ Kat looked at Carl, her lower lip starting trembling. She bit down hard almost drawing blood, trying to wash the feeling away. First Sophia, then Carl; they couldn’t lose him, under any circumstances. 

After a few minutes, Hershel took the needle out and pressed down on the skin to stop the bleeding.

‘You just gave him another hour at most’ he spoke towards Kat while cleaning up after him ‘Every minute counts’ he added, smiling at her.

Kat gave a weak smile and tried to stand up, but the room started to spin around her. Hershel grabbed her arm and steadied her on her feet, leading her out of the room where Rick was waiting. The old man nodded in his direction and instructed him to take Kat back down the stairs.

Rick took her arm and placed it around his shoulders, leading her to the stairs, this time gently as if not to break her. Both of them dragged their feet slowly down the stairs, not trusting themselves to walk faster. 

‘Thank you’ Rick voice cracked, when they reached the first floor.

‘ _Не волнуйся_ ’ Kat took her arm off his shoulders and headed for the door, and dragged her feet out on the porch. Rick followed her and joined Lori outside, hugging his wife.

Kat went down the steps and leaned against the wooden rail feeling spent, less than a few seconds later noticing a set of headlights coming their way. 

‘It’s them’ Lori cried out broke away from Rick’s arms, both jumping off the porch towards the car.

Shane got out of the car, limping towards Rick and throwing a bag in his arms. Kat stared at the car a few seconds, realizing there was no one else coming out. She shifted her weight from one leg to the other, the sick feeling crawling back under her skin.

‘And Otis?’ Hershel asked as he was just opening the door, eyes glued on the car. Shane shook his head, trying to explain what happened, visibly shaken to the core.

Kat was slowly calming down, until she noticed the shotgun on Shane’s shoulder. It was definitely not his. Her stomach dropped and she had to steady herself against the rail. Shane looked at her, eyes wide and pupils dilatated, holding out his hand towards her as he approached, shotgun falling from his shoulder to his forearm right in front of Kat.

‘You good?’ Shane asked her and Kat nodded petrified.

‘Dad, you need to look at her too, she doesn’t look good’ the girl who picked Lori up spoke softly from the old man’s side, voice cracking at the news they had received.

Kat shook her head, assuring them she was fine, but the woman came down the stairs and took her arm, leading her back to the house.

Inside, the blonde woman who helped Hershel with the transfusion was pacing around, taking various items from the bag, before putting it all back in and decided to carry the whole bag up the stairs. The girl who led Kat in the house, showed her to the table in the kitchen, and sat her on a chair. Kat was in a small shock, she didn’t feel safe in the same house as Shane.

‘I’m Maggie’ the girl’s voice startled her and she looked up with a confused look on her face.

‘Uh- yeah, Kat’ she smiled weakly, trying to gather her thoughts. Kat extended her right hands towards Maggie and the girl took it, slightly shaking it.

‘It was a long day for all of you and it’s getting late’ Maggie wiped away her tears ‘You can take the couch if you want. I’ll show you to the shower as soon as your friend gets out’ the girl studied Kat’s dirty clothes and noticed the cuts and bruises on her face and neck.

Kat nodded, as Maggie stood up from her chair and placed a glass of water in front of her and disappeared from the kitchen. As good as a couch sounded at that moment, Kat couldn’t close an eye in the same house as Shane, only if he would give her another concussion.

Maggie returned to the kitchen shortly after, a set of fresh clothes in her hands. She placed it on the chair next to Kat and leaned against the counter.

‘I’m sorry for your loss’ Kat spoke up breaking the silence. Maggie wiped her nose and thanked her. 

‘He was a good man’ Maggie whispered, as they heard footstep down the stairs coming their way. 

Shane was all cleaned up, but what drew Kat’s attention was the shaved head. He stopped in front of the kitchen for a few seconds, before going straight outside. Maggie gestured to follow her up the stairs to the bathroom. Kat followed after she took the clean set of clothes from the chair, dragging her feet up the stairs for a second time today.

As soon as Maggie left, Kat closed the door and locked it behind her. Pointless action, but it made her feel safer. For some reason, all she wanted in that moment was having Daryl around. Weirdly enough, the man made her feel safe. Kat was a strong woman; a fighter, a former soldier who could easily handle herself and protect herself but the murderous aura around Shane made her sick to her stomach.  
Kat undressed slowly, peeling off the dirty cargo pants from her legs and throwing the piece of clothing on the floor, followed soon by the baggy tank top and her sports bra. She untied her braid, combing it with her fingers, before stepping into the shower. The hot water was making her wounds sting, but it was the first shower she took in a few weeks, so she brushed it off quickly. She washed away all the dry blood from her hair, before peeling off the bandages Carol placed on her hip. Kat hissed as soon as the water hit the healing wound and tried her best to clean the dry blood away. She noticed the fresh but small bruises on her arms, and she chuckled drily, she looked awful.

Stepping outside the shower, she dried herself off with a clean towel and looked in the mirror. The sight of her bruised face made her frown, but her eyes lingered on her cheekbone where the black fishing line was sewed into her skin. She gave a small smile to her reflection and grabbed the black shirt and blue jeans Maggie brought her earlier, taking out her damp hair after she dressed up. Kat smoothed out her long hair, gently drawing it all on her left shoulder, before she started braiding it, working through its whole length. 

Putting her boots back on after she cleaned after herself, Kat unlocked the door and went down the stairs. As she was almost at the base of the stair, she heard an agonizing cry echoing through the house. She stopped for a few seconds to collect herself, before jumping off the last step. Kat glanced towards the kitchen, where Maggie was holding onto the crying woman in her arms.  
She breathed out, shamefully relieved that it was not Lori and stepped outside the house on the porch.


	4. Airhead

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the current quarantine, I'll probably post the updates daily, so at least one good thing comes out from trying not to go crazy stuck between four walls for two weeks now :)

At the crack of dawn, Kat was already up and paced around Carol’s car. Not even an inch of her body was able to rest through the night. She tried to take Maggie’s invitation and sleep on the couch inside the house, but after a few minutes of constant tossing and turning, she took the blanket she was offered and went outside, choosing Carol’s car over a real bed. 

She was about to go and get ready to look around the farm for a second time since they arrived, when she noticed the RV down the road, heading her way. Soon enough, she heard the well-known, loud sound of the bike too and something inside her relaxed.

While everyone got out of the RV, and both Rick and Lori came of the house to meet the rest of their group alongside Hershel, Kat noticed Daryl had parked his bike next to hers. She pondered whether to tell Daryl about Shane or not, but right now was not the right moment, as she saw everyone settling in, making themselves comfortable under the trees in front of Hershel’s house.

Rick gathered the group and let them know that the old man offered them shelter until Carl got better, so for now everyone seemed to roam around, deciding where to place their tents. Well that was going to be a problem, as Kat furrowed at the camping equipment sprawled on the grass, in the shade of the trees. She only had a few bags of supplies with her, considering she had been jumping from house to house up until she met the group at the CDC.

‘Kat’ Glenn shouted as he ran towards her with a blue bulky looking bag on his shoulder ‘I can take the backseat of the car and you can have my tent’ he adjusted his hat in its place, stopping next to her.  
Kat shook her head with the best grateful expression she could make, plastered on her face. 

‘No need to’ Daryl mumbled, joining the two of them and throwing a bag in Kat’s way. She caught it before she was able to voice any kind of answer to Glenn and threw a questioning look at Daryl.  
‘And you?’ she questioned, hugging the bag to her chest.

‘Got mine. That’s Merle’s’ he furrowed at the bag for a second, before locking eyes with Kat ‘My brother’s’ he completed, before leaving to get some bags from his bike.

‘Daryl has a brother?’ Kat followed the man with her gaze for a while, before she turned to face Glenn. He scratched the back of his neck, confused on where to start.

‘It’s complicated’ Glenn concluded ‘Rick cuffed Merle to a pipe on top of a building back in Atlanta and we left him there. When we went back to get him, he was nowhere to be found’ his shoulders dropped, visibly guilty ‘Crazy fuck cut his hand off to get out of there before we arrived’

Kat tried to process what was thrown at her, without trying to judge too much, but her expression must have betrayed her train of thoughts, because Glenn was squirming under her stare.

‘Daryl doesn’t let us even touch his brother’s bike’ he gestured at the bag she was still hugging ‘so be sure to take care of that’ he threw a smile at her, as if he didn’t just told a story about a man cutting his own hand off, before he jogged back to the rest of the group.

Kat shook her head in both amusement and surprise and went to find a good spot for Merle’s tent. She noticed most of the group picking spots close to one another, next to the RV and the cars, but Daryl was setting up his tent at the edge of the camp, fumbling around with the camping equipment.

She walked around for a few minutes carrying the bag after her, trying to choose a damn spot, far away from the house and more important, far away from where she guessed Shane will sleep. Starring at an empty spot, she was about to throw the bag to the ground and start unpacking, but Daryl stopped her.

‘No good’ he shook his head, stopping a few feet away from her, wiping his forehead with his forearm ‘Ground’s too soft, pegs won’t hold’

Kat bit her lower lip and looked at him with a genuinely confused expression. She had absolutely no idea what she was supposed to do, she had never set a tent in her entire life. Daryl caught onto it and gestured her to follow him to a shaded spot between the rest of the group and his own tent, a few feet away from the others, but far enough from Shane’s. She threw the bag to the ground, crouching next to it, trying to spill the contents on the grass, throwing a grateful look towards Daryl.

‘Thanks’ she nodded facing away from him ‘uh-‘ Kat turned her head and looked around confused. ‘I never set a tent in my life’

Daryl stood there for a few seconds with his arms crossed on his chest, looking at her before bending down to pick up the tent poles ‘They don’t teach ya camping back in Russia?’ 

‘Never had to’ Kat shook her head while trying to figure out how that damn thing was supposed to be placed, lying the unfolded tent upside down, with the base facing the sky. 

Daryl connected the poles, watching her frowning, moving her head from one side to another like a lost puppy. 

‘Shittin’ me right now, aren’t ya?’ 

‘Not a damn bit, sunshine’ Kat grinned at him ‘Sniping a moving target from a mile away, sure; setting a fucking tent, not so much’ she concluded finally finding the entrance and flipping the fabric around, with the base on the grass, a triumphant smile creeping up her face .

Daryl squinted down at her, finishing connecting all the poles and crouched next to Kat, pushing the first pole through.

‘Walker. Sniping a walker from a mile away’ Kat corrected herself, any hint of smile being dropped in a second. She bit the inside of her cheek and held the tent in place while Daryl was working on it, its dome starting to shape up.

Both of them kept working on setting up the tent in silence after that, the only few exceptions when Kat started cursing in Russian after tripping over a peg she hadn’t seen.

‘For a first class walker sniper, ya sure aren’t acting like one’ Daryl muttered, cocking an eyebrow at Kat’s frame as she circled around the tent to check on the other pegs. 

‘What do you mean?’ she asked, noticing the lack of fingerless gloves, after wiping her forehead with the back of her hand. 

‘Dun’ know’ Daryl shrugged, looking at the perfectly set up tent in front of him ‘ya’re a bit of an airhead’

Kat stretched and peeled off the sweaty strands of hair stuck to her neck, throwing a confused look at him. 

‘My brother’s a vet. Served in the U.S. Army. Motherfucker got discharged after punching a sergeant and went to prison’ Daryl trailed off, squinting at the tent absentmindedly. ‘Still gets stuck in some dark places ‘round his mind sometimes’ 

Kat listened, knowing exactly what he was talking about. She crossed the distance between them and threw her bags into the tent, zipping it back up. ‘Sometimes you just need something to come back for’ she got back up to her feet, facing him. ‘Other times you just can’t’ she shrugged, clutching her dog tags. 

‘Do ya?’ Daryl asked, locking eyes with her. 

‘Sometimes’ she answered, looking at the identification numbers engraved on the piece of metal clutched in her hand. ‘I just know my way back’ 

*

Everyone gathered at a symbolic funeral for Otis, as the man not only saved Carl, but apparently saved Shane too. Kat’s senses went wild as Shane started talking about Otis’ last moments, a request from the late man’s wife. The look on his face, the gestures he made, the way he talked, the panicked, slightly crazy eyes looking like popping out of his head any second, Kat knew very well what he was going through. She took a step back from where she was standing, looking at the symbolic grave, while Shane kept talking, fearing that her hunches were spot on. He killed Otis.

‘We got to save the boy’ Shane’s voice cracked as he mentioned Otis’ last words.

Kat found Dale staring at her. She noticed the alarmed look on the man’s face, mirroring hers, but brushed it off quickly, before anyone else could catch on her train of thoughts. But Daryl felt her distraught mood and turned his head around briefly to look at her. Kat locked eyes with him and shook her head, pressing her lips together in a strained smile.

As soon as the ceremony ended, everyone marched silently back to the small camping site they put together that morning. Kat slowed her steps down so she’d be left behind, following the group from a safe distance, trying to gather her thoughts.

‘Kat’ Daryl stopped in his tracks, watching her walk towards him.

‘Easy, love, if we hang around each other that much, they’ll start thinking we’re hooking up’ Kat flashed a shit eating grin at him, while passing by, trying to mask the obvious concern on her face.  
Daryl blinked at her, an unimpressed look on his face, but followed her closely. He grabbed her arm, stopping her from going away and forced her to face him.

‘He won’t touch you again if that’s what ya thinking about’ he muttered the words on a low tone. Kat placed her hand on his, and pushed it away from where he was grabbing her arm.  
‘That’s not it and you know it’ she whispered through her teeth, frowning at him, all acting dropped.

‘Stay away from him, woman’ Daryl continued on an annoyed tone, closing the distance between them even more ‘Whatever goes through that head of yours, for yer own good, drop it’ he went on, jabbing his finger in front of her face, before stomping away without another word.

Kat watched him walking away, a bit taken aback at the fact that he was actually trying to look out for her, but she was more pissed off at the realization that Daryl was drawing the same, clear as day, conclusions about what happened with Otis, but he chose to do nothing.

*

Kat was not happy about the current situation. Rick agreed to Hershel’s no gun policy on his property, leaving them out in the open in the prospect of an overrun. As much as she was okay with Rick trying to persuade the old man to stay at the farm indefinitely, the lack of guns was a bad idea. She slammed her rifle on the hood of the car as everybody else and strolled off from the group, as soon as she saw Daryl approach.

Not even a few minutes later, Rick approached her as she was sharpening her hunting knives, leaning against her bike and trying to tune out the different conversation around her. 

‘Look, I know how you must feel about Hershel’s rule’ Rick’s tried to reason with her ‘but we’re guests here, he took us in when he could have easily turn a blind eye, leaving us out there’

Kat stopped briefly and inspected the blade for a few seconds, sighing. She turned her head in Rick’s direction and nodded with a defeated look on her face. 

‘Now I know part of us know their way with guns, but most of the group doesn’t. Would you be willing to teach them how to shoot?’ Rick placed a hand on her shoulder ‘Shane will be helping as well, he’s one of the best instructors I know’ 

Kat slightly flinched at the sound of Shane’s name and Rick didn’t miss it. He removed his hand from her shoulder and took a step back.

‘I know you two didn’t start on the right foot’ he trailed off, looking at the healing bruise on her face ‘but-‘

‘Okay’ Kat cut him off, waving a hand through the air. She was not comfortable enough being around the man, but the thought of him with a gun in his hand around the others, pushed her to agree with Rick’s offer. 

‘Thanks’ Rick nodded satisfied, letting her go back sharpening her knives.


	5. The switch

There they were, Kat and her favorite person in the apocalypse, teaching housewives to shoot at empty bottles and empty cans. She settled with teaching guns 101 to Carol, leaving Shane to handle Andrea a few feet away from them.

Kat held the handgun in front of Carol, explaining how the safety works while gesturing how to put it back on while in standby. 

‘The magazine is right here’ she pointed at the grip’s bottom ‘and here you press to release it’ Kat pressed the magazine release and pulled it out, noticing it was half empty. She went on about how the slide top worked and its purpose when she realized she was talking to the air. Carol tried her best to focus on her explanation, but her mind obviously drifted off, still nodding absently after every explanation Kat was giving.

‘You just need to slide it like this, place your finger on the trigger’ Kat spoke in a matter of factly tone ‘and the kitten will pop out immediately’ she looked at Carol’s face, searching for any signs that she was listening to her.

Carol locked eyes with her while nodding and gave a weak smile, realization dawning upon her. Kat returned the smile and dropped her arms still holding onto the handgun.

‘How are you hanging in there?’ Kat whispered, placing a hand on Carol’s shoulder.

The woman shook her head, staring at her shoes. Her vision got blurry and she quickly wiped it away, shaking her head, trying to get rid of the tightness forming in her chest.

‘I just want to find my baby. Get closure’ Carol sobbed ‘and I see everyone, I see them avoiding me, afraid of telling me the truth’ her voice turned to a whisper, frustration seeping through. 

Kat squeezed her shoulder lightly, shaking Carol’s frame softly in the process. 

‘We’ll find her’ Kat forced a smile on her lips ‘Daryl’s already out there, looking for her and we’ll make an organized search party, I promise you, we’ll find her’ she placed the handgun in Carol’s hand ‘So how about we try this thing and make an even more badass woman out of you?’ Kat smirked at her, cocking an eyebrow playfully.

Carol pressed her lips into a small smile and nodded, gripping the gun in her right hand. She aimed it at the glass bottle placed on the fence a few feet away, and let Kat adjust her posture, guiding her aim for a successful shot. 

Kat pushed her arms lower, hugging Carol from the side and gave her the signal to shoot. The bottle exploded in a million pieces not a second after, making Carol smile at her small victory. 

‘Badass Carol’ Kat winked at her, a genuine smile on her lips mirroring Carol’s.

After a few other successful shots and a shotgun demonstration from Kat, they took a small break, sitting next to each other while munching on stale protein bars in silence. Kat placed the bar between her lips and rolled her arm clockwise a few times, holding onto her shoulder in the process. The shotgun’s kickback was a bitch.

‘So’ Carol trailed off on a mildly cheeky tone. Kat stopped her stretching session and leaned against Carol’s side, giving her full attention, bumping shoulders with an amused and curious look on her face.

‘You and Daryl got very friendly lately, didn’t you?’ Carol continued on the same cheeky tone, pursing her lips knowingly.

Kat chewed on the last piece of the protein bar, giving Carol a side stare, moving her eyebrows up and down ‘Why, you called dibs already?’ she asked on a fake surprise tone with her mouth still full, giving her a pursed lip smile. Carol chuckled and softly pushed her elbow in Kat’s ribs making her squirm away from her.

‘I like being around him, man has a way of making you feel safe for some reason’ Kat answered and Carol gave a knowing nod ‘So stop trying to tease me, badass Carol’ Kat shrugged fakely annoyed while getting up to her feet, pointing to Shane signaling that the break was over. She offered a hand to Carol and helped the woman get up, both of them joining Andrea and Shane.

As they closed the distance between them, Shane’s words started to shape up, something about shooting moving target, as much as Kat caught before she got in hearing distance from them.

‘They say in that kind of situation things slow down. That's crap’ Shane continued, gesturing widely ‘They speed up. Adrenalin kicks in. It'll cripple you if you let it. You need to use your instinct.’

He paused for a moment when he noticed Kat joining them ‘You got to rule it out. Because somebody is going to die and you'd better hope that you're the one who's making that decision’

‘How? I mean, how do you do that?’ the blonde woman asked, a bit too much into their discussion.

‘Turn off a switch. _The switch._ The one that makes you scared or angry, sympathetic, whatever. You don't think. You just... you act’ Shane trailed off a little shaken 'Cause odds are somebody else is counting on you. That's your partner. That's your friend’ he continued, his eyes stopping on Kat’s frame suggestively.

‘There ain't nothing easy about taking a man's life no matter how little value it may have. But when you get it done, you have to forget it’ he chuckled, breaking eye contact with Kat as if he had already gave away too much ‘I guess I haven't quite got that last part down yet’

‘But you're getting there?’ Andrea asked, concern lacing her voice.

Kat bit down on her lower lip. She knew what Shane was talking about. And it was not the fact that he had killed Otis. No. It was about the feelings that come after you end a man’s life.

‘I hope so’ Shane sighed, rubbing his recently shaven head, trying to reconnect with his surroundings.

‘It gets easier’ Kat continued to chew down on her lower lip, crossing her arms while facing both Shane and Andrea.

‘The most important part’ she trailed off, shrugging as Carol finally reached the small group ‘is to remember how to flip that switch back _on_ ’ 

‘Well, you should know’ Shane’s words dug deep inside her as a reproach, almost making her feel guilty. Kat brushed it off quickly, before something inside her got its lid popped open and she turned this gun practice into the real deal.

‘Sometimes you can’t turn the switch back on’ Kat raised her head and cocked a thin eyebrow at Shane ‘Sometimes you don’t want to’ she continued, a bit of an edge directed as a warning at the man in front of her ‘That’s when you know you won’t be able to come back’ 

Shane held her gaze for a few seconds, before she broke it, grabbing the shotgun and paced away slowly, shouting at Carol to follow her.

*

After the gun practice was over, Hershel invited the group over for dinner, which was more than welcomed. Kat hadn’t eaten a cooked meal in almost a month now and in that moment she was in pure bliss, almost inhaling the plate she was offered. She sneaked out quietly after, a content feeling running through her veins. She stopped briefly on the steps and lighted up a cigarette, before walking lazily towards the RV, to start her watch. 

She signaled T-Dog to get down, so she’d take over her shift appointed by Rick. The man made a schedule including everyone who was able to shoot a gun, hence aside her and Andrea who was keeping watch with either Shane or Dale, the rest of the women were taken out from the list for the moment. 

Kat dropped the cigarette butt to the ground and stomped on it, before kicking it under the RV. She grabbed the ladder and hoisted herself up with ease, as soon as T-Dog ended his shift and went to rest.

The farm was bathed in the orange shades of the sunset, giving Kat a strange sense of security, something she forgot she was able to feel over the past couple of months. She sat on the chair Dale always offered for whoever kept watch, and placed in her lap the rifle Hershel agreed they could keep, fingers clutching the grip.

She spaced out a bit, watching her people leaving the house one by one, checking out for the night. She smiled fondly at the fact that she was recognizing them as ‘her people’. Being accepted into the group, almost getting knocked out by Shane, proving herself worthy of their trust, all these things seemed to have happened a lifetime ago. She fit in right from the start, saving Dale and Andrea against her better thinking at that moment. Kat chuckled to herself; it turned out to be a good decision after all.

However she was starting to doubt her mild aversion directed at Shane, towards his actions that ultimately led to Carl’s survival. She replayed their conversation over and over in her head, trying to figure out if it was remorse that pushed him into voicing out those words or it was just for show. 

What if it was her in that situation, instead of Shane?

‘Well, you should know’ his words echoed in her head, getting louder with each passing moment. Sure, he was talking about the remorse that comes after, but Kat knew he was directing it at her with other intentions buried into the actual meaning. He had to do it. He didn’t want to, but he was forced to, in order to save another human being; someone from their group, a child nonetheless. Suddenly, something inside her clicked. It dawned upon her and her chest tightened painfully, making her feel trapped. She’d take someone’s life in cold blood without even blinking, in order to keep this group alive. For the past couple of months, being on her own, it all saved and sheltered her from this. Her spite directed at Shane, it was actually directed at her own self and what she stood for, for all those years before. 

Suddenly, the RV door slammed shut, anchoring her back to reality and she found herself standing on the edge of the roof, knuckles turning white gripping the rifle, with her finger locked on the trigger. She threw the rifle on the camping chair as if it burned her flesh to the bone. 

‘Two. Four. Five. Six. Two. Nine’ breathing deeply, Kat clutched her dog tags and whispered to herself the string of numbers over and over again, until she felt the adrenalin rush leaving her body. She noticed it was already dark, so she must have spaced out for quite a bit, thing that she’d want to keep to herself if she ever wanted to keep watch again for the group. 

Mustering the courage to see who slammed the door and brought her back to earth in the process, Kat moved to the edge of the RV and looked down, only to be met by a pair of piercing squinting blue eyes. Daryl nodded, lingering for a few seconds, before lazily walking away.

She let go of the dog tags, the pieces of metal dropping back to her chest with a clinking noise. Kat took a step back and moved away the rifle to sit down, waiting for her shift to end, someone else taking over the watch soon. She checked her cigarette pack and frowned at the only one she had left, taking it out and lighting it up.

As soon as she took the first drag, she heard movement coming from the RV, the door creaking as it was opened from inside. Dale got out and gestured her to come down, marking the end of her shift. Kat placed the cigarette between her lips and jumped off the roof to the ground, next to Dale. She nodded at him while stretching, walking away in the process, letting the old man to take over his watch. 

Getting closer to her tent, Kat noticed Daryl gutting the carcass of a hare. She curled her upper lip in slight disgust, exhaling a small cloud of smoke. He gave her a quick look, her figure lingering in front of her tent. Daryl pulled out the guts carefully, moving his attention back to the dead hare.

‘That’s how ya come back?’ he spoke loudly enough for Kat to hear, without facing her, while ripping out the bloody organs from the carcass.

Kat didn’t honor his question with an answer right away, taking another drag from the halfway smoked cigarette. She watched as the smoke went up in spirals in front of her, before looking in his direction again. 

‘My identification number’ she answered after a few seconds of silence, exhaling the smoke in the process.

Daryl nodded, biting on his inner lower lip. A small smile crept up Kat’s lips, as she noticed him doing this only when he was thinking hard about a certain thing sometimes. She dropped the cigarette butt to the ground after a couple drags and stepped on it.

‘ _Спокойной ночи, зайчик_ ’ 

Kat’s words confused him a little, but Daryl nodded, figuring out it was some good night phrase in Russian, as she unzipped the tent, calling in for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> зайчик - term of endearment, pet name used mostly towards a loved one (male) meaning 'bunny'  
> -  
> Through the story, I'll use some russian phrases or words, hopefully I'll remember to set up a foot note every time :)


	6. Grey zone

Early in the morning, Maggie had come by Kat’s tent, calling out to her. Pushing back the rebel grey strands of hair that dangled in front of her eyes, tangled thanks to her weird sleeping position, Kat pushed herself in a sitting position, unzipping the tent and cocked only her head out. She frowned at Maggie’s extended arms for a few seconds, a clean set of clothes in her face, before she recognized her old green cargo pants, now looking a few shades brighter.

‘Morning’ Maggie said cheerfully, arms still stretched towards Kat ‘Breakfast’s ready, coffee still hot’ 

‘ _Спасибо_ ’ Kat finally voiced out, taking her clean clothes, setting them aside, next her supply bag in the tent. 

‘See if the hunter wants any breakfast’ Maggie stuck her thumb out to her right, Kat knowing who she was talking about without looking in the way she pointed to. 

‘Also, Glenn and I will make another run later today or tomorrow’ 

Kat grinned at her, raising an eyebrow suggestively, but kept quiet. She didn’t miss the way those two acted around each other ever since they arrived at the farm. Someone was getting lucky.

Maggie flashed a short cocky smile at her, rolling her eyes as a response to Kat’s expression ‘D’ya need anything?’ 

Kat patted the outside pocket of her supply bag, frowning at its emptiness.

‘Cigarettes’ she shrugged, puckering up her lips while thinking of anything else that she’d be needing urgently ‘Yeah, cigarettes would be nice’ Kat concluded.

Maggie nodded and walked away, almost skipping on her way back to the house, as Kat watched amused. 

She zipped back the entrance, quickly taking off the black shirt Maggie lent her when she arrived to the farm. After putting on the clean black sports bra, Kat removed the bandages from her hip to inspect the healing wound. After it would heal completely, it will surely leave a nasty ass scar. Kat made a mental note to check in with Hershel later, about her current wounds’ healing progress. She pressed the bandages back to her skin, noticing the sticky part was already worn out, flapping back open as soon as she released it. 

Taking off the blue jeans, also Maggie’s – she had to wash them up and give them back, the woman and her family already did enough for them – Kat reached into her supply bag’s pockets once again, retrieving a bandage roll. She started to circle it around her hips until she was sure it will hold the worn out ones in place. 

Putting on her now clean cargo pants, she retrieved the hunting belt from where she tossed it before she went to sleep and fastened it around her clothed hips, repeating the actions on her left thigh for the lower part that had attached a handgun holder. She stared briefly at its emptiness, still not happy about the no guns policy that Hershel enforced on his land, before she put on a second leather belt, the one that carried the other hunting knife. 

Kat yanked the final piece of clothing off the floor and threw it on, the soft material of the black short top, hanging in a baggy way around her shoulders down to her stomach. She noticed her fingerless black leather gloves lying on the floor, she must’ve missed them being carefully placed by Maggie between the tank top and her cargo pants. Kat quickly bent down to retrieve them, putting them on. She smiled fondly at her hands, flexing her fingers. Those gloves felt so natural, like a second set of skin.

Unzipping the tent to get out, a stray pack of Morley’s flew threw, dropping at her feet. Kat picked it up, noticing the four cigarettes left in the pack, stepping outside. Daryl was standing a few feet away from her, crossbow already on his shoulder.

‘It’s a loan’ he stated, picking up on the silent question after noticing the confused look on Kat’s face.  
Kat flashed a delighted, yet amused smile at him while setting in place the belts hugging her hips.

‘No interest?’ she asked, one eye closed trying to adjust to the sudden light flooding her surroundings.

‘With interest’ Daryl muttered after a few seconds, adjusting the crossbow on his shoulder.

Kat’s smile turned into a cheeky grin, the skin on her right cheekbone tightening around the stitches ‘I’ll pay you back with my body’ 

Daryl’s deadpanned look made her laugh lightly, as she took out a cigarette and placed the pack in the empty gun holder secured on her left thigh. 

‘A pack from what the farmer’s girl brings ya’ he tried to avoid her nonsense. Kat’s smile dropped, a fake outraged expression taking its place as Daryl walked away from her.

‘Not the cigarettes! I’ll pay with my body!’ Kat theatrically yelled going after him, following the man on their way to the house.

‘Stop it’ he shouted over his shoulder, an amused smile softening his rough features.

*

After a short but consistent breakfast, the group decided to divide into two search parties, to cover up more ground in their search for Sophia, with Daryl going alone, picking up a trail he found the other day, and Kat leading the small group, appointed as the leader by Rick. They already knew about Daryl’s tracking skills, but Kat proved herself as well, on the first day Sophia went missing, after Rick lost her in the woods.

‘Whoever slept in that cupboard was no bigger than yay-high’ Daryl gestured with his palm facing down. ‘I'm gonna borrow a horse, head up to this ridge right here, take a bird's eye view of the whole grid. If she's up there, I'll spot her’ he dropped his arm back to his side, eyes glued to the map in front of them.

‘Maybe you'll see your chupacabra up there too’ T-Dog’s comment made Kat snort in an unladylike manner.

‘Chupacabra?’ her voice cracked in amusement, sharing a confused look with Rick.

‘You never heard this? Our first night in camp, Daryl tells us that the whole thing reminds him of a time when he went squirrel hunting and he saw a chupacabra’ Dale explained, his tone oozing sarcasm as Kat’s snorting turned to an all out laughing session..

‘What ‘re ya braying at, jackasses?’ Daryl spat in Rick and Kat’s way, a bit annoyed.

‘You believe in a blood-sucking dog?’ Rick asked amused.

'Do ya believe in dead people walkin’ around?’ Daryl’s remark shot down all witty comebacks, but the cocky smiles were still going around.

Kat shrugged and puckered her lips in fake annoyance at the point Daryl had made, brushing it off quickly and practically pounced on the bag of confiscated guns, while Dale was still sorting them out. She picked up her rifle and trailed her fingertips on its grip, caressing it as if it was her baby, before throwing the strap over her shoulder. 

Daryl took one of Hershel’s horses and left before everyone else, going to check the trail he mentioned before, while the rest of the group followed Kat back into the woods surrounding the farm. She let the others lead for a while, as this was too far away from the highway and Sophia definitely didn’t end up lost so close to the farm.

Dale was walking beside her, silently as if he was trying to come up with a good way to express his thoughts. Kat noticed it, but said nothing, although she was pretty sure why he was sticking around her. She gripped the strap on her shoulder and marched beside him at the same pace.

‘Sorry, Dale, you’re not my type’ she decided to lighten the mood a bit, watching as Shane and Rick took a left, closing in on the place they lost Sophia’s trail in the first day.

‘I know’ Dale chuckled ‘Take out twenty to thirty years and give me a crossbow and things would change’ he pointed out the witty remark, continuing to walk at the same pace.

Kat snorted, but tried to hide the curve that was creeping up her lips, tucking the rebel hairs that got into her eyes behind her ear.

‘Not even close’ Kat raised her index finger in front of her, denying Dale’s statement. ‘My type must have the ability of spitting bullets’ she moved her index finger pointing at the rifle dangling on her shoulder, looking at Dale as they took the same turn as Shane and Rick did.

Kat broke away from Dale, following a set of foot prints, but those were too big and too chaotic and looked older than four to five days, mentally labeling it as walkers. She raised her head from the ground, looking around. Weirdly enough, they haven’t seen any walkers so close to the farm yet. Kat turned to voice it out to Dale, but he cut her off with something else.

‘Kat, I know you know. I’ve seen it on your face’ Dale whispered, locking eyes with her. ‘At the funeral.’

Kat kept quiet, holding the eye contact and pressed her lips together in a thin line.

‘This is not okay’ Dale tried to get any reaction out of her. ‘What he did-‘ he grabbed her arm, emphasizing his point.

‘Do you-‘ 

‘Are you-‘

Seeing him try so hard to choose his words, Kat placed her hand on his and pushed it aside.

‘Am I okay with it? Most certainly not’ Kat’s words had an edge she did not intend to let out, but continued ‘Would I do it? I’m not so sure I can say no to that as easily as you’d do, Dale. Carl is alive because Shane brought that bag; whatever happened there.’

‘But you are humane! You saved two strangers without any strings attached. You gave away blood to save the boy. You are searching for a kid you only met for a few hours!’ Dale pleaded, trying to prove his point.

‘And the people I’ve killed in war zones? The innocent people? The people I’ve assassinated, fully knowing what I was doing?’ Kat shouted at him, making him freeze in his tracks. 

‘Yeah, nothing witty to say, right? I see how everyone is looking at me sometimes, like I have some sign on my forehead that says ‘killer’’ she jabbed a finger in front of Dale’s face, before breaking the eye contact, pacing around. 

She sighed, regret washing over her as soon as she realized what she just said. ‘Look’ Kat trailed off, rubbing her cheeks with both her hands, trying to calm down. ‘Dale, I’m not the best person you should talk to about that. I don’t know how I feel about it’ Kat turned around to face him again. 

‘So please don’t turn to me hoping to reason with you about how wrong is to kill people, because you’re judging while being in the white zone while I’m fumbling around trying to figure out this grey one.’ 

Kat kept her distance, teeth sunk in her lower lip as she searched Dale’s expression for any kind of understanding.

Dale nodded, at the loss of words, staring blankly in front of him. He started walking away, but stopped after a few feet away from Kat’s frame.

‘For what it’s worth it, I know that you’re a good person’ he told her over his shoulder, never looking back. Kat threw her head back in defeat as he walked away, wiping away the blood from her lips.

*

Just like the previous search, the one they had organized that day hit the same dead end. The girl seemed to have vanished into thin air, but Kat was still wandering deep into the woods, after the rest of her group went back to the farm for the day. 

She was sincerely hoping Daryl was right and Sophia would be somewhere safe and sound, waiting for them to find her, but her rational side had a different opinion; they were all running around in circles, chasing ghosts.

Kat looked up at the trees, seeing the sunset colors seeping through, marking the end of her rogue search for Sophia. She started walking towards the farm, slowly. Her feet trailed off under her as if her body was against going back and have to face Dale after the stunt she pulled earlier, yelling at him.

A day ago, she would have agreed with him without a second thought, but she would have also made a hypocrite out of herself. She let out a dark chuckle, its bitterness spreading inside her throat, making it hard to breathe. She straightened her back, pushed her chest out, trying to brush the feeling off, and started marching away, continuing her way to the farm.

By the time she arrived, everyone else was already around the farm except for Daryl. Kat didn’t think much about it, going straight to the bag of guns that was still places on the hood of the car; someone was probably waiting for everyone to give their weapons back. Kat removed the strap from her shoulder, shoving the rifle in the bag, next to the other guns. 

Kat kept herself busy for a while, helping T-Dog sharpening a couple of hunting knives for the group out of boredom. 

‘Where’s the rest?’ Kat dragged the blade across the stone in her hand, pausing to gesture widely at nothing in particular.

‘Back in the house’ T-Dog cocked his head in its direction ‘girls want to cook for the farmer’s family, you know, to thank them’ 

‘Then I’m doing my part being riiight here’ Kat trailed off in a sarcastic tone, flipping the knife in her hand to sharpen the other side.

‘Thought so’ T-Dog let out a small chuckle, focusing on the knife in his hands. 

Kat spaced out after a few minutes of silence, her mind replaying the conversation she had with Dale in the woods. She hadn’t even looked in his way ever since she came back earlier, only because she was still confused about the whole situation.

‘Walker. Walker!’ Andrea shouted from the top of the RV, drawing everyone’s attention.

‘I bet I can nail it from here’ the blonde grabbed the and laid on her belly, trying to aim.

‘No no, Andrea. Put the gun down’ Dale pleaded, while Kat and T-Dog stopped sharpening the knives, trying to figure out what was happening.

‘You'd best let us handle this’ Shane shouted while running away.

‘Shane, hold up. Hershel wants to deal with walkers’ Rick yelled after him but started running in the same direction.

Kat dropped the rock to the ground, still holding onto the hunting knife, while her legs seemed to have a mind of their own as she caught herself running after Glenn, sprinting through the field as fast as she could, with T-Dog behind them.

‘What for, man? We got it covered’ Shane yelled as he kept running, making some funny noises Kat didn’t understand, while the rest of them were closing in.

They stopped a few feet away from the walker, with different stages of confusion washing over them. Kat furrowed her brows at the limping figure heading their way, confused if she should still keep her defensive posture or not while Rick aimed his gun in its direction.

‘ _Зайчик_?’ Kat panted, her voice going higher than she intended to, drawing a funny look out of the figure in front of her. 

‘Is that Daryl?’ Glenn echoed her tone, stopping in his tracks as the rest of them.

‘That's the third time ya've pointed that thang at my head. Ya gonna pull the trigger or what?’ Daryl spat in Rick’s direction, sarcasm seeping through.

Kat wouldn’t have been able to react at the next thing that followed, even if she was able to predict the future. The gun shot echoed in her head over and over again, while her vision went blurry. She couldn’t hear anything, a strange feeling like she was suddenly under water washing over her. She saw her arms reaching in front of her on their own, from a point of view that seemed unfamiliar. She felt her body being pushed aside, sending her stumbling to her left, trying to regain her footing. Concrete. A top of a building. Unbearable heat. It all went away, snapping back to reality in the split of a second, Rick’s piercing screams echoing around her.

‘No! No! No!!’ 

Daryl was down. Daryl has been shot. 

Kat watched as Rick and Shane pulled him off the ground, each of Daryl’s arms around their shoulders, carrying him away. 

She heard his voice mumbling something and Kat suddenly remembered how to breathe, her lips felt numb and cold, slightly parted. She turned her head around agonizingly slow, following them with her eyes, only to stop on Andrea’s frame.

Kat watched as Andrea’s lips moved, terror and shame washing over her face, but she couldn’t hear anything. She didn’t want to hear anything. Her senses spiked up at the sudden weight in her right hand and she squeezed the knife’s hilt as if it just materialized there on its own. 

Just as she took the first step towards the woman, Kat felt something grabbing her forearm, then her wrist, snapping her back to reality again. She let go and dropped the knife to the ground, locking eyes with Glenn. The look on his face was enough to make her realize what she was about to do before he stopped her. 

‘I’m okay. I’m okay’ she nodded over and over again, mostly to herself, panting and trying to push back down everything that crept up under her skin.


	7. Interest

Kat was crouched on the floor with her back against the wall, each of her hands hugging her knees to her chest. She refused to eat with everyone downstairs, where you could cut the tension in the air with a knife. Add her aversion towards Andrea for what happened earlier that day, and everything would have been set for failure, pretty much. 

Hershel was not happy about the group deliberately open fire onto his land, even after he thought he made a deal with Rick. He wanted their people to leave, as soon as possible, considering Carl was getting better as the days went on.

She dug her fingernails into the fabric of her cargo pants, the small stings in her skin easing away the unsettling feeling that spread into her chest. The door opened next to her, startling Kat and made her look up to meet Carol’s gaze. She threw Carol a questioning look, but the woman shook her head briefly.

‘Get up and check on him yourself’ Carol gave her a small smile. ‘After that you should come down and eat something, honey’

Kat looked at the hand shoved in her direction, grabbed it and let Carol help her back on her feet. She nodded briefly, not sure if she was able to eat though, but it seemed to appease Carol, because the woman left shortly after hugging Kat.

She opened the door slowly, looking in front of herself, without facing the bed even for a second and took a seat next to Daryl, both back to back, while the man was laying down.

‘Ya’ve been standing there this whole time?’ Daryl broke the silence, blue eyes glued on Kat’s reflection in the window.

Kat nodded but didn’t say anything, making him turn his head in her direction.

‘Glenn told me. ‘t was a mistake’ he stated drily, Kat knowing fully well what he was talking about. Glenn must have told him about how he stopped her from pouncing on Andrea, after the woman shot him, but the bullet only grazed him, fortunately.

The silence settled in once again. Kat took a deep breath with her eyes glued to her hands, caressing her gloved palm with her fingers.

‘When I saw you and I heard the gun shot’ she trailed off, breaking the silence, but stopped after the words rolled off her tongue. 

‘It deafened me. I was back there again’

Daryl pushed his body against the mattress, adjusting his position so he could fully face Kat’s back, making her shift uncomfortably next to him. 

‘In Tajikistan. My.. partner and I were deployed there in order to stop – ’ Kat went silent again, a bitter tone lacing her words as she tried to find the strength to talk ‘In order to take out the leaders of the rebellion, to put a stop to it, to cripple their beliefs. Under direct unofficial orders, no trace of paperwork, nothing’

She stopped briefly, a small chuckle crawling up her throat. 

‘We were out there for two days already, on top of a concrete building, which we deemed abandoned. That was our biggest mistake. One of our targets finally came out and I had a clear shot. I was ready to pull the trigger, when everything started crumbling in chaos. Dust and rubble flying everywhere and I looked at my partner, trying to make sense of what was happening. But he was just laying there next to me, his body lax, not a single movement. Then I noticed the blood pooling under his body, slowly flowing towards me.’ Kat took a deep breath to steady her voice.

‘They had snipers of their own, targeting us already it seemed, taking their shot as soon as they had the chance. Bastards blew us up at the same time. At that time, I didn’t register any gun shot, no explosion, nothing. But it came back to me every time I closed my eyes, shortly after I managed to get away’ Kat continued to absently caress the fabric covering her hands. 

‘I couldn’t take him away from there. But during those two days we spent there..’ Kat raised her left hand up ‘My partner gave me his gloves, because I couldn’t get a good grip with my own’ 

She moved her head to her left, finally making eye contact with Daryl. She didn’t see any pity on his expression, no judgmental, condemnatory look, nothing, except for the fact that he was listening to her. He was giving her closure in his own way.

‘When I heard the gun shot earlier and I saw you fall down, I felt like I lost a partner – ‘ Kat shook her head, her voice turning to a whisper ‘ _My partner_ , all over again.’

Daryl kept her gaze, keeping silent for a while. He watched her change position, shifting her body so she could face him, with one leg under her and the other dangling over the edge of the bed. Kat reached her hand slowly to his head, green eyes glued on the clean bandages. She trailed her fingertips across them, afraid to apply more pressure and creating more discomfort to the man laying in front of her.

‘It’s just a graze’ Daryl whispered on a slightly soothing tone, drawing the tiniest of smiles out of her. 

She rested the palm of her hand on the side of his head, absently caressing his hair, fingertips between the strands of short hair massaging the scalp, not thinking if it was appropriate or not, not even considering if Daryl would be okay with the small gesture of intimacy or not. But he didn’t push her hand away, he didn’t even flinch at her touch. She needed this. She needed to feel him, to feel that he was there, alive and well. 

And he let her take him in, he let her feel that he was right there, safe and sound, next to her. The small gesture of intimacy was strange for Daryl, but oddly calming. Kat’s touch triggered something inside him, something he had never felt before. She cared for him. It wasn’t that he was the object of her closure, as she made it sound. Daryl didn’t hear that. He felt it, he felt the fear in her voice, he felt the anxiety that washed over her at the thought of losing him too.

‘I’m here.’ 

It came out as a hoarse whisper, as if it wasn’t his voice, his own lips moving without thinking.

Before he was able to blame it on the painkillers Hershel made him take, Kat’s green eyes glazed over with unspilled tears she didn’t know she had, while her fingers moved to the top of Daryl’s head, flattening his short hair by caressing it over and over again. She parted her lips trying to answer but nothing came out. Kat settled for a short nod, while her tears spilled over, dampening her cheeks. 

He watched her silently, unable to react at the crying woman next to him. Any type of comforting was suddenly forgotten, unknown to him in that moment. He bit the inside of his lower lip, watching her tears fall over the stitches on her cheekbone, trying to figure out how to comfort her. Daryl held out his right hand slowly, as if not to startle her, and kept it there. 

Kat’s eyes never left his, but she understood the small comforting gesture Daryl was offering. She raised her left hand, slowly caressing the inside of Daryl’s palm upwards with her fingertips, feeling its heat, its callousness, until she pushed her delicate fingers between his. She squeezed his hand in a comforting way and he did the same, drawing a shaky sob out of her. Kat lowered her head, resting her forehead on their intertwined fingers, the rebel strands of grey hair falling around her face. 

‘You're here’ she whispered, forehead still pressed on their hands, while rocking slowly back and forth, not mourning a loss, but feeling relief flooding her entire being. 

*

Somehow, she must have overslept, because the heat inside the tent was unbearable, even if Daryl helped her setting it in a shaded spot. Without opening her eyes yet, Kat tried to recollect what happened the night before, the feeling of Daryl’s hand in hers still lingering. They had a small, intimate, _real moment_ , thing that she didn’t think any of them were capable of. 

A warm smile crept up her face, as she pressed it against the bag she has been using as a pillow for the past few nights, but her mood shattered quickly at the movement and voices coming from outside her tent.

Kat flipped on her back, the hard texture of her makeshift bed making her miss the real deal. She pushed the blanket Maggie offered her to keep her warm at night and followed her routine, fastening her countless belts around her hips and thigh, a bit bothered that she had slept fully clothed. Unzipping the tent on her way out, her ears caught the conversation happening a few feet away from her.

‘I'm so sorry. l feel like shit.’ 

Kat recognized Andrea’s voice before even looking in her way. The blonde was in front of Daryl’s tent, apologizing for what she did the day before, suddenly uncomfortable after noticing Kat’s frame emerging from the tent. 

‘Yeah, you and me both.’ 

Daryl’s voice carried out, answering Andrea’s apology with sarcasm laced words.

Andrea watched Kat standing in front of her tent but moved her attention to Daryl again.

‘l don't expect either of you to forgive me, but if there's anything l can do...’

There was a small pause coming from Daryl, probably wondering what Andrea meant by ‘either of you’. Kat on the other hand, understood the blonde’s words, a bit ashamed at the way she reacted the other day.

‘Ya were tryin’ to protect the group. We're good. But hey, shoot me again, ya'd best pray l'm dead.’ 

The blonde nodded without another word, with a guilty smile plastered on her face and started walking in Kat’s direction, briefly stopping in front of her. Kat kept herself busy working on the belt around her hips, watching the woman having an internal debate in front of her.

‘I’m sorry’ Kat was the first to break the silence, biting the inside of her cheek.

Andrea settled for a quick nod at her words. The blonde briefly remembered Kat coming her way while the others carried Daryl to the house, the hunting knife in her hand and the way Kat looked at her, stone cold expression on her face, but Kat’s eyes were the most frightening part, glazing over with raw killing intent. 

‘I have some demons of my own’ Kat continued, her voice taking on a more apologetic tone. 

‘We all do’ Andrea bit her lips, trying to find a less awkward way to face Kat. 

‘We good?’ 

‘I have no intent to piss off either of you ever again’ the blonde cocked her head at Daryl’s tent, the usual tone taking over in the split of a second. 

‘So yes, we’re good’. Andrea smiled, the awkwardness of the situation quickly fading away, as soon as she saw the remorse in Kat’s eyes.

After Andrea left, Kat took a few steps towards Daryl’s tent, stopping in front of the entrance. She nodded at the man laying inside, as she took out the almost empty pack of Morley’s and placed one between her lips, before throwing the last but one left, inside the tent.

Daryl dropped the book he was holding on to, picking up the cigarette from his bandaged chest and looked in Kat’s way as she lit hers up.

‘Making me eat shit, give me a spoon too’ Daryl cracked the joke on his ever-present sarcastic tone, drawing a small chuckle out of her.

Kat crouched at the tent’s entrance, holding out her hand for him to give back the cigarette so she’d light it up for him. Daryl’s fingers brushed briefly against hers and they both locked eyes when it happened, making her pucker her lips in a silly way that Daryl found oddly amusing. Kat held her already burning cigarette outside of the tent, placing his between her smiling lips, lighting it up. She took a small drag out of it after the lighter flickered at the other end and offered it back to a smirking Daryl. He held out his arm, with his palm facing up this time, but didn’t take the cigarette from between her fingers.

‘There. Shit, spoon and all’ Kat grinned at him, their fingertips slightly touching, cigarette burning, forgotten between her fingers.

*

The day passed quickly and uneventful, sunset already basking the field in an orange shade. Kat kept watch and made the occasional quick trips to Daryl’s tent that she and Carol agreed upon, in order to check up on him and to see if he needed anything else. 

Andrea and Shane continued the search for Sophia, which Kat insisted on joining, but as soon as she found out who was going, she brushed it off quickly. She was still trying to process how she felt towards Shane, the man was still giving her the creeps. 

But now she was being restless, waiting for Glenn and Maggie to come back with whatever cigarettes they could find. Kat had smoked the last one, hours ago and the lack of nicotine was taking its toll on her. A great addiction to have in the apocalypse.

As she was mentally patting herself on the back for her own stupidity, she saw the horses heading their way, both Maggie and Glenn safe and sound. Kat had started to grow very fond of those two, especially Glenn, considering that he was the one that stopped her from murdering Andrea in cold blood when she lost it that day.

She jumped off the RV’s roof that was slowly becoming her second home, in order to greet them. With her arms extended towards the bags they were carrying, Kat closed the distance between them, waiting for them to get off the horses. 

‘Goodies?’ Kat pinched Glenn’s cheeks as soon as he hopped off the horse, playful attitude dropped as soon as she saw the blood on Maggie’s shirt.

‘She was attacked.’ Glenn spoke on a concerned tone, eyeing the blood splattered across her shirt.

‘Are you guys all right?’ Kat turned her attention to Maggie, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder, searching for any kind of wounds on her body.

‘lt was pretty close’ Maggie concluded, visibly shaken.

‘I'm so sorry. l should never have asked you to go.’ Lori’s expression was a mix of guilt and shame, as she ran towards the small group.

Glenn took a small pharmacy bag out of the backpack, giving it to Lori while trying to calm her down, as both him and Maggie were safe and they actually offered to make the run. Kat eyed the small bag in Lori’s hands, but didn’t give it a second thought, as Maggie made a loud ‘ta-dah’ noise, while ceremoniously pulling out a whole Morley’s twenty packs bag.

‘Have I ever told you that you’re the love of my life, _милая_?’ Kat tried to pounce on her, while eyeing the cigarette packs, but Maggie turned quickly, making Kat bump against her back with her arms around her shoulders. 

Accidentally hugging Maggie, Kat started tickling her playfully while reaching an arm out to grab the bag from her hand. The girl tried to say she gives up between fits of laughter, but still keeping the packs out of Kat’s reach, until the bag was pulled away, making both of them freeze.

‘Stop screwing around’ Daryl’s voice made both of them snap back to reality, while he tore the plastic off.

Kat hugged Maggie’s waist, placing her chin on the girl’s shoulder.

‘Should I rather screw you?’ Kat purred in Daryl’s direction without a second thought, locking eyes with him. Maggie started laughing again, trying to get away from Kat’s hug, clawing at the arms around her waist unsuccessfully.

Glenn’s voice echoed from somewhere behind them, calling out to god to make him forget what he just heard, while the only reaction Kat registered was Daryl’s cocked eyebrow and the squinting look he was giving her.

‘Part of the interest.’ 

A smirk that Kat hadn’t seen him show until then crept up on his face, while he lighted up a cigarette, before limping back to his tent.


	8. Baby Cakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, it's so hard to keep S1!Daryl into character. I did my best though, any suggestion is much appreciated! (づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ

Kat didn’t expect Daryl to call out her bluff in the open like that, so after he left, she let go of Maggie and took the bag of cigarettes he left behind. Fishing one pack out of it, Kat turned around to face Maggie again, only to be met by a devilish smile directed at her. 

‘What?’ Kat rolled her eyes, placing a cigarette between her lips, trying to ignore Maggie’s curious look but happy that she managed to change the girl’s mood with her shenanigans.

‘You and the hunter?’ Maggie puckered up her lips into a kissy face that Kat found unbearably amusing, grabbing the woman’s cheeks between her thumb and fingers.

‘You and Glenn?’ Kat whispered to her, their faces inches away, watching as Maggie’s cheeks turned a few shades pinker.

‘Oh come on, I ain’t blind, _милая_ ’ Kat grinned somewhere behind Maggie, drawing Glenn’s attention. ‘I’ve been seeing you disappearing together, like last night’

Kat’s teasing didn’t get the reaction she had been expecting, with both Glenn and Maggie freezing in their tracks. Kat noticed it right away, bringing her thin eyebrows together, frowning at the two as she let go of Maggie’s cheeks.

‘What happened?’

Her question was met with silence, both of the people in front of her exchanging concerned looks, but on a different scale. Maggie’s was more like a silent warning, while Glenn seemed to feel trapped. Kat crossed her arms against her chest, puffing on the cigarette while studying the looks on their faces.

‘Nothing to worry about’ Glenn finally answered, however Kat met that conclusion with skepticism. 

‘Both of you, you know you can rely on me, right?’ Kat seemed to start doubting the bond they created for the past few days. Sure, it wasn’t long but these weren’t normal circumstances either. She trusted both of them enough so she could sleep at night, which meant a lot to her. 

Glenn threw Maggie a pleading look, after seeing the internal conflict unraveling on Kat’s face, but the girl shook her head, walking away from them.

He watched her leave, taking off his hat and brushed a hand through his hair, the pleading look on his face never faltering. Glenn turned to face Kat and placed a hand on her crossed arms, patting them a couple of times.

‘I won’t buy that, because I know bullshit when I hear it’ Kat starred at Glenn’s figure, towering over him. 

‘But at the same time, I trust you. I trust that you won’t go around doing some stupid shit, endangering any of us’ Kat placed a hand on the top of his head, ruffling his slicked back hair and left to reclaim the top of the RV, but failed to see the guilt on Glenn’s look.

Kat noticed that Shane and Andrea were already back, as the blonde rushed past her with Lori, with what seemed like hickeys all over her neck. Kat threw her an incredulous look, a grin spreading across her lips as she realized what she did, or who she did, while Andrea’s eyes widened in her direction before breaking the eye contact completely.

A bit relieved that she decided not to go search for Sophia with the two of them, avoiding a really uncomfortable third wheel type of situation, Kat was about to hop on the top of the RV to resume her shift. She stopped with her hand already on the metal ladder, her ears catching a part of Dale’s conversation with Shane.

She was starting to develop this bad habit, listening to the private conversations happening around her lately, habit she wasn’t really fond of.

‘You had him in your sights and you held him there. I know what kind of man you are’ Dale’s voice carried, making Kat’s walk slowly in their direction before stopping a few feet away from the two men.

‘You think I'd shoot Rick? That is my best friend. That's the man that I love. I love him like he's my brother. You think that's the kind of man I am?’

‘That's right.’

‘Well, maybe we ought to just think that through. Say I'm the kind of man who'd gun down his own best friend. What do you think I'd do to some guy that I don't even like when he starts throwing accusations my way?’ 

Shane spat the words in Dale’s face, none of them noticing Kat’s frame lingering a few feet away from them. The man backed away from Dale, only to be met by a pair of amber eyes staring down at him. Dale turned his head to see what got Shane distracted, unable to move away from the man.

Kat’s lips pressed into a thin line while her hands were already gripping the hilts of her hunting knives in a silent warning. Her jaw was painfully tensed, trying to figure out how a direct confrontation would go with Dale standing right there between them.

She locked eyes with him, cocking her head to the right, signaling to the old man to get away from there. Shane scoffed, but didn’t engage in anything anymore, throwing his arms up at the two people in front of him, visibly on edge, before he stomped away. 

Kat caught herself exhaling as soon as the man left, a small sense of relief spreading through her chest. She let go of her knives, dropping her arms to her sides.

‘What was that?’ 

Dale shook his head and wanted to walk away, to get away from there as soon as he could, but Kat grabbed his arm and stopped him.

‘Dale. That was a clear as day threat. What. Was. That?’

‘Kat, Shane stepped in that metaphorical black zone of yours. Stay away from him. Everyone should.’

Dale left without another word, yanking away his arm from Kat’s grip, leaving her to process what she just heard from both men, trying to figure out the best way to handle the situation.

*

Kat was in dire need of some alone time as she ended her shift, whistling to the group gathered outside for dinner to send someone else in her place. She hopped off the RV as soon as she saw Glenn heading her way, the soles of her combat boots making a loud thud as they touched the ground, raising dust and dirt around her.

‘Honey, come eat something’ Carol’s voice chirped, making most of the group look at Kat’s frame.

‘Нет, спасибо, I’ve lost my appetite earlier’ 

Kat spat the words in Shane’s face as she passed by him, heading straight for her tent. The man curled his upper lip in slight annoyance, but continued eating his meal, ignoring the questioning looks the others were throwing at him.

Carol left her seat and caught up with Kat halfway to her tent, stopping her in her tracks and pushed a full plate in her face. The short haired woman raised an eyebrow, silently daring Kat to say no again. 

‘Eat. And it’s not just for you.’ Carol looked briefly towards the second tent that was set in the direction Kat was walking before she stopped her.

Kat sighed with a defeated look on her face, mentally waving at the much needed alone time, but taking the plate from Carol. The woman flashed a satisfied smile at the sudden emptiness in her hands, turning on her heels and walking away back to the group, leaving Kat to pick at the grilled meat on her plate.

Kat’s stomach growled unceremoniously at the mouthwatering aromas, picking up a thin slice of whatever animal they had cooked and biting down on it as she made her way to Daryl’s tent.

‘Oi, baby cakes. You up?’

Kat stopped in front of Daryl’s zipped tent, holding the plate in one hand. She continued to chew on the piece of meat, eyeing the closed door for a few seconds, before she saw it being unzipped slowly. 

Daryl pushed the flappy fabric to his left, cocking an eyebrow at Kat’s standing frame, with an incredulous look on his face. Daryl’s eye twitched at the nickname, not being sure how to dodge it.

‘Baby cakes?’

‘Mhm’ she hummed in agreement, still chewing the hell out of that piece of meat, wondering what in the world they cooked back there.

‘Ya gonna keep me like this or what?’ Daryl’s voice trailed off, making Kat stare down at the uncomfortable position he was crouched in, the bandages on his chest applying pressure to the wound, dampening the white wrap on his side with fresh red spots.

‘Move over, munchkin’ Kat spoke with her mouth full, cocking her head to the side. ‘Momma Carol sent me over.’

Daryl rolled his eyes at the new nickname, but laid back into a somewhat sitting position with his legs crossed to the side, after stacking up the two pillows the farm girl brought him the day before. He watched amused as Kat crouched, butt first into his tent, ducking away unsuccessfully, swearing in Russian as she untangled long strands of hair out of the tent’s zipper with one hand.

Patting the messy locks behind her ears, Kat turned to her left to face him only to be met by a deadpanned but slightly amused look. The man rarely let his expression betray any kind of emotion except for his caustic squinting and scowling thrown left and right, but as soon as there was even the tiniest change, Kat would notice it, making mental notes about what makes him tick. It was a fun little thing she kept track of lately, using all those weird-ass, cringy nicknames that normally she wouldn’t touch even with a ten foot pole.

‘What? Eat.’ Kat placed the still full plate between them, trying to understand the funny looks he gave her.

Daryl picked up something that resembled a lightly burnt chicken leg, biting down on it and tearing the cooked meat off the bone with ease. 

‘How’re you feeling?’ Kat kept her feet outside the tent, hugging her bent knees to her chest with one arm, lightly rocking back and forth, picking up a piece of grilled eggplant before scowling at it and set it back on the plate. 

‘Hurts like a bitch’ Daryl answered with his mouth still full, before swallowing and threw aside the meatless bone. He picked up the same piece of grilled eggplant Kat threw back on the plate in disgust, and shoved it in his mouth, only to be met by an almost nauseated scowl on Kat’s face.

‘How bout ya?’ Daryl licked his fingers clean one by one, waiting for her to answer.

Kat caught herself watching his mouth with more interest than she should have. Clearing her throat and breaking her eyes away from the way Daryl licked his fingers, she raised and dropped her shoulders in a small shrug.

She bit down on her fingernail, eyes lost somewhere in front of her, outside the tent, deciding if she should tell him about Dale and Shane’s conversation. ‘Something’s going on between Maggie and Glenn. Besides the obvious’ Kat rolled her eyes, gesturing widely in front of her.

‘The obvious?’

Kat snapped her head in Daryl’s direction, a wide grin spreading across her face.

‘They’re hooking up. Doing the dirty. Screwing around.’ Kat raised her eyebrows a couple of times, the grin still on her lips. 

‘Can’t wrap my head around ya. One moment there ya are with that shit eating grin of yours, spitting nonsense and the next second – ’ Daryl’s mumbled a bit annoyed, gesturing at the half empty plate with his elbow. 

Kat’s grin faded away slowly, until it was just a small smile. She wrapped her other arm around her legs and rested her head on her knees, right cheek brushing against the fabric of her cargo pants. She watched him for a while, none of them breaking the silence. She was aware of the mixed signals she was giving left and right. 

‘I don’t remember how to act around someone that –’ she trailed off, lazily pushing the heels of her boots against the ground. ‘Someone that I care about.’

Kat took his silence as her cue and let go of her knees, pushing the heel of her palms against the soft blanket she sat on, ready to get up.

‘Me neither.’ Daryl’s mumble stopped her in her tracks, arms still pushing against the ground. 

Kat watched him throw his head against the pillows, glaring absently at the seams inside the tent, a deep frown roughening the lines on his sunburnt face before she felt his fingers wrapping loosely around her delicate wrist. She let herself fall back into the same place as before, carefully moving her hand, afraid he’d let go, until she slipped her fingers under his arm, mirroring his gesture. Wrapping her fingers around his wrist, their palms touched the inside of each other’s forearms. Kat bit her lower lip at the strange way they were holding hands, smiling at the warm feeling spreading inside her chest. 

‘But baby cakes, really?’ The corners of his lips twitched into a smug smirk, thinking at the outrageous nickname.


	9. The missing piece

Nothing could have prepared her for what was about to happen that day. She knew that this would be the result, but she hoped it would be in different outlines. 

Kat woke up as the stray rays of light bothered the hell out of her and without opening her eyes she tried to remember if she had closed the zipper last night. When she got to her tent. Weirdly, she had no recollection of walking to her tent, except for the fact that she passed by it with a plate in her hands, going to Daryl. Daryl’s tent. 

She opened her eyes slowly, trying to convince herself that she was in fact, sleeping in her own tent. But the hand she was holding onto twitched, calloused fingers tracing random patterns on her wrist. Kat sighed in content at the feeling, closing her eyes shut, taking in as much as she could.

‘You’ll have one hell of a back pain’ Daryl’s voice was low, almost a whisper, as he continued to move his fingertips across the sensitive skin on her writs.

Kat hummed at the feeling, postponing the inevitable start of a new day as much as she could. Her senses were slowly waking up and she opened her eyes again, noticing the light coming through the zipped net.

‘Had a bit of a trouble zipping it up, as your lazy ass wouldn’t budge from where you fell asleep’ his voice was so soothing, compared to how he called her a ‘lazy ass’, making Kat chuckle lightly.

Daryl watched over her small frame, all curled up at the end of his makeshift bed, close enough so they could have slept like this through the whole night. He continued to trace the veins on her wrist, feeling every bump and every line over and over again, his fingertips brushing softly over the raised healed skin that he deemed to be old battle scars.

She tried to push herself into a sitting position with her free arm, but only managed to prop onto her elbow in a weird position, facing Daryl. Kat felt the mild pain spreading through her bones as she changed positions. From what she could figure out, she slept curled up into a ball, in the same spot she sat last night, holding hands with Daryl.

But she forgot all about the pain at the sight in front of her. Daryl was still laying down on his back, looking at her, eyes glazed over with something she couldn’t put her finger on, but it sent sparks of electricity through her entire body. It was pure and intimate and made her feel safer than she ever felt in her entire life. 

Daryl mirrored silently what she felt in that moment, watching in awe how her ruffled strands of hair fell around her face framing her cheeks, how her disheveled braid looped around itself next to her, how she used her arm as a pillow, the same arm she held out to hold his wrist with. 

‘We should get up’ Kat’s voice broke the silence, sleepy eyes blinking lazily, still glued on Daryl’s face.

‘Right.’

Kat was the first one to leave the tent, turning around and holding out her right arm to help Daryl on his feet. The man grabbed her forearm, mimicking a roman handshake, nodding at Kat as he felt her fingers wrap around his arm, her nails digging gently in the skin as she pulled him up. 

Everyone seemed to be up and about, with the two of them being the last ones to join and their group was complete. Kat noticed Carl had joined them as well, the boy’s rosy cheeks puffed on a mouthful of scrambled eggs. 

Kat gave a small good morning to the group, still rubbing the lazy feeling out of her eyes as she lead Daryl to a camping chair. She saw Rick drawing Carl’s attention, pointing towards her. The boy left his plate on Lori’s lap and headed in Kat’s way. His little arms circled her waist and Kat patted his hat back in place as the boy looked up at her.

‘Thank you. Dad said you helped me’ 

Kat reached down, gently circling her arms around the small frame in front of her and picked the boy up in her arms. She flicked her fingers at Carl’s hat as she brought them both at eye level, pushing it back so they could be face to face.

‘And I’d do it all over again, big guy.’ Kat pinched the boy’s cheek, making him jerk away from her playfully. ‘Now go and finish your breakfast.’

Kat let the boy back down, grunting in the process, while she held her right hand on the small of her back, massaging the bare skin softly. 

‘Carl, let Kat rest. She had a busy night.’ 

Rick’s amused tone drew some small chuckles from the people gathered around for breakfast, making Kat look around until she and Daryl locked eyes, sharing a confused look. She circled back to Carol and she was met by a plate of scrambled eggs. Cocking a questioning eyebrow at the woman, Kat took the plate and tilted her head waiting for an answer.

‘I came by earlier to wake you up for breakfast.’ Carol pressed her lips in a thin line, trying to hide the smile that was creeping up her face, searching for any reaction out of Kat.

Kat’s cheeks went from her usual pale complexion to a bright pink, spreading all over her freckled face. She snapped her head at Daryl only to see the smug smirk he was sporting on his face, chewing away on his breakfast silently. Before Kat could think of a witty comeback, Glenn’s voice covered the chuckles going around.

‘Um, guys. So... The barn is full of walkers.’

Kat eyes left Glenn’s frame and glued on Maggie’s figure, out on the porch, a deep frown on the girl’s face directed at them. Kat snapped her attention back to the group, as everyone was leaving their still full plates around the camp, running towards the barn.

Kat on the other hand kept a slow pace, walking in front of Daryl and Carol, knowing the man wasn’t able to run like crazy just yet. She turned her head around, giving a concerned side stare towards the two people following her, meeting Daryl’s eyes. 

‘That’s the thing ya sniffed around yesterday.’ It wasn’t a question, but the gravity of the situation made her feel it was an understatement.

‘It surely seems so.’

As they reached the group, all of them froze in front of the barn. A shouting match broke loose between Rick and Shane, drawing the walkers inside to the locked doors. The chains and locks started rattling, the metallic noise being accompanied by loud growls.

‘Okay, we've either got to go in there, we've got to make things right or we've just got to go. Now we have been talking about fort Benning for a long time.’

Shane was pacing around in front of the barn, visibly distressed and all of them knew the danger they had been exposed to. Not knowing, sleeping for all those nights right next to a ticking bomb, death has been just a rusty, chained up lock away, literally. 

‘We can't go.’ Rick shouted back, concern all over his face.

‘Why, Rick? Why?’

‘Because my daughter is still out there.’ Carol’s pleading voice drew everyone’s attention as a sudden grim reminder that the girl was in fact still missing, even after all they had searched left and right.

‘Okay. Okay, I think it's time that we all start to just consider the other possibility.’ Shane continued to pace around irritated while Kat tried to catch his attention, shaking her head firmly, trying to stop him from saying what he wanted to voice out loud.

‘We're not leaving Sophia behind. I'm close to finding this girl. I just found her damn doll two days ago.’ Daryl pushed past her, yelling at Shane to stop his nonsense while closing in on him. 

‘You found her doll, Daryl. That's what you did. You found a doll.’

Kat didn’t like where the current situation was going, being both afraid of calling out the truth and a possible fight starting right there because of it. 

‘Ya don't know what the hell ya're talking about.’ 

‘Let me tell you something else, man. If she was alive out there and saw you coming all methed out with your buck knife and geek ears around your neck, she would run in the other direction!’

Kat watched Daryl heading towards Shane, with his fist already balled up, ready to swing into the other man’s jaw. Acting on pure instinct, both her and Rick got themselves in between, trying to separate them, to push them apart before it escalated into an all-out brawl.

‘Back off!‘ Kat shouted while pushing Shane away from Daryl, the heel of her palm digging deep into his stomach until she felt him backing away on his own. Kat walked back to the Daryl, while the others continued to shout around them.

‘Hey, hey!’ she drew his attention, placing a hand on his forearm, but he jerked it away. Kat blamed it on the adrenaline, brushing it off quickly. She reached her hand out again, grabbing his wrist this time. ‘Easy. Listen. You go, search for Sophia, okay?’

She looked both Daryl and Carol in the eye, nodding slowly, with a questioning look on her face. Carol mirrored her nod, agreeing with the plan, but her eyes were already filled with tears. Kat bit down on her lower lip in frustration. She knew Shane was right, but it was an awful thing to say nonetheless.

‘Good?’ The question was directed at Daryl, who did not pull away his arm this time. ‘I’ll stay here today. I’ll keep watch, moving my shift here. Good?’

He nodded after a few seconds, his eyes moving from Kat’s face to Shane, a deep frown darkening his eyes. Kat let go of his wrist, letting his arm fall back next to his body, before turning to Rick.

‘Rick. Go, do whatever you want to do, but this?’ Kat threw her arm towards the barn to emphasize her point, closing the distance between her and the group. ‘This is madness.’

She dropped her arm, her fingers patting absently the hilt of her hunting knife.

‘Until you talk some sense into Hershel, we need to keep watch. No more screwing around. Alright?’ Kat looked up at the man towering over her, but she didn’t back away, waiting for his approval. 

‘Fine. But no guns. It’s his land.’ Rick looked around at the group, reminding them the rule Hershel enforced. 

Kat’s scoff turned to an incredulous laughter as she raised her eyebrows in disbelief. She took a couple of steps towards Rick, pointing again at the barn.

‘So, in case hell breaks loose’ Kat jabbed her finger at the rattling chains, facing Rick. ‘I guess I should defend myself with two hunting knives against what? Ten? Twenty? Thirty walkers?’ 

Rick closed the distance between them, looking down at Kat, his face only inches apart from her scowling one.

‘Kat. No. Guns.’ 

She held his stare for a few seconds, pushing her eyebrows together in a deep frown. Her lip twitched upwards, as she snapped her head to the side, breathing out. 

‘Fine.’

*

Kat marched around the barn all day, out in the sun, checking and double checking all the doors, locks and chains like clockwork, chain-smoking an entire pack of cigarettes. At some point, Glenn came and tried to convince her to switch with him, but she refused vehemently, sending him back to the camp in the blink of an eye.

Aside the obvious fact that she felt thrown in the lion’s den with this barn full of walkers a few feet away from where she slept, from where their camp was set, Kat was more or less feeling guilty that she hadn’t went to help search for Sophia with the rest of them. So she pushed herself to do what she could do for the group.

Shane swung by shortly after as well, circling the barn for a few times but avoiding any interactions with Kat as much as he could. After he finished the second lap, he threw his dark blue cap at her, bobbing his head in her direction to put it on.

‘If you don’t go down with a heatstroke, you’ll surely get sunburnt.’

Kat caught it with both her hands, reading the letters spelling out ‘police’ absently. If Shane was suddenly humane to her with no other soul around, he was surely after something. She put the cap on, taking her braid out through the small hole at the back, tongue darting over the front of her teeth with her lips closed, refraining from asking anything. 

Shane nodded, standing in the same spot for a few seconds before leaving without another word, thing that surprised Kat if anything. 

‘Guess I can be wrong sometimes.’ 

She laughed it off, still not entirely sure what that was, because it wasn’t a peace offering for sure. The tension between them didn’t go away as the days passed, ever since what happened back on the highway. It was postponed, if anything, and Kat was waiting for that _something_ to happen, anything to pop the lid back open and make Shane snap at her.

But it was not long after Shane had left, that Kat noticed him marching through the field towards the house with the bag of guns in his hands, distributing rifles and shotguns left and right to whomever was willing to take them. 

She started running towards the group gathered in front of the house, seeing Daryl and Carol coming back empty handed from their search. Again. 

‘You with me, man?’ 

Shane held out a shotgun towards Daryl, the latter grabbing it without another word.

‘Oi, what are you doing? What’s with the guns?’ Kat pushed past T-Dog, making space for her to jump in front of Shane.

‘What’s with the guns?’ Shane echoed her question ironically, with his eyes glued to the bag in his hands. ‘Time to grow up. This one’s yours, right?’ 

Kat watched as he took her M16 out of the bag, holding it in front of her. Shane nodded, encouraging her to take it, before he would go around and give it to someone else. She reached her arm in front of her and grabbed the strap first, fingers sliding slowly down the cartridge clip, before she secured them tightly around its grip.

‘Look, it was one thing sitting around here picking daisies when we thought this place was supposed to be safe. But now we know it ain't.’ Shane gestured broadly while he talked to the dumbfounded group around him.

Kat searched for Daryl’s eyes, looking for any signs of internal struggle at what Shane was pushing them to do. Piercing blue eyes found hers in the split of a second just as she turned her head. Daryl bit the inside of his lower lip, nodding, silently agreeing with what they were about to do, no sign of remorse darkening his sunburnt face.

‘Can you stop? You do this, you hand out these guns, my dad will make you leave tonight!’ Maggie screamed at him, trying to reason in the chaos Shane was creating.

‘Now look, Hershel, he's just gotta understand. Well, he's gonna have to.’ Shane dropped the bag on the porch next to Maggie, pushing past the group towards the barn.

‘ _Ох блин_!’ 

Kat’s swearing drew the attention of the group, all heads turning around, looking across the field only to see Hershel and Rick leading two walkers to the barn, using Jimmy as live bait. She started running towards them without a second thought, appalled at the ridiculousness unfolding in front of them. _What the hell was Rick thinking?_

‘What the hell are you doing?’ Shane yelled out, voicing her thoughts as they stopped in front of the barn, all eyes frozen on the two growling walkers being pushed their way, every one of them being too shocked to react.

Kat’s knuckles turned white, gripping the rifle with both her hands as she listened to the pain and horror in Hershel’s voice while the man tried to explain his way of saving the walkers. He called them _family and friends_. Kat looked at the old man with sympathy if anything, he did truly believe they were sick. 

‘These things ain't sick. They're not people. They're dead. Ain't gonna feel nothing for them 'cause all they do, they kill! These things right here, they're the things that killed Amy. They killed Otis. They're gonna kill all of us.’ 

Shane has lost his temper entirely, howling the words at the men in front of him. Then his arm raised in front of him, gun aimed at the walker Hershel was trying to keep steady. He pulled the trigger three times, making the creature jerk in the snare pole, but it kept trying to claw at Shane’s figure.

‘Could someone who's alive, could they just take that?! Why is it still coming?’ Shane pulled the trigger again. ‘That's its heart, its lungs. Why is it still coming?’ And again.

‘Shane, enough!‘ 

Shane walked towards the walker, putting a bullet straight to its head, watching it fall to the ground.

‘Yeah, you're right, man. That is enough. Enough risking our lives for a little girl who's gone! Enough living next to a barn full of things that are trying to kill us. Enough. Rick, it ain't like it was before! Now if y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you got to fight for it! I'm talking about fighting right here, right now. ‘

Kat tuned out all the shouting and yelling around her, watching Shane go straight for the barn. Everything around her slowed down as she raised the rifle towards the barn, ready to aim as soon as Shane broke the chains. She held her breath and pressed her cheek against the cold metal, as the first walker left the barn.

She pulled the trigger without blinking, watching as the bullet went clean through the walker’s skull before it fell face first to the ground and aimed at the next one coming out. Just as her finger was about to twitch on the trigger, she saw the top of its head explode, making her look to her right. Daryl was next to her, with his shotgun aimed at the barn, his muscles tensed at the kickback, glistening under a thin layer of sweat.

In that split of a second and out of nowhere, Kat knew. She felt something similar to an adrenaline rush running through her body, twirling around inside her chest and spreading to every cell of her being. _This was it_. He was the partner she never realized she was searching for all along. Daryl was the missing piece she never knew she needed. 

Her lips twitched into a small smile as she pulled the trigger again, watching the bodies drop one after the other, pilling up at the barn’s entrance. She dropped the rifle to her side, exhaling deeply and kept her eyes glued to the wooden doors. A single growl echoed from inside and Kat was about to get in position again, but her arms froze midway, as the small figure pushed through the doors.

Carol’s heartbreaking cry sent shivers down her spine, catching a glimpse of her frail body being held down by Daryl right next to her. But she couldn’t tear her eyes away from the barn. Kat shook her head in disbelief, watching the shell of what was once Sophia limping in their direction, before Rick pushed past her, gun in his hand, delivering the only gunshot that made her flinch that day.


	10. To hell and back

The beads of sweat rolled off from under the hat, down her temples, dampening the hair already stuck to her forehead. Her feet were digging deep into the soil, her arms moved mechanically, pushing the shovel into the ground and throwing the dirt out of the small grave, as she tried to stop the quiver taking over her lower lip. Kat buried the shovel into the ground one last time, steading herself holding onto its grip. She pushed the cap up with the back of her hand, wiping away the sweat on her forehead.

‘It’s done.’

T-Dog held out his good arm, helping her out of the grave she had dug. Kat dusted herself off, watching the hardened dirt stuck to her clothes still clinging to the damp fabric of her cargo pants. She looked around, silently watching the freshly dug graves spreading in front of her. 

Dropping in a sitting position next to the one she dug herself, Kat placed her elbows on her bent knees, pressing her balled up fists against her lips. It was surreal, horrifying. But it was something that had been branded deep inside her ever since she could remember; the weak die out and the strong will survive. 

Kat grabbed the pack of smokes, crumpling the package as soon as she noticed its emptiness. She threw it aside, before a tap on her shoulders drew her attention. Looking up, she saw a cigarette jabbed in her face by T-Dog. She grabbed it and lighted it up, nodding at the next pat on her shoulder. The current situation was taking its toll on each one of them, keeping silent while they dug the graves and after.

Finishing the cigarette, Kat flicked the remains to the ground between her bent legs, stomping on it with the heel of her boots. She pushed herself back to her feet, watching the people that marched slowly towards the empty graves. 

‘Carol?’

Daryl shook her head, his darkened eyes glued to the two men that lowered Sophia’s covered lifeless body into the small grave in front of them.

Kat closed the distance between them, not caring about anyone else gathered around, not seeing anyone except for Daryl. She stopped next to him, facing the graves as she gently pushed her arm circling his. Sliding her fingers down his dirt covered forearm before lacing them tightly, Kat intertwined their fingers in a silent desperate need of comfort. 

Daryl squeezed the small warm hand as soon as their fingers laced together, pulling her frail looking figure closer to him until he felt her droopy shoulder bump against his arm softly. 

Kat let her head fall on his shoulder, watching silently as the first shovel of dirt fell on Sophia’s body, failing to notice the indignation creeping up on Daryl’s face.

*

‘What do you mean gone? Gone where?’

Kat yelled as she went down the ladder on the RV, not trusting her own feet to jump straight to the ground. She watched Glenn running towards the truck, Rick following him shortly after.

‘Something’s wrong with Hershel’s daughter and he is nowhere around the farm. We need to get him back.’ Rick answered her, running backwards to the pulled up truck in the driveway.

‘Keep an eye on things around here while we’re out, okay?’

Kat nodded, raising two fingers to her shaded forehead in a small gesture directed at Rick, before the man got in the truck and drove away. She paced around for a while, eyes darting around the camp searching for any signs of Daryl or Carol, but none of them were there. As soon as she saw T-Dog, she threw her rifle at him, running to the porch.

‘Maggie?’

Kat yanked the door open, shouting after Maggie as soon as she reached the house, but the girl was nowhere to be found.

‘In here.’ 

Maggie’s frame popped at the top of the stairs, gesturing Kat to follow her. She climbed the stairs two at a time, letting Maggie lead her to the guest room. The blonde was laying on the bed, eyes empty, staring in front of her into nothingness. 

‘What happened?’ Kat draped her arm across Maggie’s shoulders in a comforting side hug, while watching Beth’s unmoving figure.

‘She was washing the dishes and then –’ Maggie paused, silencing her sobs. ‘She collapsed on the floor.’

Kat rubbed her shoulder in a comforting way, recognizing the state of shock Beth was in. She let go of Maggie and pushed by Patricia, heading towards the head of the bed. Kat took a pillow from under Beth’s head, shaking hers at the stack the women made her rest on. Pushing the girl’s feet up with one hand, Kat placed the pillow under, gently lowering them back down. 

‘Cover her with a blanket, or better two until Hershel comes back.’ Kat instructed the women in the room, while placing her forearm against Beth’s forehead. Grabbing her wrist, Kat kept silent for a minute, counting Beth’s weakened but steady heartbeats.

Letting go of Beth’s hand slowly, Kat turned to face Maggie. She wrapped her arms around her shoulders again, gently patting her back. Letting go after a few long seconds, Kat left the room only to catch a glimpse of Lori rushing out of the house.

Kat followed her outside, watching Lori head for the barn. She walked in the same direction, curiosity getting the best of her this time, until she heard Daryl’s voice. 

‘You want him? Go fetch him yourself. I got better things to do. ‘

‘What's the matter with you? ‘

‘Don't you be so selfish. ‘

‘Selfish? Listen to me, Olive Oyl. I was out there looking for that little girl every single day. I took a bullet and an arrow in the process. Don't you tell me about me getting my hands dirty! You want those two idiots? Have a nice ride. I'm done looking for people.’

‘I’ll go.’

Kat looked down at Daryl’s crouched frame, feeling Lori pat her on the shoulder as a thank you before heading back to the house. Kat placed her hands on her hips, watching the man carving a new arrow with more rage than needed.

‘What was that about?’

‘Weren’t ya going around fetchin’ her husband?’

‘Hey, look at me.’ Her voice turned to a soothing whisper, while she bent down in front of him, reaching her hand towards his face to make him look her in the eye. She flinched at the way he pushed it aside, not letting her touch him.

Daryl raised his head, furrowing his eyebrows at the small body balled up in front of him. Kat reached out her hand again, placing in on his arm this time, absentmindedly caressing the soft skin on the inside of his forearm. She saw him calming down under her touch, but his eyes roamed around her face, darkening with each passing second.

‘Ya’re all friendly with the cop now, I see.’ Daryl nodded at Shane’s cap on her head. He spit the words on a harsh tone, biting down on the inside of his lower lip. 

Kat frowned at him, green eyes widening as soon as something in her brain clicked. Daryl was jealous. She jerked her head back with an incredulous look plastered across her face. She grabbed the hat taking it off in a quick motion and pulled her braid out through the small hole before patting it into place on her right shoulder. 

‘Да, we’re both trying not to jump at each other’s throat. If that’s how you understand being friendly.’ Kat’s voice took an ironic tone, but her eyes were warm and the smile forming on her lips made Daryl raise a questioning eyebrow at her.

Kat dropped her eyes, following the random patterns that her fingertips were tracing on Daryl’s forearm. 

‘When things will go to hell, I want you on my side. If I’d ever go missing –’ She trailed off, raising her head to get on the same eye level with him again. ‘– you’d be the first person I would want out there looking for me. And I will go to hell and back for you. Get that through that head of yours.’ Kat leaned on the tip of her boots, closing the space between them, their faces only inches apart.

‘Because, Daryl Dixon’ Kat pushed her index finger softly against his chest, emphasizing her point as soon as the words rolled off her tongue. ‘We’re partners now. Right?’ 

It came out as a silent whisper, brushing against his lips. Kat leaned forward, gently pressing her forehead against his, watching Daryl’s eyes flutter shut. She brushed the tip of her nose softly against his, making him open them again, hooded blue eyes trying to take in as much as they could, the small sunburnt nose brushing against his sending shivers down his spine, the freckles peppered across her cheeks, the black stitches on her right cheekbone, the full, slightly parted lips only a breath away from his.

‘Right?’ Kat asked again in a soft voice, golden eyes glazed over, and he could feel her holding herself back, almost backing away from him. 

Daryl’s fingers locked around her arm. He was not pushing her away but not pulling her against him either. Kat straightened her back, pulling away from him on her own, and exhaled deeply, trying to wash away the feeling that crept up inside her, almost pushing her to cross boundaries. 

‘I should go.’

She felt his grip loosening as she pulled her arm from his, getting back on her feet. Kat’s eyes lingered on his figure for a few seconds, before walking away silently, holding onto Shane’s hat.

Kat threw the cap on the table set near the tents, grabbing her rifle in the process and secured the strap on her shoulder. She ignored the looks directed her way and straddled her bike, furrowing at the thin layer of dust already set on it.

She felt upset at herself, disappointed at the way she pushed Daryl into having any reaction towards her, outraged at how things unfolded with Sophia. Kat heard the engine purr loudly as she leaned against the bike, her rage getting the best of her, speeding down the road. 

She had said partner left and right, but she was confused about what it really meant for him. One thing she knew for sure, she would indeed go to hell and back for that man. She couldn’t put her finger on what triggered it exactly, but she believed it with her entire being, she felt it in her bones.

As soon as she entered the town, she prayed silently to run into some stray walkers, so she’d be able to pop that lid open and let it all out. Kat noticed the truck Rick and Glenn took when they left earlier that day, parked a few feet away from her. She stopped the engine, parking in one of the dark alleys, and swung her leg over the bike, trying to make as less noise as possible.

Two gunshots inside. People circling the building. Kat glued her back to the wall behind her, trying to stay hidden as much as she could, while making her way to the bar. She watched three men go around the building, searching for the back door while another was knocking on the front door. Rick and the others must have been still inside, probably making their way to the back door. 

Kat jumped from the shadows behind the truck, trying to get close to the unknown man before he noticed her, but the clip of her rifle hit the door with a loud metallic noise. Scowling at her own stupidity, she listened closely at the man’s footsteps, making it obvious he was circling around the car, being only a few feet away from her. 

She exhaled deeply, watching his shadow spread on the ground towards her. Kat reached for her hunting knives, grabbing one knife in each hand while slowly pushing her left leg flat on the ground towards the growing shadow. She pushed the sole of her boot straight into the man’s shin, successfully tripping him over in her direction and in the split of a second, both her arms snapped in his way. Fresh blood gushed over, splashing on face and chest as she watched the unknown man struggling to breathe but the life in his eyes dimmed an instant, blades deep into the dead man’s throat on each side.

Kat pushed the sole of her boot against his chest, steadying the lifeless body so it won’t fall completely on her, while taking out the knives, grinding onto each other with a metallic sound. Kat pushed the body to the side, dropping next to her as she tried to wipe away the blood in her eyes. 

A gunshot echoed from behind the building, followed by others shortly after as Kat got back to her feet and jumped over the brick wall of the alley, face to face with Glenn all balled up behind of a dumpster. She raised a finger to her lips, signaling him to stay quiet, not even noticing the horrified look on his face, as he watched the blood dripping from her face and hands.

Kat tilted her head at the faint shadow coming their way and kept her finger pressed to her lips. A twisted smile twitched on her bloody face, watching the shadow closing in as she leaped sideways in front of the armed man.

Glenn was frozen, waiting for the gunshot that never followed, but the only thing he could hear was a horrifying choking sound and a loud thump and after that silence. He turned his head around only to see Kat taking a step back, looking at something on the ground in front of her, her knife pointed upwards with fresh blood dripping down her forearm.

‘Kat?’

Rick’s voice snapped her back to reality, sighing deeply as she lowered the knife. She put it back in its strap, not caring about all the blood spilling over and dampening her pants. She offered a hand to Glenn and watched him hesitate for a couple of seconds before grabbing it, a wet slap echoing through the air, making his face contort in disgust. 

‘You’re all okay?’ 

Rick nodded, watching the blood dripping from all over her body, trying to figure out if she was bitten or not. Kat shook her head and pushed past him only to meet Hershel’s eyes, mirroring Glenn’s way of looking at her right after she jumped in front of him. 

‘I’m not bit, if that’s what you’re looking for. But that might change soon.’ 

Kat’s words were partly covered by low growls heading their way. 

‘Go. Front door is safe too.’ 

Grabbing the rifle, she started shooting at the walkers coming their way, creating an opening for the three men behind her, helping them get away safely before she started running after them. They barely made it over the brick wall and Kat tried to rush them to the truck, when the piercing screams for help drew their attention.

The four ran towards the street and Kat had her rifle back in place, ready to pull the trigger at the crying boy.

‘Kat, no! Snap out of it! _Now_!’ Rick pushed her rifle down, towering over her in the process.

‘Please help me!’ 

‘His people tried to kill you and this place is crawling with walkers!’ Kat’s upper lip curled in annoyance as she spat the words in Rick’s face.

‘We can't leave him!’

Kat jerked away from Rick, leaving the three men to handle the boy however they wanted and started shooting at the walkers limping in their direction.

‘Whatever you decide there, do it stupidly fast!’ Kat yelled at them, her voice getting hoarse. ‘I’m running low on ammo. Rick!’

She took shot after shot, but the walkers kept coming their way, easily limping or crawling around the pilled-up bodies on the ground. As the roamers were getting closer and closer Kat realized she was in over her head. A pain filled scream pierced the air around them, making Kat look back at the group only to see them carrying the boy to the truck.

Kat’s head snapped back in front of her just before a walker was about to grab her arms, hitting the side of its head with her rifle, before sprinting away down the street. Two walkers were standing between her and her bike and she took out her hunting knives, pushing both blades through the first one’s eye sockets, when the face of the other one was pulverized in front of her, spraying blood all over her side.

Straddling her bike, she caught a glimpse of a shotgun in Rick’s hand being pulled back into the car as they drove by her, the herd of walkers following suite. Kat felt the engine coming to life under her and turned left in a tight U, speeding away behind the truck. 

Kat pulled in front of the camp right after the them, parking her bike in the same spot she took it from earlier that day. She laughed drily, it sure didn’t feel like it was the same day. All the strength in her body was left behind, in front of the bar. 

‘Patricia, prepare the shed for surgery.’

She got off the bike, searching for the pack of cigarettes with trembling hands, watching the fuss created in front of her. A baby. Surgery for the kid Rick and Hershel saved. 

‘Oh my god. Are you hurt?’

Kat didn’t register the question being directed at her and kept staring in front of her, spacing out, wondering why she smiled before she murdered the guy that wanted to kill Glenn. He must have seen that, she was sure. 

A hand going from side to side in front of her brought her back, flinching and dropping the blood stained cigarette to the ground.

‘Are you hurt? I am so sorry, I should have never let you go, it was supposed to be me!’ Lori’s eyes were filled with tears, roaming all over Kat’s body, searching for open wounds.

‘I hope you’re joking.’ Kat’s voice was hoarse from all the yelling, an uncomfortable feeling setting in her throat. She bent down to pick up the half spent cigarette, before placing a bloody hand on Rick’s shoulder, smearing it without intention.

‘Congrats for the baby.’ 

Kat pushed past him, swaying on her feet, heading to nowhere in the process. She blinked, surprised at the dampness on her cheeks, wondering if she was crying or if there was still blood on her face. Then her eyes fell on Daryl’s face, of all the people gathered around the camp. The horror in his eyes made her legs move faster in his direction. She started sobbing silently, feeling his arms wrap around her shoulders as soon as she reached him. She knew that look. She had it deeply engraved in the back of her mind. It was the look of a man that was about to lose everything.

‘I’m okay. I’m okay.’

She buried her head between the nape of his neck and his shoulder, arms wrapped tightly around his back, whispering that she was okay over and over again.

‘Ya look like shit.’ 

Daryl’s words made her chuckle, but he didn’t let go of her small frame, gently brushing his fingers through her blood stained strands of hair, trying to convince himself that she was there, in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually had so much fun writing the action part in this one, got myself inspired by 'Hidden Citizens - Paint it black' for some reason.  
> Let me know what you guys thought of it (◕‿◕✿)


	11. Monster

Daryl hadn’t left her side that night, silently following wherever the people around pushed Kat, his eyes not even once blinking away from her body, searching for any wound even though she kept saying that she was okay, like a mantra that was starting to freak him out. There was so much blood. 

They stumbled through the front door, both Daryl and Maggie steadying her body from each side, guiding Kat up the stairs towards the bathroom. 

‘I killed two people.’

Her voice came out raspy and breathy, making Daryl and Maggie stop on the hallway in front of the bathroom door. They shared a short disturbed look, before Maggie pushed the door open and lead Kat inside, making her lean against the bathtub.

Kat turned her head to her left, blinking lazily at Daryl’s figure, propped against the door frame. She felt a wet cloth against her cheek, wiping away the blood that started to dry up into a grimy crust. Her arms felt numb, her whole body felt weak, exhaustion settling in washing away any drop of adrenaline that was pumped through her vein earlier.

‘Part of me enjoyed it?’

She raised her eyebrows in confusion, feeling tears staring to swell up as she pushed aside Maggie’s gentle hand. Kat rose to her feet and took a few steps towards the mirror, drawing a shaky breath out of herself at the image in front of her.

Her eyes were puffy and red, roaming over the dry blood stains clinging to her forehead and cheeks, watching the dried up trails down her neck and collarbones. Her grey hair framed her face in a gruesome way, dark red soaked strands sticking to her forehead and temples. Shaky fingers pushed at the forming crust, trying to wipe it away, digging the heel of her palm into her cheeks in a desperate attempt to make it go away, fingernails clawing into the soft skin, as the tears started to fall, blurring her vision.

Steady arms wrapped around her from behind, grabbing her hands gently and pulling them away from her face, a soothing shush whispered into the top of her hair as she started sobbing again, hoarse and dread filled moans echoing between the four walls. 

‘You did it to save our people. To save Glenn. Rick. My dad.’ Maggie’s soft voice comforted her, as the woman resumed her gentle touch, pushing the damp cloth across Kat’s cheeks and down her neck. ‘Nothing else matters.’

Kat nodded absently, letting her head fall back on Daryl’s shoulder, looking at the mirror in front of them, feeling him press his cheek into her hair. She found his eyes in their reflection and there was no fear in them. No judgement. Nothing but a warm look, accompanied by the constant whispered shushing into her hair. She felt his fingers crawl between hers, calloused palms covering the back of hers entirely. 

‘We should take these off. Shower. I’ll give you some clean clothes, okay?’ 

Maggie caressed Kat’s clean but damp cheek, watching her nod slowly with her eyes still glued at the reflection in the mirror. The girl left quickly after, to grab a fresh set of clothes and give the two some privacy, closing the door behind her.

Kat’s sobs stopped some time ago, she couldn’t remember when, maybe she couldn’t anymore. Her breathing steadied, leaning against Daryl’s chest as he slightly swayed both of them in a calming way.

‘Why?’

Daryl’s hands tightened around hers, not breaking the slight movement he absently repeated over and over again. 

‘Why aren’t you looking at me like I’m a monster?’ Kat’s voice turned to a whisper, feeling her throat tighten again. 

‘Because ya ain’t one.’ Daryl let go of her left hand, gently brushing the stained hair out of her face, pushing it behind her ear. ‘Ya’re a fighter. One that caught her enemy against the ropes and enjoyed feelin' alive, before the roles could’ve been switched.’

Kat sighed as the tranquil feeling that was setting inside her chest again. She felt his arm circling around her bare waist, pulling her against him tightly. He was trying to make her understand her own nature.

‘When ya showed up all bloody and swayed on your feet towards me earlier –‘ 

‘I’m sorry.’ Kat stopped him midway, placing her hand on the arm wrapped around her waist, absently caressing it. Daryl squeezed his hand tighter around hers as he pulled her body against him as close as possible.

‘Don’t go and pull that shit again.’

Kat gave a weak smile to their reflection, as her fingertips brushed lightly across his arm. 

‘We’re partners now, right? Partners don’t do that shit to each other.’

The small smile on her lips spread to her cheeks, green eyes widening at their reflection. Kat nodded, feeling his steady breath warming up the top of her head as his arm squeezed tighter around her waist.

The knock on the door made them both look away from the mirror, watching Maggie place a set of clean folded clothes on the small cabinet next to the sink. The girl jerked her head towards the door, silently signaling to Daryl to leave. He let go of Kat’s waist, whispering that he’ll be right outside, waiting for her.

As soon as the door closed behind them and they heard the shower running, Daryl propped himself against the door, arms crossed on his chest.

‘Leave the shirt here if you want. I’ll wash it for you.’

Daryl looked down at the blood stains smeared across his chest from where he hugged Kat earlier. He nodded at Maggie, still not budging away from the bathroom door.

‘Nothing about her breakdown to the others.’ 

As soon as the words rolled off his tongue, Shane’s figure towered over Maggie’s in the hallway. Daryl locked eyes with him, a deafening silence filling the air around them. He watched the man’s eyes dart across the small hallway, stopping on his frame again, eyeing the bathroom door.

‘Easy, man. I just wanted to know if she’s alright.’

‘She is.’

‘Good.’ Shane nodded, biting his upper lip in visible distress, his eyes still glued on Daryl’s frame, guarding the bathroom door.

Maggie threw a knowing look at Daryl before leading Shane down the stairs, taking him away from the hallway in the blink of an eye.

After a couple of minutes, Daryl heard the shower being turned off followed shortly by the distinct metallic sound of the door being unlocked. He backed away, facing the door as it opened, watching Kat’s frail looking form pushing past it. 

Her hair was still dripping wet, braided loosely down her back, dampening the soft fabric of the black shirt draped across her small shoulders, way too big for her, arms clutching the belts and straps against her chest. Her legs were bare, the short jeans Maggie lent her showing off the freshly bruised skin on her thighs and the raised skin of a healed scar on her left calf, fading away into the same bloody combat boots she had worn before. 

Daryl cocked his head down the hallway, watching her walk down the stairs in front of him and out the door, on the porch. Everyone else seemed to have scattered away to their tents or inside the house, leaving the camp dead silent. He fished the almost empty cigarette pack out of his back pocket, holding one out for Kat, before placing one between his lips.

She lazily reached out for it, placing it between her lips and took a couple of steps towards Daryl. Kat tilted her head, fingers pressed to her lips around the cigarette as she leaned closer to him, letting him light it up for her. Taking another step towards him, Kat let her arms fall next to her body while pressing her forehead on Daryl’s chest.

‘I don’t want to be alone.’ Her voice was weak, as she frowned absently at the blood stains on his shirt.

‘Ya aren’t.’ Daryl took another drag, before patting the top of her head with the same hand he was holding onto the cigarette, gently flattening the rebel wet hairs back into the loose braid. 

‘Not that. I don’t want to be alone tonight.’

Kat bit the inside of her cheek as soon as the words went past her lips, waiting for his answer, eyes still glued to his chest, a bit anxious to meet his gaze.

‘Ya won’t. Ya’re all acting like it’s the first time we’d be sleepin’ together. What the hell, Kat?’ 

His tone was flat if anything, but she didn’t fail to hear the playful edge in his words, drawing a small chuckle out of her. She took a step back, raising her head to look him in the eye, with a smug smirk plastered on hers.

‘Daryl Dixon, you’re saying that you wanna _sleep_ with me tonight?’ 

She expected to see him frown in annoyance or to be met by a deadpanned look like he always threw her way after hearing her deviant nonsense, but her cheeky smirk disappeared from her face, being replaced by a slightly pursed-lips smile as soon as she met warm eyes, staring fondly back at her. 

‘Ye’re finally talking like Kat again.’

Daryl brushed his fingertips through her damp hair, a side smirk tugging at the corner of his lips as he puffed away at the forgotten cigarette between them, watching as her expression changed under his gaze.

Kat flicked the cigarette over the rail, slightly shaking her head, but her smile didn’t drop for even a second. Turning around on her heels, she went down the stairs, looking over her shoulder only to see him following her closely. 

‘I like it.’ Kat’s voice was loud enough to reach him without looking back again. ‘The way you say my name.’ 

‘How else would I be sayin’ it?’ Daryl followed her back to their tents, the feeling creeping inside his chest fading away as soon as he saw her frame pass by her own tent, heading towards his.

‘I haven’t been called by my real name in years. I actually can’t remember the last person who used it.’ 

Kat stopped in front of Daryl’s tent, turning around to face him, her hands tugging absently at the belts and straps held against her chest. She tried to shrug it off, not really sure why she had mentioned that, because it was unrelated. She was actually fond of the way _Daryl_ called out her name. 

Daryl stopped in front of her, unzipping the tent as he held out his arm towards the belts she was holding onto. She let them slide on his arm and watched him tuck them away in the corner of the tent, before rising back to his feet and jerked his head towards the entrance. 

Kat bent down in a sitting position at the entrance, unfastening the straps of her boots and untying the shoelaces before placing them away outside, pushing herself inside on the makeshift bed.

She felt his gaze drop on the scar spreading from her knee on the entire side of her left calf, as he zipped up the tent behind him and he let himself drop next to her into a sitting position, with their shoulders slightly touching.

His glaring eyes moved higher, frowning at the fresh bruises on the sides of Kat’s thighs, as something inside him threatened to throw him back where he was a few hours ago, recalling the rage and guilt that washed over him as he watched a bloodied Kat stumble in his way, the way she clawed at her own face in disgust, her piercing sobs fading away as he held her arms away. Daryl leaned against her small frame, gently pressing his forehead against hers.

Kat leaned her head back, watching him through hooded eyes, feeling every cell in her body coming back to life under his gaze. She felt his ragged breath brushing against her parted lips, his earthy scent hypnotic beyond reason, making her a tad lightheaded, feeling her own heart thumping inside her chest so loudly that she was afraid he would hear it. She felt his hand brushing softly against her cheek, his fingertips tracing tenderly the shape of her jaw, closing her eyes shut under his touch, before his thumb brushed her lower lip and she could hear his breath hitch. 

And everything stopped when his lips met hers, but the thumping inside her chest only intensified, feeling his lips moving against hers and Kat could only focus on how addictively he invaded all her sense. Her hand brushed against his shirt before digging her nails in its fabric, pulling him closer, feeling the tears that threatened to damp her cheeks at the raw moment unfolding between them.

They pulled apart slowly, trying to even their breaths as their foreheads were once again flushed against one another. Daryl brushed his thumb across the stitches on her cheek, slowly taking in the way her green eyes were glazed over, the freckles peppered across her flushed cheeks and on her small nose that she pushed against his, the alluring way she bit down on her lower lip under his gaze, burning it all in his memory and wondering why hadn’t he kissed her earlier that day, because it felt _so right_.

Kat felt his hand gently sliding down the side of her neck, his fingertips tenderly caressing the back of her head while his thumb brushed against the soft skin behind her ear. She felt him pull away, but he pressed his lips on her forehead, quickly replacing the lost intimate gesture she grew so fond of.

‘We should get some sleep.’ Kat’s voice turned to a raspy whisper, not trusting herself to speak loudly.

She felt him nod, with his lips still pressed to her forehead. Kat pulled away slowly, a content smile plastered on her flushed face and laid next to him on her side with her back against him. She felt him shift behind her as he pulled a blanket over them, followed soon by a strong arm snaking lazily around her waist, pulling her against his body.

‘Oi, munchkin. Thanks for pulling me out of that headspace.’ 

She heard him scoff softly, and she could feel the smirk tugging at his lips before she felt his arm tightening around her again, as he kissed the top of her head slowly before drifting off to sleep.


	12. Can't take it back, part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warning** : this chapter contains explicit description of physical torture. If some of you can't go through it, skip the marked section and read the note at the end for a quick recap (hoping that I nailed it and it didn't turn out funny)
> 
> God, writing this chapter was such an emotional rollercoaster. 
> 
> Also I should credit the hard work of the amazing guys from _transcripts.foreverdreaming.org_ , as their transcripts make my attempt to smooth Kat into the story in a more natural way and I honestly couldn't remember Randall's exact confession.

Kat was rummaging absently through one of her supply bags, counting the spare magazines she had left. The past few days had been slow and peaceful if anything, keeping watch when it was her turn, guarding Randall, the boy she was ready to kill back at the bar, while he was recovering from the surgery Hershel performed on him, at night going back silently to Daryl’s tent and curling up into a ball against his sleeping form, always waking up to a strong arm draped lazily around her waist, feeling his steady breath on the soft skin on the back of her neck. 

Sometimes he would be the first one to wake up, always before sunrise, and the first time it happened, Kat could have sworn she dreamt it, but it happened again a couple of days later. He would wake up and gently trace the soft curved line forming between her shoulder and neck with his fingertips, or softly brush away the strands of hair from her face, while rubbing his thumb lightly across her cheeks, other times just absently caressing the top of her head, all before clearing his throat and wrapping her sleeping form with the blanket up to her neck. 

She nodded to herself and bit her lip in a failed attempt to keep in check the silly smile she was sporting on, directed mostly at Daryl’s useless and failed efforts to hide away the need of physical contact between them, but partly satisfied with the consistent numbers of bullets ready to be locked and loaded, replacing the empty magazine with a new one. The short metallic click made her come down from her self-induced high, patting herself on the knee before rising from her crouched position. 

Walking back to the camp, Kat threw the strap around her neck, letting the rifle fall on her back sideways while she adjusted the thin black strip on the fabric of her shirt, between her breasts and had enough time to smoke half a cigarette, considering the recent distance Daryl put between his tent and the rest of the group. 

Getting closer to the house, Kat frowned at Rick and Shane’s figures, watching as one of them pushed Randall to one of the cars, while the other checked a couple of guns. The boy had a cloth draped over his face and she could see the knots fastened around his wrists as he was led towards the trunk of the car.

‘What’s with that?’

Kat threw a questioning look towards the RV, where Dale was watching the same scene as her, but with a disappointed look plastered on his face. The tension between her and Dale dissipated over the past few days, but Kat was still feeling the guilt panging inside her stomach once in a while.

‘They’re driving Randall away, to leave him out in the open. _To give him a fair shot_ , as Rick mentioned.’ Dale scoffed as soon as he spat the words, watching Shane push the boy inside the trunk.

‘It would have been the same thing if you had shot him that night.’ 

Kat looked up at Dale, noticing the way he snapped his head at her as soon as the words left his mouth. He threw an apologetic look at her, but said nothing else. After they came back, Rick had explained to the group what happened back at the bar, not leaving out the fact that she was seconds away from killing the boy in cold blood when they ran past him in the alley.

‘Dale, you can judge me all you want. But that would have been the smartest decision for all of us.’

‘As I said before, Kat, I know you are a _good person_. What you just said? That’s not who you are.’ The man shook his head, watching Kat walk away towards the house, waving her hand in his direction.

Kat pressed her lips into a thin straight line, while dropping her arm next to her body, slowly going up the steps connected to the porch. It was beyond her understanding how Dale was able to say that, especially after hearing what happened back in town and he and everyone else saw her that night back at the camp, casually smoking a cigarette, all bathed in fresh blood like she went through a satanic baptism ceremony.

Trying to brush away the dark thoughts creeping up inside her mind, Kat looked around, wondering where most of the women were gone to, when she heard a scream inside the house. She flung the door wide open, heading straight for the guest room, only to be pushed aside by Andrea, stomping away down the hallway and out the front door.

‘Hey, hey, easy, милая.’ She had bumped into Maggie’s frame just as the girl was about to turn left on the hallway, wrapping her arms around her shoulders, watching the visible shock on Maggie’s face. ‘What happened?’

‘Beth. Beth just tried to kill herself. Andrea was supposed to watch her, but –’

Kat hugged Maggie, silently shushing her sobs, thinking about the dark place her little sister was drowning in after she woke up from her shock induced coma, a couple of days ago. Kat pulled away from Maggie, her arms still around the girl’s shoulders, gently rubbing her back in a comforting way.

‘Can I talk to her for a sec?’

Maggie nodded, wiping the tears away from her swollen eyes. ‘Daddy is patching her up. When he’s done, you can go.’

Kat propped herself against the wall facing the door, watching Maggie go down the hallway. After a couple of minutes, the door opened slowly, both Hershel and Patricia carrying some kind of first aid kit out of the room.

‘Is she conscious?’ 

Hershel threw a short nod in Kat’s way. The current situation, everything that happened since they got here, was slowly taking its toll on the poor man. His cheeks were hollower than when Kat first met him, and the dark circles under his eyes were growing with each passing day.

Kat waited for them to walk away, before she knocked against the wooden door. Not waiting for an answer that she knew would never come, she pushed the door open and took the rifle off her back, placing it on the closest chair. She let herself fall flat on the bed next to Beth’s curled up frame, looking up at the ceiling while absently swaying her feet from side to side, making the girl shift uncomfortably at the movement carried through the mattress to her side. 

‘Eighteen years ago I lost someone very close to me. Killed right in front of my eyes.’ Kat’s voice was soft, as she blinked away a tear that was dried up long ago, a mournful and bitter smile growing on her lips. ‘After that particular.. mission, I was done. I wanted to stop the nightmares that I constantly saw with my eyes, both wide open and wide shut; I _needed_ to lose the battle that carried inside me for a long time after. I was praying for something to give me the strength to just _let go_.’ 

‘Your point?’ Beth’s small voice was muffled by the covers pulled up to her face.

‘My point? I know what it’s like being there. In that dark place. The helplessness? The constant pull that tugs at every fiber of your being to just let go? I’m more than familiar with it.’ Kat watched as Beth shifted her body under the covers to turn on her right side, coming face to face with her. 

She raised her arms in front of her, absently tracing her fingertips across one of her wrists, remembering how Daryl’s fingers outlined the faded scar over and over again when they held hands, but asked nothing about it. Kat smiled fondly, letting the ever-growing realization of the tenderness the man was treating her with set in, before she turned her head to face Beth. Kat held up her forearm so the girl could see it, as she outlined the scar on her wrist with her finger. 

‘What stopped you?’ Beth’s whisper made Kat shift her eyes back to her. 

‘What stopped _you_?’ Kat mirrored the small smile spreading across Beth’s face as they locked eyes, a deep sigh leaving her chest. ‘You are not alone, _солнце_.’

‘Solntse?’ 

Kat threw her feet off the bed while chuckling at the confused yet amused look on Beth’s face as she tried to spell out the word.

‘It means _sunshine_ , but the direct translation would be just _sun_. It seemed just right for someone whose strength makes them shine so bright, now, isn’t it?’

Kat secured the loose strap around her upper body once again, closing the door behind her, after winking at Beth’s covered frame as the girl shyly smiled back. 

Just as she stepped out in the hallway, a pair of gentle green eyes met Kat’s, before Maggie wrapped her arms around Kat’s shoulders in a tight hug. The girl swayed them both from side to side, a shaky breath leaving her lungs before letting go slowly.

‘You little eavesdropper.’ Kat puckered up her lips, trying to tease Maggie into cracking a small chuckle, which happened as soon as the girl pulled away.

‘I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry.’

‘She’ll be fine. She’s strong.’ Kat softly pinched Maggie’s cheek, making the small smile on the girl’s face grow wider.

‘Now come on. I’m in dire need of a cigarette and a walk and I do need company, if that’s okay.’ Kat raised a questioning eyebrow at Maggie, before she was met with a slight nod, pushing the girl down the hallway and out the door as soon as Maggie dropped her head in agreement, drawing another chuckle out of her, this time the smile spreading to her cheeks, making Kat grin in satisfaction.

*

By the time Maggie and Kat finished their walk around the farm, it was already past noon. They shared a curious look after seeing everyone gathered up in front of the house and they both started running, as an unsettling feeling set in their chests.

‘There they are.’ Shane’s voice carried and Kat did not fail to notice the fresh bruises on his face, as she and Maggie stopped near the group, trying to catch their breath.

Kat’s eyes drifted off to Rick as she tried to steady the way her lungs cried for more air. He looked clean but bruised as well, less than Shane though. 

‘What happened?’ 

‘Randall happened. He knows Maggie. He knows where we are, so everything we did, covering his eyes and all, it won’t work.’ Rick rubbed his chin, visibly stressed out.

‘Need to _make_ him talk. ‘Bout his people. If ya’ll let him out there, we need to know the danger it’ll put us in.’

Daryl’s voice made Kat snap her head in his direction. That morning was one of the times he woke up before her, disappearing deep into the woods all day, all alone. Kat understood his actions from the first day he left before sunrise, and didn’t want to push him into opening up more than she already had. That was his way of coming to terms with all that happened ever since they all ended up at the farm. But at sundown he’d be back, and they’d share a cigarette in front of the tent, eat whatever he brought back from his hunt, all before drifting off to sleep in each other’s arms.

‘We can’t let him out there, man. That’s clear as day.’ Shane snapped again at the idea Rick enforced in the Randall situation.

‘And how can we make him talk? The boy didn’t share anything while he was in his recovery time-out.’ Dale pointed it out, regretting it as soon as he voiced it out. ‘No. Absolutely not.’ His words came out as an answer to Daryl’s grim expression. Dale shook his head in defeat, searching for a single look that would be on the same wavelength with his around the group.

‘Torture, people? Torture? This group is losing its humanity!’

Kat watched him throw his arms in the air, visibly shaken at the fact that no one else, aside him, was against the possibility of torturing the boy. 

‘And who would do it?’ His voice was incredulous, a deep bitter scowl darkening his face.

‘I can.’ Kat crossed her arms on her chest, as her teeth sunk in the already bruised flesh on the inside of her cheek, watching the various looks thrown her way.

‘Of course you can.’ Shane scoffed as he let out a dark chuckle, rubbing his palms against his now bald head. ‘You’re actually trained in this kind of stuff, right? The perks of having a Russian spy part of our group, man.’ Shane threw a fake smile at Rick, bumping his elbow against the man’s arm, as if he just made the greatest joke ever.

‘Shane, stop.’

‘Hey, do you need a bucket and a rat? I’m sure the farm girl and your boyfriend can get it for you, right?’ Shane continued his mild assault towards Kat, ignoring Rick’s warning and successfully drawing a small scowl out of her as soon as he had mentioned both Maggie and Daryl.

Kat dug her nails into the soft skin of her arms, trying to keep quiet, but she felt the rage starting boiling deep inside her and spreading through her veins like wildfire.

‘Mind your own fuckin’ business, man.’ 

Daryl’s growl made her snap out of it, moving her eyes on his visibly tensed figure, seeing his knuckles turn white on the strap on his shoulder while pulling the crossbow against his back.

Shane chuckled and threw his arms in the air, shaking his head in the process. 

‘Come on.’ Daryl cocked his head to the side, calling out to Kat. 

Kat pushed herself past Shane, not even looking at the man in the process, but her jaw was tensed to the point her teeth hurt. She followed Daryl silently towards the small wooden cabin on the farm’s property, both of them stopping in front of the door.

‘Ya sure?’

‘Yeah. Are _you_ sure you want to come? Once you see it.. I can’t take it back.’ Kat bit down on her lower lip, concerned green eyes roaming over his face. Kat watched him give a short nod while biting the inside of his lower lip, before he opened the door.

‘I’ll back ya up.’ 

**_Trigger warning starts here_ **

She walked in first, taking in her surroundings and trying not to reconsider letting Daryl to tag along. Her eyes stopped on the crouched frame of Randall, noticing the chains they used to tie up his hands on either side, as the door closed behind Daryl. She took off the strap around her chest and placed it carefully behind a wooden barrel, away from Randall’s soon-to-be field of vision. 

Daryl watched her take a deep breath, closing her eyes in the process, trying to get into the right mindset, he guessed. When she opened them, he felt the hair on the back of his head stand up. The indifference that was oozing out of her usually warm eyes was awfully unnerving. He saw her nodding without looking at him, signaling that it’s okay to take off the blindfold and watched her walk towards the boy.

Kat watched the boy blink at the sudden light around him, as he started to adjust and take in his surroundings. His eyes went back and forth between her and Daryl, before settling on her figure.

‘I remember you. You killed the people I was with, back then. At the bar?’

Daryl’s eyes widened in slight shock, watching as the heel of her combat boots dug deep in Randall’s cheek in the split of a second, before his head snapped to the side and blood splattered across the wooden wall behind him, the faint sound of something small rolling on the floor echoing through the cabin.

The boy watched two of his teeth rolling away on the wooden floor after bouncing back from the wall, tears threatening to spill on his cheeks at the sharp pain spreading through his entire jaw.

‘He asks the questions. You answer. No chitchat.’

Randall’s horror filled eyes landed on Daryl, as his breath was getting shorter and ragged to the point Daryl thought the boy would start hyperventilating, obviously feeling the danger he was in. He nodded desperately, moving his eyes back on the figure towering over him.

‘How many?’

‘I barely knew those guys. I met 'em on the road.’

Daryl scowled at the boy and watched as the sole of Kat’s boot smashed Randall’s head against the wall behind him with a loud cracking noise, keeping her foot pressed into the side of his face, slowly rubbing the heel into his jaw, keeping him from moving in a painful vice.

‘I thought I said no chitchat. For every answer that’s not relevant, I’ll take two more of your teeth.’ Kat leaned closer, the grey strands of hair falling around her cheeks and brushing against her bent knee. ‘And when I’m done with those, I’ll start breaking fingers. Slowly. Painfully. Letting you hear every snap and crack your phalanges can make. Like this.’

Daryl saw her fingers slide down the chains that kept Randall immobilized, followed shortly by an audible pop and a shocked, horror filled scream muffled by Kat’s boot crawled up the boy’s throat.

‘How many in your group?’ 

‘Uh, no, no, no, no, no. Come on, man.’ Randall felt the boot on his face pulling away, only to bang his head deeper into the broken wood, feeling the splinters piercing his right cheek. ‘Please, man, take her off of me!’

‘How many?!’ 

‘Uh, 30-- 30. 30 guys.’ 

Kat removed the boot from his face when he answered, taking a step back and watched him fall to the floor as his body started shaking uncontrollably.

‘Where?’ 

‘Uh... I don't know. I swear. We were never anyplace more than a night.’ 

She felt Daryl shifting behind her, listening to his footsteps as he got closer to her and Randall’s trembling frame.

‘Scouting? Planning on staying local?’ 

‘I- I don't know. They- they left me behind.’ 

‘Did you ever pick off a scab?’ She caught a glimpse of Daryl’s form stopping right next to her, both of them looking down at the frightened boy.

‘Come on, man! I'm-I'm trying to cooperate.’ Randall tried to back away from them, but it was futile as his back was already flushed against the wall.

‘Start real slow at first. Sooner or later, you've just gotta rip it off.’ Daryl reached his hand to Randall’s bandages, spitting the words slowly in his way, as he caught a glimpse of Kat’s already balled up fist.

‘Okay. Okay. They have weapons. Heavy stuff, automatics. But I didn't do anything. These- these people took me in. Not just guys. A whole group of 'em. Men and women, kids too. Just like you people. Thought I'd have a better chance with them, you know? But.. We go out. Just the men. One night, we- we found this little campsite.’

Kat could feel the rage flowing through her, listening closely as Randall began stuttering, trying to explain something, already knowing how his story would unfold. Her upper lip twitched in disgust, trying to keep herself cool headed before she would tear his face off.

‘A man and his two daughters. Teenagers, you know? Real young. Real cute. Their daddy had to watch while these guys- they- And they didn't even kill him afterwards. They just- They just made him watch as his daughters- They just-just- just left him there.’

Daryl’s fist flew past her before she could react, straight into Randall’s already swollen jaw, drawing a sharp pain filled scream our of him as the boy kept tugging at the chains in a pitiful way, trying to shelter himself away from the angry blows that kept coming his way, splitting his cheek open, as blood gushed down his face. Daryl saw Kat’s frame next to him, hard as a stone as the splattered blood reached her, before pulling himself away from the boy.

‘Please, please! Stop!! I didn't touch those girls. No, I swear I didn't- Please. Please. You gotta believe me, man. I'm not like that. I ain't like that. Please. Please, you gotta believe me.’

The blood gushing down from the cuts on his left side of the face mixed with the tears and spit, flowing slowly down his chin as Randall fell to the ground again, crying hysterically and screaming for mercy after Daryl backed away from him. 

**_Trigger warning ends here_ **

Kat was the first one to move towards the door, pushing it open until it snapped against the outside wall and as soon as she saw herself outside, her body started shaking while she tried to catch her breath. They both went much farther than what she had in mind. She let out a shaky breath, feeling her trembling fingers clutch absently at the dog tags around her neck, trying to leave that headspace.

She turned her head around, watching Daryl come out with her rifle resting on his shoulder, his hand wrapped around the thin strap. His knuckles were bloody, and she couldn’t tell if it was Randall’s blood or his. He stopped a few feet away from her, as she avoided looking him in the eyes.

‘Hey.’ Daryl took the strap off his shoulder extending his arm in front of him.

Kat nodded as she reached out to the strap held in front of her, but felt his fingers grab her hand just as she tried to retrieve her rifle.

‘Ya okay?’ 

Daryl took a step towards her, closing the space between then. He brushed his fingers under her chin, making her look at him. Her eyes were wide, concern written all over them, but warm as she met his gaze. 

‘I told you. I can’t take it back now.’ Kat’s voice was weak as she tried to smile, feeling the regret of letting him enter that damn cabin wash over her. She watched him frown for a second, before she felt his fingers pull away from her chin as he rested them on the nape of her neck, slowly brushing his thumb against the soft skin.

‘Me neither. Guess we have to sort it out together, right?’

Kat pushed herself on the tip of her boots, closing the space between them, gently pressing her lips against his, while his grip tightened around her hand as he kissed her back, feeling her heartbeat in her bottom lip as his teeth grazed it softly, leaving both of them breathless. She let herself fall back with her eyes still closed, feeling the warmness spread inside her chest. _Daryl was not disgusted by her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know what they say, a couple that tortures together, stays together. No? This weird ass voice in my head says I got it wrong, but alas  
> ~  
> Trigger warning recap : Kat and Daryl torture Randall, almost crippling the poor boy. Sorry, Randall.


	13. Can't take it back, part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had a hard time deciding if I should split this chapter in two, but I didn't want to lose the pivotal feeling that sets the right mood for the second part, so here I am, two days later with a chapter long enough for two~
> 
> Let me know if I somehow nailed my first attempt at smut and enjoy!

‘Let me guess. You two pulled a good cop bad cop on the kid?’ Shane was the first one to notice Kat and Daryl coming back to the camp, walking slowly next to each other. ‘No, wait. Good Russian spy and evil hunter? Did I get it right?’

Kat rolled her eyes at Shane’s words, watching Daryl step in front of her, walking faster towards the man, before she leaped forward in a failed attempt to grab Daryl’s arm.

‘Hey man, if ya have somethin’ to say, fuckin’ spit it out already.’

Glenn threw himself between them, holding Daryl back as Kat barely reached him, wrapping her fingers around his wrist in a small attempt to make him lower his fist, even though Shane deserved it entirely.

‘I’ve been fucking saying it since we bumped into her!’

‘Nah, man. Ya’ve been at her throat since day one without any reason.’ Daryl spat in his face, still trying to get past Glenn, only stopping at the tight squeeze around his wrist. 

That drew a loud scoff out of Shane and before he could say something else and make it worse, Rick’s shout filled the air around them, making them all wince but successfully drawing their attention back to the actual problem.

‘The boy there's got a gang, thirty men.’ Daryl exhaled deeply after lowering his fist, letting Kat place her small hands around it, soft fingers caressing his until he let go and her fingertips slipped down the back of his hand through his in a loose handhold, avoiding to touch the scraped skin on his knuckles. 

‘They have heavy artillery and they aren’t looking to make friends.’ Kat shook her head at the group in defeat, as she saw only one way out of the Randall situation.

‘They roll through here, our boys are dead. And our women, they're gonna—‘Daryl’s voice faltered for a second, his fingers squeezing Kat’s involuntarily as he turned his head to his right, glancing down at her small frame, before looking back at the group. ‘They're gonna wish they were.’ 

‘What did you two do?’ Dale’s concerned voice made them both glance quickly in his way, seeing him shake his head, but was met by a short silence as Kat and Daryl shared a short knowing look.

‘Had a little chat.’ Daryl’s tone was flat, as he turned his head back to the group, his thumb gently stroking the side of Kat’s hand.

‘Boy might need some medical attention.’ Kat cocked an eyebrow at Hershel, biting down on her lower lip.

‘Might?’

Kat cleared her throat, looking at the confused looks thrown their way. ‘Yeah, might. As in if we decide to kill him, he actually might not need it.’ There. It had been said. The thought made most of them visibly uncomfortable and sick to their stomach, but it was one of the only two options available, and only one of them was somehow protecting their group. 

She watched Rick pace around for a couple of seconds, before wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. ‘No one goes near this guy. We have no choice. He's a threat. We have to eliminate the threat.’ 

‘You're just gonna kill him?’ Carol’s small voice drew everyone’s attention, but the concerned look on her face was directed at Kat and Daryl.

‘It's settled. I'll do it today.’ Rick jabbed his finger at nothing in particular, before walking away from the group. It was a heavy decision that surely took its toll on him, but it was the most logical one.

Kat pulled Daryl’s arm softly, cocking her head back, silently asking them to leave and be alone for a bit, as the group started scattering around the camp. He absently adjusted the strap of his crossbow on his shoulder, nodding down at her, walking away with their fingers still wrapped up against each other’s hand in a loose way. 

They stopped by the pile of hay between Daryl’s tent and the house, as Kat let go of his hand and let herself lean against the hay, slowly dropping down to the ground in a sitting position, watching her feet slide against the dirt, while Daryl absently picked at one of his slightly bent arrows. Kat let her head fall back and lit up a cigarette, exhaling the smoke while gazing at the sky.

The comfortable silence around them came to a halt, as Daryl eyed Dale’s frame coming in their direction. He took a few steps back, watching Dale go past Kat’s curled up body, stopping in front of him. 

‘Carol sent you?’ 

‘Carol's not the only one that's concerned about you two, your new roles in the group.’ Dale turned her head, looking at the way Kat gazed at the sky, puffing away her cigarette like she was in some sort of a trance. 

‘Oh, man, I don't need my head shrunk. This group's broken.’ The arrow in his hand snapped from where he tried to straighten it, jerking his arm and throwing it aside. ‘I'm better off like this. We both are. Me and Kat.’ 

‘So live or die, you don't care what happens to Randall?’

‘Nope.’ 

‘Kat?’ Dale turned his head again, hoping to get an answer out of her.

Kat dropped her head, eyeing Dale as his pleading look searched any type of emotion on her face. She shook her head, pushing her lower lip into an indifferent curve, dragging another smoke out of the cigarette.

‘No, not really.’

‘Then why not stand with me, try to save the kid's life, if it really doesn't matter one way or the other to either of you?’

‘Didn't peg ya for a desperate son of a bitch.’ Daryl squinted at him, drawing a bitter chuckle out of Kat.

‘Your opinions make a difference. Look, you cared about what happened to Sophia. Cared what it meant to the group. Torturing people? That isn't you.’ Dale gestured widely at both of them, his eyes darting between Kat and Daryl. ‘And you? You're a decent man. So is Rick. Shane- He's different.’ 

‘Why's that? 'Cause he killed Otis?’ 

Daryl’s words made Kat snap her head in their way again, silently eyeing him as she put out the remains of her cigarette. ‘He told you that? ‘

‘He told some story. How Otis covered him, saved his ass. He showed up with the dead guy's gun. Rick ain't stupid. If he didn't figure that out, it's 'cause he didn't wanna. It's like I said, group's broken.’

Dale shook his head, turning back and facing Kat before walking back to the house with a defeated look darkening his face.

Kat let her head fall back again, hearing Daryl’s footsteps closing in before dropping next to her, leaning against the pile of hay. She let her head drop on his shoulder, eyes closed as she felt his lips press against her forehead before she drifted off to sleep.

Next thing she was aware of was the feeling of gentle fingers brushing away the hairs on her face and patting them back where they belonged on the sides, framing her cheeks.

‘Hey.’

‘Hey.’ Her answer was almost a whisper, still trying to open her eyes, but her eyelids felt too heavy. ‘I fell asleep?’

‘Yeah. Been snoring next to me for half an hour already.’

Kat’s eyes snapped open way too sudden, turning the desired offended look on her face into a small pout as she looked up at Daryl. She watched him smirk down at her, before getting up, a hand shoved in her face, helping her back on her feet.

‘Not even gonna mention the way you drooled.’

‘Asshole.’ Kat shook her head as an amused smile mirroring Daryl’s crept up her lips, grabbing the hand in front of her. ‘Where to?’

She watched his face get all serious as she let him pull her up, shaking her head questioningly at the sudden change.

‘Rick wants us to gather up back at the house.’ Daryl bit on the inside of his lower lip as he let his hand slide up and down Kat’s bare arm.

She nodded, realizing what that meant, lazily rubbing away the sleep out of her eyes before cocking her head towards the camp as she started walking to the house with Daryl by her side.

By the time they entered the living room, everyone else was gathered around, a grim and heavy feeling setting inside the four walls as no one made a sound. They both stopped under the large arcade, leaning against each side of its frame, behind Rick.

‘So how do we do this? Just take a vote?’ 

Kat listened closely at their conversation as a deep scowl set on her face, letting her head fall against the wall with a small thud. As much as she disliked killing, she could see from a mile away that this was the best solution. 

‘We could hang him, right? Just snap his neck.’

‘Shooting may be more humane.’ 

Kat scoffed, shaking her head and drawing their attention.

‘You all think of those painless deaths but all of them include one thing you’re overlooking on purpose, trying to make yourselves look more humane.’ Kat’s upper lip trembled in disgust as she watched everyone going silent. ‘It’s the anticipation, it’s as bad as physical pain would be from a violent death.’ She glanced away, avoiding the guilty looks thrown her way before hearing Shane snicker.

‘We’re getting schooled by a professional killer. Man, do you feel the irony?’ Shane crossed his arms against his chest, silently staring at Kat across the room. ‘How would you do it?’

‘And what about the body? Do we bury him?’ Daryl changed the topic quickly, not letting that conversation go on, fully knowing that Shane might try and use it against Kat.

‘Hold on, hold on! You're talking about this like it's already decided.’ Dale’s voice broke as he looked around, making Kat turn her head back to the group. ‘If we do this, the people that we were, the world that we knew is dead. And this new world is ugly. It's.. Harsh.’ 

‘It's survival of the fittest. Please. Let's just do what's right. Isn't there anybody else who's gonna stand with me?’ Dale looked around again, tears swelling at the corners of his eyes as no other hand was raised. ‘Are y'all gonna watch, too? No, you'll go hide your heads in your tents and try to forget that we're slaughtering a human being. I won't be a party to it.’ 

Kat’s heart broke a little as she watched the old man storm away past her, tears silently falling down his cheeks, caused by their unwillingness of sparing a possible innocent human being, a kid she had tortured knowingly, a kid that begged for mercy while being held in chains. She locked eyes with Daryl, feeling the guilt panging deep inside her stomach.

*

Keeping watch, Kat squinted in the dark around the camp. She was met by nothing but eerie silence, everyone who didn’t want to be part of the execution silently keeping themselves busy with different chores or hiding away inside their tents. She tilted her head in confusion gazing towards the barn, as the men dragged Randall outside. There was no gunshot, he was alive. The boy was pushed around, still on his feet, thing that made her frown deeply. Rick couldn’t do it. 

She felt her feet move on their own, trying to catch up with Daryl and Shane as they pushed and pulled a blindfolded Randall back to the wooden cabin, before Rick shook his head walking towards her, signaling her not to go after them.

‘I couldn’t. Carl was there. He told me to do it.’ Rick was suddenly met by Lori’s gentle arms wrapped around him. ‘I just- I couldn’t do it.’ 

‘It’s okay.’ Lori shushed him, gently caressing his face, trying to calm him down.

Kat stopped, seeing the disturbed look on Rick’s face at the thought of his own son seeing him executing someone else, at the thought of his baby boy telling him to kill someone in front of him. The humanity, the civilization, everything seemed so hard to grasp, so far away in that moment. 

A shock filled cry echoed through the air, making the blood in her veins freeze as her eyes locked with Rick’s. ‘What was that?’

‘What happened?’ Daryl’s yell remembered her how to breathe again, catching a faint glimpse of his and Shane’s running silhouettes. 

‘I don't know- Go! ‘ 

‘Kat, you got your rifle? T-Dog grab a shotgun!’

Kat didn’t know who shouted it, the words fading way quickly, but her feet had a mind of their own again as she jumped over the rusty fence and continued sprinting through the field that spread out in front of the house, her heavy loud breaths crawling up her throat deafening her.

Her eyes locked on the filthy silhouette on top of Dale as the pain filled scream made everything inside her crumble to pieces. Kat let out a shaky groan before leaping in front of her, tackling the walker and rolling on the ground with it away from Dale. Straddling the horrendous creature, Kat pulled out her hunting knife, plunging it repeatedly into its rotten skull, feeling the rage and horror spreading through her veins like wildfire as the corpse under her went limp.

‘He won't make the trip.’ 

Kat turned her head at the group unsure if she had heard right, catching her breath as she rose to her feet, splattering the blood off the blade while stumbling towards Dale’s bloodied form. His stomach was torn wide open, blood gushing out as the man’s guts threatened to spill. 

‘Oh, no, no!’ She dropped to her knees next to him, softly trying to caress the sides of his head in a desperate attempt to understand what was happening, but her hands were shaking, wandering frantically around Dale’s head.

‘Do something, please!’ Andrea’s crying plea made Kat shake her head mournfully, feeling her bottom lip quivering.

‘Oh, God. He's suffering!’ Kat’s voice broke again, her hands trembled on each side of Dale’s head, not knowing what to do, feeling the helplessness and terror crawling under her skin.

‘Do something! Come on!’ 

‘Oh, God.’ Looking down at him as the tears damped her cheeks, she felt him move his head, pressing his forehead against the gun pointed at him, his eyes locked on Daryl’s. 

‘I'm sorry, brother.’

Kat let go, her hands falling weak to the ground, keeping her eyes glued to Dale’s face, flinching faintly at the gunshot as small droplets of blood splattered across the front of her shirt. She watched the compassion, the empathy, the reasoning and the light that Dale’s eyes tried to see in this apocalyptic world fade away.

Then silence settled in, mournful faces all around the group, carrying Dale’s lifeless body away after a white sheet was gently draped around it, letting the aftermath take its toll on each of them.

The way back to camp was blurry, everything Kat passed by was fading away slowly into gruesome shadows and odd shapes, making her snap her head to her sides once in a while. By the time she reached Daryl’s tent, she noticed him lingering next to her at the entrance. He had walked by her side all along, but she couldn’t see him, not even once.

Kat bent down silently, unzipping the tent’s entrance and threw herself on the soft blanket without taking off her boots or straps or belts, not even wanting to think about the bloodied knife hanged on her thigh, blinking away the tears that never stopped flowing, as she turned on her side and curled into a ball, facing Daryl’s pillow.

She watched his crouched frame coming in after her, zipping up the entrance and dropping next to her into a sitting position, their eyes not meeting even once. She felt strong hands unfastening the straps of her boots, pulling them off before throwing them into a corner carelessly. She sensed gentle fingers tugging at the straps fastened on her right thigh, softly brushing on her bare skin, working their way up to her hips as the tightened belts dropped loose, from her body to the blanket, one after the other. 

Kat reached her hand to his back, letting it slide down his side slowly, before tracing the angel wings, feeling him flinch under her touch but he didn’t pull away. She tugged gently at the leather vest, pulling it down his arms as he slightly rolled his shoulders to help her. Kat propped herself up on her right elbow, folding the leather vest silently, before putting it behind her on the supply bags.

Daryl’s hand rested on her thigh, as he turned to look at her and his bent knee gently bumped against hers, puffy red eyes slowly meeting his. He laid next to her, without tearing his eyes from her face as he softly slid his hand on her clothed hip, rubbing his thumb absently across the small patch of bare skin above the waistband of her short jeans. 

Kat let out a shaky breath at the feeling, reaching her small hand out to brush her fingertips down his cheek, tracing his jawline slowly before she rested her palm on the side of his neck. She shifted closer to him, feeling the tears roll down the bridge of her nose, as she leaned in and placed her lips in a gentle kiss on his cheek, lingering there for a long second. Kat tilted her head, brushing her lower lip down his jaw, before pressing an open kiss on the soft skin under his ear. 

She heard his breath hitch, as he dug his fingers in the fabric of her shorts, his thumb sinking into the soft skin above their waistband. Kat let out a soft moan brush against his skin, her lips peppering his jawline with open kisses. 

Pulling away just enough to meet her gaze, Daryl brushed the tip of his nose down her cheek, before dipping his head between her neck and shoulder, feeling lightheaded as her sweet scent invaded all his senses. He pressed a kiss on the small curve, feeling her shudder under his touch, before tracing the frail line of her neck with his lips, stopping on the soft skin behind her ear.

Kat watched him pull away again, watery eyes searching his desperately and silently pleading, too afraid he would stop. But he didn’t. She felt his lips crash against hers and it was like nothing she ever felt him kiss her before. It was sloppy and heavy, full of raw emotions she hadn’t felt unfolding ever before and made her mind turn blank. 

His teeth grazed her lower lip before sinking in the soft flesh, drawing a faint moan out of her. Taking advantage of her parted lips, his tongue plunged between them, gently tracing their soft curve before meeting hers halfway, as he suddenly pushed her on her back. 

Her arms wrapped around his neck as soon as her back hit the blanket, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. Her fingers tugged greedily at the short hairs on the back of his head, feeling the way her blood fanatically run through her veins, setting her body on fire. Her tears kept flowing, down her temples and into her hairline, dampening her roots and she couldn’t stop them from spilling.

His hand worked its way up under her loose shirt, fingers digging desperately in the soft skin of her waist, taking in every curve and every dip, burning it in his memory. He felt her arms pull away from around his neck as he pulled back to catch his breath, watching her watery eyes fall on his chest. Small shaky fingers clawed desperately at the button of his shirt as she worked her way down, pushing the fabric off his shoulders as soon as she was done.

Daryl pulled away, clawing at his own shirt to take it off like it burnt his flesh, throwing it in the corner of the tent, before he placed his hand on the waistband of Kat’s shorts. His eyes searched for hers, looking for any faint sign of her changing her mind, but was met by a view that sent shivers down his spine in a way he had never felt before. In the faint moonlight coming through, Kat’s hair was sprawled on the pillow in a perfect yet chaotic way, her loose braid looping down the pillow. Her watery eyes were glazed over and even in the dark, he could see the faint tears streaming down her temples, as she nodded breathlessly. 

She inhaled sharply, as Daryl’s fingers curled around her waist band, gently grazing the skin under it, sending shivers down her belly. Kat helped him take her shorts off, leaving her only in her white boxers. She barely pushed herself up in front of him, as her hands were already fumbling with his belt, trying to take it off, pushing his pants down with a desperate tug.

Daryl let her take off his belt as he dipped lower, crashing his lips against hers in a frantic, open mouthed kiss, while his hands tugged at the hem of her loose shirt, pulling away only to yank the fabric away from her body and throwing it away.

His lips met hers again as he pushed himself on top of her, the back of her head hitting the pillow in the blink of an eye. His mouth strayed away, leaving her breathless as his teeth grazed the nape of her neck before sinking in her shoulder, drawing a loud moan out of her. 

She felt his hands trailing the sides of her waist before cupping her bare breasts, softly squeezing them, while his tongue darted across the faint bitemark on her shoulder, a sharp moan crawling up her throat as she pushed her chest into his hands, slightly twitching under his touch.

Her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him back to face her, pressing his forehead against hers as they both tried to catch their breath.

‘Please. _Please, love._ ’

His eyes met hers and as soon as the words left her lips in that faint moan, something inside him got its lid popped open. His right hand snapped between them, tugging at her boxers with more need than he had imagined, while his left one wrapped around her bare legs one at a time, pushing them up as he slid off her panties. 

Kat let her legs fall back slowly, on each side of his hips, watching him pull down the hem of his boxers. Her body was shaking as she reached out her arms, wrapping them tightly around his neck, desperate for his touch. 

Daryl pressed his forehead against hers, the back of his fingers gently caressing her cheek, wiping away the tears. His other hand was tensed between them, guiding his throbbing erection to her core, holding himself back only to watch her nod desperately as she bit down on her lower lip. He felt her shift under him, jerking her hips involuntarily, in a desperate attempt for more friction. He pushed the tip between her lips, sliding it up and down painfully slow, as his breath hitched, and he let out a low growl at the wetness that met him.

He heard her shaky gasp, watching her close her eyes wide shut at the small contact. He brushed his fingertips down her cheek, making her open her eyes again as he pushed himself into her in an agonizingly slow stroke. A low, throaty moan left his lips, trying to hold himself back, taking in the image in front of him.

Kat’s eyes rolled to the back of her head, her parted lips slightly quivering as her breath got stuck inside her throat. Her nails dug deep into Daryl’s shoulders as her hips twitched at the feeling of being filled up so suddenly, so deeply, so greedily.

Daryl let himself fall completely on top of her, his mind going utterly blank, feeling the way her walls contracted around him, not caring about what would cross his mind in different circumstances where he’s be too afraid that he’d crush her frail looking form with his body. He needed this. They both needed this.

No words. No useless chat. Nothing but the deep need of feeling each other, the raw emotions that set both their minds in a blank space, the craving of closeness only she was able to satisfy.

He shifted on top of her, feeling him pulling out slowly and before any whimper could get past her lips, she felt him snap his hips against hers, filling her up again, and again, and again. With each stroke, he hit a spot inside her that made her throw her head back, whimpering and moaning, begging him for more. She felt his lips on the side of her neck as he pounded relentlessly into her and his teeth savagely sunk in the soft flesh, drawing a sharp moan filled with both pleasure and pain out of her.

His fingers dug deep into the soft flesh of her thigh, listening to her breathy, lewd moans filling the air between them, joined by the skin slapping sound his hips made against hers, as he licked away the blood off her neck, gently sucking on the abused skin here and there.

She turned her head to the side, desperate lips kissing every patch of skin of Daryl’s shoulder they could reach, tongue darting across the nape of his neck and down his collarbone, sucking on the soft skin as the man let out a feral growl.

She found his lips, raising her head to reach them, only to be pushed back into the pillow as he crashed his lips against hers. He felt her teeth sink in his lower lip, tugging it to the side as a sharp jolt of pain spread through it before she let go. 

He felt her legs starting trembling around his hips and her insides twitched around him, squeezing him in a way that made him see white in front of his eyes. One of his hands grabbed her hip, as his fingers sunk into her flesh

'Kat. '

Daryl watched her nod desperately under him, as her nails dug into his shoulders, deep enough to draw blood. He let his head fall back down between her neck and shoulder, as he sped up his thrusts, feeling her arch her back under him. 

His teeth sunk into her shoulder again, pushing her over the edge, letting out a loud hoarse moan, as the sudden spasms spread through her entire body like a tidal wave and her eyes rolled to the back of her head, riding out her orgasm while he thrusted wildly inside her. 

Kat felt him shudder on top of her, flinching as he moved inside her overstimulated folds, before he snapped his hips against her harder than he intended, as he wasn’t in control of his body anymore. That drew out a small cry out of her as he came inside, filling her up to the last drop, grinding his hips against hers as he rode out his orgasm.

She let go of his shoulders as he crashed on top of her, gentle fingers drawing lazy patterns across his back, feeling the raised skin of his scars as she traced them silently, letting them both come back from their high.

The only sound echoing around them was that of their ragged breaths, as she moved one of her hands to the back of his head, slowly caressing the short hair back into place, her fingernails dragging across his scalp in a calming gesture. 

Daryl placed a small kiss on her bruised shoulder before raising his head up to look at her. Her bedroom eyes sent sparks of electricity down to his groin, feeling himself twitch inside her. The heartbreaking look she had on her face earlier faded away, her tears were dried up, all replaced by a faint smile as she looked up at him. His hand left her waist, only to gently brush away the hairs out of her face.

She felt him shift on top of her, a deep sigh leaving her lips as soon as he pulled out, leaving her feeling empty. Kat watched him drop on his side, facing her, as he pulled the blanket over their naked bodies. His arm pulled her against him, softly patting her head to his chest to rest his chin on top of it, before falling lazily around her covered waist.  



	14. Damn broad

Kat woke up at the sound of the zipper being pulled open. She let out a low growl, feeling the soreness that shot through her entire body as she tried to curl herself around the soft blanket, prolonging the warm feeling wrapped around her naked body. She blinked lazily at the entrance as soon as she noticed the emptiness she was met with in Daryl’s side of the bed. 

He was crouched at the entrance, one hand pushing away the fabric just enough so he could see inside the tent. Kat noticed he was already dressed up and he must have been up for a while now, her eyes picking the faint dirt that was smudged all over his cheeks and forehead. Her gaze slid to his lips, eyeing the small bruise on the bottom one where she had bit him last night, and everything came back to her in the split of a second, sending her blood rushing through her veins straight to her core, trying to push down the tight vice her heart was stuck into. 

Daryl watched her cheeks turn a bright pink, spreading over her freckled face and down her neck, eyeing the goddamn submissive way she unknowingly exposed the soft, bruised skin, way that made his mind drift away, her naked body shuddering under him, them lustful eyes rolled in the back of her head, quivering swollen lips parted for him to hear her whimpers, all in a damn flash passing in front of his eyes. _Fuck._

Kat heard him clear his throat, as she pushed herself into a sitting position, draping the blanket around her shoulders and chest in the process.

‘We’re ready.’ 

‘You should have woken me up.’ Her own voice made her a tad confused, blinking lazily as her raspy tone broke around the words leaving her still swollen lips. ‘To help.’

‘It’s okay. Took care of it.’ Daryl bit the inside of his lower lip absently, before nodding at her to get dressed and zipped up the tent halfway to give her some privacy.

After a couple of minutes, Kat emerged from the tent, scowling as she fastened the belts and straps around her hips and thighs. Daryl puffed on a cigarette, letting his eyes roam on her exposed skin, watching small fingers yanking mercilessly at the leather straps. He felt a smirk tugging at his lips, eyeing the fingerprint-like fresh bruises on her left thigh, where he grabbed her last night. A sense of guilt mixed with pride, that he couldn’t quite grasp crawled under his skin, watching her push the disheveled braid from her shoulder to fall on her back. The loose shirt draped around her fully revealed the bitemarks on the nape of her neck, where his teeth had sunk in the heat of the moment, as he faintly remembered hearing her cry out in pain.

He was aware that he may have went a little overboard, but it didn’t seem to bother her and sure as hell it didn’t bother him. It was exactly what both of them needed in that moment. He tapped a lazy finger against the half-spent cigarette, jerking his arm questioningly at Kat as soon as she finished equipping herself. She reached out for the burning cigarette, her lungs inhaling greedily the smoke as soon as her lips closed around it in a small pout.

The funeral was short, gentle looks thrown around the group as Rick spoke fondly of the man they just lost, amused puffy eyes meeting each other knowingly, as the man mentioned how Dale got under people’s skin, each of them experiencing it at some point. Kat glued her eyes to the grave next to Sophia’s, gently wiping away the smudged dirt from the back of Daryl’s hand. She remembered briefly how she jumped between Dale and the walkers, back at the CDC. It felt like a lifetime ago and even if back then it seemed like a rash decision, Kat knew she’d have done it all over again without even blinking. Dale had been one of the good things in this broken world.

‘He said this group was broken. The best way to honor him is to unbreak it. Set aside our differences and pull together. Our safety. Our future. We're not broken. We're gonna prove him wrong. From now on... We're gonna do it his way. That is how we honor Dale.’ 

Rick’s speech was met with both open hearts and open minds, as Kat let her head fall on Daryl’s shoulder, looking at every person gathered around. Her eyes met Shane’s briefly. He gave her a short nod, pressing his lips in a thin line, before tearing his gaze away from hers, leaving her wondering what was that about.

*

Kat jumped off the RV, watching the blue truck pull next to the other cars. After the funeral, they laid out a plan to take a short trip around the farm’s boarders in order to check if any other walkers had come through, while the others started piling up all their supplies in order to move into the house. Kat had taken over keeping watch and stayed behind, leaving it to Daryl, Shane, Andrea and T-Dog to handle the walkers. Most of them needed to blow off some steam after the previous night, especially Andrea.

Daryl had already hopped out from the truck’s bed and he was walking towards her, crossbow on his back, blood splattered all over him, smoldering look like he always got going on that ridiculously handsome face of his, looking like a damn apocalyptic god and Kat could only grin like a dumb teenager in love at that view.

‘Them shit eatin’ grins back in place I see.’ His voice was carrying that sarcastic edge of his, but a half smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he passed by her small frame.

‘Can’t a girl smile anymore around here?’ Kat turned on her heels, following suite. She cocked a thin eyebrow at him as her hands settled on her hips, trying to look offended. She saw him shake his head, but he didn’t entertain her with an answer.

‘Hey, really. You good?’ Kat reached out to his arm, small fingers tugging gently at the fabric of his shirt.

Daryl stopped and turned around to face her. He was doing that thing he always did when thinking hard about something, biting the inside of his lower lip absently.

‘Look, if it’s about last night-‘

He watched amused, her face turning a couple different colors as she frowned looking down, trying to explain something, flustered and confident at the same time like a damn kid and seeing this side of her, he couldn’t help the smirk threatening to spread on his face.

‘I’m good.’ Daryl leaned in, pressing his lips on the top of her hair, before pulling away. ‘Lots of shit to do ‘round here, so move that lazy ass.’ 

Wide green eyes shot up meeting his briefly before he walked away, leaving Kat frozen like a deer in the headlights. She was baffled at the way he could turn from being so gentle to a huge asshole sometimes, but she puckered her lips into a small smile at the thought, because that was indeed part of his charm. 

She suddenly became aware of her surroundings and could actually feel various side glances thrown at her and hear a few snickers, coming mostly from Maggie. The girl winked at her when their eyes met, forcing Kat to raise a questioning eyebrow. 

‘What?’

Her question was met by another snicker, shared between Andrea and Maggie this time, making Kat frown at the weird duo in front of her. Her eyes moved on Andrea’s frame, watching the woman pull the handgun secured on her belt before throwing it in the bag of guns.

‘We were wondering if-‘ Maggie gestured to her own neck, biting her lips in order to hide her cheeky grin. 

‘Maggie here was wondering if Dixon bites are as dangerous as walker bites.’ Andrea’s swollen eyes squinted at Kat, as a devious smile spread on the woman’s face up to her cheeks.

Kat let out a chuckle, grinning towards the two airheads in front of her as Glenn must have heard part of their conversation, because he was frowning at the three of them.

‘Walker bite? Who’s bit?’ While Glenn’s concerned tone made the small group snicker, Kat caught a glimpse of Shane going in the direction of the wooden cabin.

‘Maggie was just telling us about one of her fetishes, nothing important.’ Kat’s ears picked on a faint chuckle behind her while she threw the rifle’s strap on her shoulder, before she placed a hand on Glenn’s shoulder, patting it lightly as she pushed past him. ‘Now move your ass to work, my shift on keeping watch just ended.’

She walked away from the group, leaving Glenn to freeze on his feet and blush like an idiot. God, she had so much fun tormenting that boy sometimes. Shaking her head trying to brush it off, Kat patted herself absently, feeling the hunting knives in place before letting her loose shirt cover the one strapped to her hip as she walked towards the cabin, trying figure out what Shane was up to, because she was pretty sure it was no good.

The wooden door opened slowly, forcing Kat to leap sideways behind a small pile of hay. Thin brows furrowed as she watched Shane looking left and right while pushing a blindfolded Randall out of the cabin, before taking a right turn, circling the cabin and disappearing silently into the woods. _What the hell._

Her mind was going in circles, trying to decide if going back and tell everyone about it would be the best decision or not, but her feet were already pushing her into the woods. _Shit_. She had to stop being so reckless. 

Kat paused briefly, green eyes searching for fresh tracks before silently rushing deeper into the woods. Her body froze in its place as she caught a glimpse of Shane cutting through the ropes around Randall’s wrists. Making as less noise as possible, Kat moved behind the trees, trying to get closer and hopefully be able to hear what they were saying.

The boy raised to his feet with a grateful look on his face, as Kat got closer. Shane seemed to be trying to help him escape. Kat frowned at the image in front of her, something didn’t feel right and then she stopped dead in her tracks with her mouth hung open. Everything from that point on came crashing down on her like a cruel joke, wide eyes watching Randall walking away, while Shane’s hands jerked his head from behind with a loud cracking noise. 

‘ _Черт возьми-_ ’

‘Kat.’ Shane was visibly startled seeing her, turning around to face her, slowly taking his hands away from the boy’s broken neck. The body fell limp to the ground with a sickening thud. His jaw was tensed, moving his eyes away from Randall’s lifeless body to the woman standing frozen a few feet away from of him. 

Kat reached out for her rifle, slowly, not breaking the eye contact. She felt cornered and her mind went into a frenzy, trying to guess Shane’s next move.

‘You understand, don’t you? He was dangerous. You’d have done the same, right?’ Shane’s words made her falter for a second, her head slightly nodding in a confused way, letting go of her rifle. That was her only mistake, she had let her guard down, against the feeling in her own guts. 

She blinked and her back hit painfully against one of the trees, feeling nauseated. Shane’s fist dug deep under her ribs, while he grabbed her braid and yanked her head to the side. Kat clawed at his face, nails digging deep enough to draw blood, and as soon as she felt an opening, Kat dragged her fingernails across his cheek feeling his skin tear under her fingertips, open wounds gushing red blood all over his neck and dripping down her forearm.

Shane let out a muffled growl, letting go of her hair while his fist swung straight into her jaw, sending her body stumbling a few feet away from him. Kat rolled on her back, keeping him in her field of vision, clawing desperately at the strap on her arm, trying to take out the rifle from under her.

But it was too late, Shane leaped in her direction and tried to kick her in the stomach. His foot missed her by an inch as she rolled over frantically and grabbed the rifle only to be yanked away from her hands and thrown somewhere outside her reach. 

Kat locked her right leg around Shane’s calf, screaming as she swung her left one against the back of his knees, hitting him with every bit of strength she could muster, sending him to his knees next to her. She grabbed his shirt to steady herself and punched him in the stomach, drawing another pain filled growl from the man. Kat grabbed at the air around her thigh, searching desperately for the hilt of her hunting knife.

Shane grabbed both her arms and pushed her off him, slamming her body hard against the ground. Kat’s eyes rolled in the back of her head for a second, before being able to breathe again. She felt Shane’s hands around her neck, but her vision went from bad to worse in the split of a second, struggling to breathe again.

‘Kat, you are dangerous as well. You understand that too, right?’ Shane straddled her, his thumbs digging deep into Kat’s neck.

‘From the moment you opened your mouth, something didn’t add up, man. You said the supposed woman in your made-up story died naturally and turned? Without being bitten?’ Shane scoffed, scowling down at her, while tightening his grip around her neck. ‘Are you sure you didn’t kill her yourself? Like you killed those guys in town? Are you sure you won’t do that to us too? Because lemme tell you. I ain’t.’

Kat tried to make sense of what he was saying, but she couldn’t focus, clawing at his arms and hands, scratching him hysterically, not wanting to die, not like this, not by his hands, _not now_. But the strength was leaving her body quickly, she was out of air and with no real chance against Shane. She thought about Daryl in that moment, remembering the way they held hands for the first time. The way he touched her, so carefully and so gentle. Daryl who was kissing the top of her head while she slept next to him. Her Daryl. Her hands stopped clawing at Shane’s frame, falling limp to the ground, green eyes watching the indifference on his bloody face. 

‘And when you came out of the cabin, clean and all, but Randall was- I’ve seen him. The things you’re capable of- There’s no room for you in this group, Kat.’ Shane’s knees pressed on the side of her thighs, preventing her to try and wriggle away. ‘And that damn redneck-‘ he let out a scoff, shaking his head. ‘You pro’lly fucked him into submission, man’s goin’ around and backin’ you up like a damn broad. But I know what you are, Kat.’

She felt her consciousness slipping away, trying to grasp on whatever Shane was spitting at her, but everything seemed so fuzzy. Redneck? Oh, right. Daryl. _Daryl_. Kat felt a bitter chuckle crawl up her throat, choking her from the inside. It was a pretty lie that life flashes right before your eyes when you die. The only things coming back to her revolved around someone else, blurry flashes coming and going, the way he looked at her that night, back at the camp, the grief and hurt in those blue eyes looking at her like she was a dead man walking. He told her not to pull that shit again. She felt disappointed, if anything. She was letting him down, strangled to death by none other than Shane.

No. _Fuck no_. She won’t go down like this. Snapping back to reality, Kat reached for the knife hanging on her hip, as her vision went from Shane’s face to a fuzzy black over and over again. As soon as she felt the hilt still under her shirt, Kat pulled the knife out and stabbed Shane in the shoulder, pulling the blade out as blood gushed over his arm, scowling as she missed his neck by a few inches. 

Shane stumbled to the side, howling in pain as he let go of Kat’s neck. She crawled away from him on all fours, trying to stand up but falling back to the ground every few feet. She didn’t want to look back, she didn’t want to see if he got up, she didn’t want to see how close he was. Kat ran as fast as she could, then a silent gunshot covered the sound of her footsteps and her body froze. She dropped to her knees, watching the blood flowing from her right thigh. 

She turned her head to see Shane holding her rifle, stumbling towards her. Kat’s cheeks dampened with tears as she muffled her cries, trying to get back on her feet and as soon as the sole of her boots touched the ground she started limping away, as fast as she could, not looking back. She heard Shane’s voice echoing through the trees somewhere far, but she didn’t stop. She had to keep running.


	15. Morning, sunshine

He didn’t know if it was self-control or some kind of them divine powers that stopped him dead in his tracks, but all Daryl could think about was how to knock the wind out of the motherfucker in front of him. Someone noticed Randall wasn’t in the cabin anymore earlier that day, they had searched around the cabin, the barn, the house and there was no damn trace of the boy, Kat or the son of a bitch that was now right in front of him, all bloodied and bruised looking like he got the beating of his life.

‘So ya mean to tell me that Kat. Kat helped the boy escape and she ran away with him.’ It wasn’t a question and he just wanted the son of a bitch to go through that shit again. Daryl scoffed, still glued in his place as the rest of the group, listening to Shane’s story. ‘Man, ya’re full of shit.’

‘Brother. The woman is crazy, I’m tellin’ you.’ Shane wiped the blood off his cheek, scowling at the sudden pain spreading through his face and shoulder. ‘Look at me, man. The bitch tried to kill me, I tried to stop them. This?’ He pointed at the four open wounds on his jaw, still oozing fresh blood. ‘She tried to rip my face off with her _bare hands_.’

Daryl felt like something knocked the wind out of his lungs, but a dark chuckle crawled out of them instead. He snapped his head to the side, shaking it in disbelief, eyes darting deep into the woods around them. Shane was full of shit and he knew it. ‘If that woman-‘ He turned his head back to Shane, walking in his direction before jabbing a finger in his face. ‘If Kat wanted ya dead, ya’d be fuckin’ pushin’ daisies already, man. Which means it ain’t the truth that’s comin’ out yer goddamn mouth.’

He felt someone pulling at his arm, stopping him to get any closer to Shane. Daryl yanked his arm away, not taking his eyes off the goddamn prick, taking a few steps back.

‘And the gunshot? It was a gunshot; I swear I heard it faintly just before you showed up. Only one.’ 

Daryl chewed on his bottom lip hard enough to split it back open, feeling the coppery taste on the tip of his tongue. He watched the color from Shane’s face drain away for a second at Glenn’s question. 

‘That was her. Woman tried to shoot me with that stupid rifle of hers when I found ‘em. Both are armed. Kid got my gun too.’ 

Shane’s eyes were stuck on him as he spit out the words, like he was trying to provoke him. Them thoughts were running in circles in his mind, because he couldn’t wrap his head around what Shane was sayin’. The man was lying. If Kat shot at him, he would’ve been dead.

Rick paced around for a few seconds, trying to decide their next move. They were already in the woods, they had to search for them. ‘It means they ain’t got too far.’ 

‘Ya can’t be serious. She ain’t the type to do what he just said.’ Daryl snapped at him, feeling the rage spreading through his veins. What the hell was wrong with these people.

‘Daryl. We split and search for them. You two go left, we take the right. After that we can settle it, you with me?’ 

He felt Rick’s hand tapping on his shoulder and it took all the self-control he could muster not to punch the man in the face. But as much as it pissed him off, he was right on one thing. If Kat was out there, he could find her. No, she was out there, and he would find her, even if he had to turn all them fucking rocks upside down in the woods.

Daryl shot one last glare towards Shane, before turning on his heel and walking away without another word, Glenn following him suite. He knew he would find her and god be damned if he won’t tear a new one to that lying son of a bitch after he’ll get Kat back to tell them all the fucking truth.

Daryl shot up a hand in the air, making Glenn stop suddenly behind him. Bloodshot blue eyes roamed around the ground, searching for fresh tracks, but there was nothing. Not a damn leaf turned sideways that could catch his eye, no fucking rock moved from its place, nothing. The sun was about to set and he couldn’t find any fresh tracks, in the dark it would’ve been even worse. 

‘This is pointless.’ Daryl scowled at the ground, frustration seeping through. There was nothing. Absolutely fucking nothing. They were on the wrong side of the woods. It had to be that. He started walking back to where they had started from, they had to cover more ground and quickly. Them wounds on Shane, there had to be a fight and a heavy one that is and there was no sign of that happening around there. Daryl could feel the short numbness spreading through his veins followed by his blood boiling to the point he could see red in front of his eyes.

Flashes from what happened back on the highway crawled into his mind, Shane tackling her with ease, punching her so hard that her cheek split open. Sure, she was trained and ruthless when it came to combat, but Shane was way bigger. More brute force. And the motherfucker only had to catch her off guard. 

‘Give me yer flashlight.’ _Fuck_. The fact that it was getting darker pissed him the fuck off. Daryl felt his anger slowly turn to panic and the concerned feeling in his chest dropped to his stomach into a heavy knot. He had to find her. He had to.

‘Daryl.’ Glenn followed the man carefully, watching him examining the ground closely. ‘I don’t think Kat did it. But if he looked like that..’ 

Daryl stopped, making the boy bump into his back in the process. He was about to go off on him for voicing that aloud, the same damn thought that crossed his mind earlier and it made his blood boil when the light in his hand dropped on a set of fresh tracks.

‘There's two sets of tracks right here. Shane must've followed him a lot longer than he said.’ Daryl sunk his teeth in the bruised flesh of the inside of his lip, following the trails when he laid his eyes on a third set of footprints, his heartbeat moving suddenly in his eardrums.

‘There's fresh blood on this tree.’ Glenn froze in place, casting the light straight on the tree’s bark, eyes wide open, slowly frowning at the smudged blood as he got closer, before swallowing loudly. ‘Daryl. There’s grey hair stuck in it too.’

He shared a short look with Glenn, concern and mild panic settling in his chest again, thing that he dreaded so damn much. His mouth suddenly went dry, glancing one last time at the grey hair stuck on the tree before turning around to follow the trail deeper into the woods.

‘There's more tracks. Looks like they were walking in tandem, before-’ Daryl followed the trail, eyes darkening as soon as they laid on the third set of footprints overlapping with the others. ‘Yeah, there was a little dust up right here.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I mean something went down. It's gettin’ weird. Blood splattered all ‘round.’ Squinting blue eyes roaming on the ground obsessively, while his heart started pounding so hard that it was damn deafening him. 

Daryl took a few more steps following the trail, before crouching next to a pile of leaves and dirt that looked way too fresh. He bent down and reached out, faltering for a second before brushing it away, only to reveal a thin black strap peaking out. Daryl let out a frustrated growl, grabbing the strap.

‘Son of a bitch.’ He felt his face burning up and freezing up at the same time as he got back up to his feet, pulling out the M16 from the dirt. Daryl pointed the flashlight at the rifle, scowling at them bloody fingerprints and trails all over the grip, as if it was yanked away from _her_ hands, before turning to face Glenn.

But before he was able to voice out any of them murderous thoughts directed at Shane, his ears picked on the sound of rustled leaves somewhere behind them. Daryl gestured to Glenn to hide behind a tree as he did the same, leaping sideways and turning the flashlight off, throwing it back to the boy. He secured the black strap on his shoulder, letting the bloodied rifle fall to his side with more weight than is actually had, steady arms getting his crossbow in place.

Peaking from behind the tree, his face darkened as soon as he laid his eyes on the limping figure. Walker. A small sense of relief washed over him, noticing the figure was obviously a man. Fuck no. Why would he assume _she_ got bit. He sunk his teeth in the inside of his lower lip as the frustration started to settle in every fiber of his body again, signaling to Glenn to draw the walker in their direction.

Glenn did exactly as he was told, whistling and drawing the walker’s attention in their direction, the limping dead body stumbling between the two of them as Daryl’s arms tensed around the crossbow, ready to put that motherfucker down for good.

Just as he shot the arrow straight in its skull, the walker’s head jerked unnaturally to his right and in front of him in the split of a second, making Daryl frown at the odd movement. The corpse dropped flat to the ground, both an arrow and a black bladed hunting knife coming out of its skull, one stuck in the walker’s temple, one sheathed in the back of its head. 

Daryl threw a warning look in Glenn’s direction, before shifting to the side, crossbow locked and loaded and aimed at the shadowy figure limping in their direction. He felt his arms going numb as tired green eyes locked with his.

‘Kat?’

‘Morning, sunshine.’ Kat dragged her feet in their direction, a shit eating grin that didn’t match the look in her eyes plastered on her face, slowly leaning forward to take out her hunting knife from the walker’s skull.

‘Fuck’s that supposed to mean?’ Daryl couldn’t keep the anger off his tone, even if it wasn’t directed at her, letting the crossbow fall in its place on his back while he closed the distance between them, strong arms slipping under hers from the side, to keep her steady on her feet.

‘Not a clue. Seemed appropriate.’ Kat tilted her head to each side a few times, checking if she was about to get dizzier than she already was. ‘Think I got myself a nasty concussion.’

‘Are you okay?’ Glenn pushed behind the tree he was hiding, concerned eyes roaming all over her bloody frame. 

‘Do I look okay?’ Kat let out a breathy chuckle, thin eyebrows shooting up sarcastically at Glenn. ‘Think a couple of broken ribs. Hit my head a couple of times. Oh, and a graze on my thigh. Fun day. I’d do it again.’

‘Knock it off, ya dimwit.’ Daryl frowned at the top of her head, before leaning in to get on the same eye level with her, placing his hand under her chin to lift her head up. His upper lip curled in annoyance as he eyed the fresh bruises that spread around her neck. Shane tried to strangle her. ‘What happened?’

‘What happened?’ Kat jerked her head away to the side at the question, scowling as anger washed over her. ‘Mhm, let’s see.’ 

Daryl stared down at her, really taking in the fact that she was there, and he actually had his arms around that very much alive frail looking body. A deadpanned look crawled on his face, as she frowned in feigned confusion, wondering if it was possible that them blows she took to that pretty head turned her sassier. 

‘Shane fucking happened.’ Kat dropped the act, visibly irritated. ‘Caught him pushing Randall into the woods and I followed them. Thought for a second he’d set him free, I let my guard down. But Shane broke his neck right in front of me. Then he tried to kill me too. I got away after stabbing the bastard. I think I passed out in the woods at some point, then tried to find my way back and here I am. Where the fuck’s that stupid ass son of a bitch anyway?’

After a few seconds with no answer, Kat tilted her head to face Daryl, only to see a concerned look shared between him and Glenn. Her voice dropped at the same time as her heart in her chest did, turning it to a whisper. ‘What did _he_ say it happened here?’

‘He said you were the one that helped Randall escape and wanted to run off with him. And that you tried to kill him when he ran into you.’ 

Glenn was the one who answered, but her eyes shot up to Daryl’s face and he could see the faint gleams of insecurity in them tired, swollen green eyes. He leaned in, pressing his lips on her forehead, trying to wipe away them obvious thoughts that went through that head of hers. ‘Knew the fucker was lyin’.’

Kat felt the words brush against her forehead in a husky whisper and let out a relieved sigh, breath that she didn’t know she was holding onto. Daryl was there. And he never doubted her. Kat let her head fall on his shoulder, slightly pulling away before pushing herself on the tip of her boots, closing the distance between them. She pressed her lips against his in a small assuring kiss, feeling him leaning in slowly, as if not to break her more than she already was. 

‘Uh, guys. Sorry to interrupt, but-’

Pulling away, she saw Glenn rubbing the back of his neck, pacing around uncomfortably in front of them.

‘You said Shane snapped his neck.’ Glenn pointed at the limp body on the ground, a few feet away from them. ‘How’s he a walker then?’

‘He died.’ Kat frowned in confusion, her eyes darting between Glenn and walker Randall. ‘What do you mean?’

‘Without bein’ bit?’ This time the confusion laced tone came from Daryl, making her frown at him too.

She took a few steps towards the body, leaning in to emphasize her point by pulling at the dead man’s shirt in order to reveal his back, leaving Daryl behind. ‘Without being bit. He died. He turned. What’s puzzling your brains?’

Daryl closed the distance between them, crouching next to the body, furrowing at the lack of wounds on its back and arms. He pushed the corpse on its back, checking the body all over for walker bites. ‘No bite.’ 

‘No idea how it works, but if you die? You come back as one of those.’ Kat leaned against one of the trees to steady herself, watching the two men staring at her with their mouth hung open.


	16. Dimwit

‘Oh my God, honey!’ 

Carol was the first one to leap in their direction, seconds after Kat and Daryl stumbled through the front door. Kat watched the woman being stopped dead in her tracks, with her arms hanging in the air already reaching out to her. 

Green eyes scurried around the room, acknowledging the confused feeling that lingered heavily in the air. Shane had told them she was the one to set Randall free. It was only natural for them to feel betrayed. Her lips pressed into a thin line as she closed the distance between her and Carol, wrapping her arms around the woman’s shoulders.

‘It wasn’t me.’ Kat tried to make it come out naturally, but she was more focused on searching the room with her eyes rather than explaining herself. ‘You know that, right?’ She pulled away, watching the Carol’s eyes fall on her neck, taking in the fresh bruises that served as a grim reminder that she almost got strangled to death.

‘Oh God.’ Carol took a step back, taking her arms away from Kat’s back, wide eyed at the blood on her hands.

Kat felt someone tugging at the hem of her shirt, pulling the slightly torn fabric up to her shoulder blades while she clutched the shirt to her chest to keep her front covered. She shot a glare behind her, ready to scowl at the person that almost got her naked in front of everybody, but as soon as she felt something being pulled out of her back, she flinched away.

‘Rick and Shane ain't back?’ Daryl had pulled her shirt up to check her back, remembering the blood and grey hair stuck on the tree. He scowled at the sudden reminder of what happened there, small spikes of anger moving through his veins sending his heart racing again. A sense of relief washed it away, watching them fine, superficial cuts and bruised skin on Kat’s back as he picked a splinter. 

Daryl watched her small frame flinch away, the farm girl quickly moving her to the couch, bending Kat over the backrest, but still on her feet. Them inappropriate thoughts tried to crawl in his mind for a second, before he heard her muffling a gasp and saw that freckled face contort in pain. Hershel tended to the bullet graze on her thigh and Maggie didn’t waste any more time and started pulling out the splinters from her back. 

‘No. We heard a shot. Maybe they found Randall.’ 

‘We found him before we bumped into Kat. He’s a walker.’ 

‘Did you find the walker that bit him?’

‘No, the weird thing is he wasn't bit. His neck was broke. Shane and Randall's tracks were right on top of each other. And Shane ain't no tracker, so he didn't come up behind him. They were together.’ Daryl bit the inside of his bottom lip, shooting an assuring look at woman bent over the couch. 

Kat nodded, flinching at the same time at the needle that kept pushing through her skin, Hershel still working on her thigh, stitching it up.

‘Daryl’s right, they were walking together. I tracked them for a while.’ Kat paused, letting out a low growl at the way Maggie pulled out the splinters, sending jolts of pain through her spine in the process. ‘Thought he’d free him. Then he snapped his neck. Shane murdered him.’ She raised her head, locking eyes with Daryl. ‘Then he tried to kill me too. And god fucking damn it, people, I didn’t even consider the possibility that you didn’t knew. If you die, you turn! It doesn’t have to be a walker bite.’

‘What are you saying?’

‘Did I stutter or what?’ Kat’s voice came out as a sharp scream and she instantly regretted trying to speak at the same time as Hershel pulled at the wound one final time, finishing the stitches. 

‘Would you please get back out there, find Rick and Shane and find out what on earth is going on?’ Lori had shot a dismissive look at her, like what she just said was debatable until Rick and Shane would approve of it. 

Kat was good at concealing her reactions, it came with her former job, but she couldn’t believe her ears and she could feel her nostrils flaring, mouth agape at Lori, ready to give the woman a piece of her mind, but was cut off by the way Daryl shook his head in her direction. 

‘Wow, fuck me, sure.’ Kat scoffed as Patricia had pushed her into a sitting position, checking her swollen jaw and she could feel the disinfectant burning into her skin as the woman poured it on her cheek, but Kat’s eyes went straight to Daryl and Lori, as soon as he accepted her request, sinking her teeth in the bruised flesh of her lip. If Shane was out there, she knew Daryl would go off on him and even if that’s what she wanted to do herself, she couldn’t let him fight her battles. 

‘I’m coming too.’ 

‘Nah, ya ain’t. Let them people patch ya up, ya dimwit.’ Daryl was probably trying to make her understand the condition she was in, but his concerned tone did not match the nickname, making her scoff at the fact that he was actually scolding her as if she was a kid.

‘Charming.’ Kat rolled her eyes, flinching at the gentle fingers tugging on the old stitches on her cheek.

‘Honey, these have to stay longer now. The wound you had, the one that was healing, it was almost split open again. You’re bleeding.’

Kat let out a sigh, eyeing the blood smudged on the cloth Patricia held in front of her. She gave a short nod, accepting the fact that her entire body will probably be covered in stitches at this rate, before turning her head towards Daryl again. 

‘Be safe.’

She saw the short nod thrown her way, but the look on Daryl’s face was not assuring at all. If he’ll bump into Shane, he’ll kill the son of a bitch. But as soon as she heard the door being opened, the fuss coming from the porch made her push Patricia’s hands away, leaping straight for the door.

Kat pushed through the crowd blocking the door, bumping into Daryl’s back before taking a step back and try to see what the commotion was about. A deep scowl tugged at her features, watching the herd cross the field in front of the house, coming straight for them.

‘Well, fuck.’ Kat tugged at the rifle on Daryl’s back, making squinting blue eyes snap at her. ‘What? Don’t give me that look. We all know a herd that size would rip this house down.’ Kat frowned at the way he kept silent, wondering what the hell was he thinking before she felt him giving in, the rifle’s weight pulling on the strap in her hand.

‘Kill as many as we can, and we'll use the cars to lead the rest of them off the farm.’ 

Kat turned on her heels, ready to leave, rifle already held in place, but a strong hold pulled at her arm, sending her spinning in place until she was face to face with him. 

‘None of them reckless things, okay? Ya shoot ‘em down, get yer bike, drive ‘em away.’ Darkened blue eyes squinted down at her, while the grip on her arm didn’t loosen up until that pretty head of hers nodded a few seconds later.

‘You too.’ Kat’s fingers dug in his fabric of his dark shirt, pulling him in for a quick peck on the lips, before turning around once again, leaping over the steps. As the gunshots echoed behind her she started running through the bodies that dropped dead to the ground around her, heading straight for her bike.

Aiming at one walker that bumped repeatedly into her bike, trying to get to her, Kat pulled the trigger, watching the top of its head blown away to pieces before falling limp over the bike. She was only a few feet away, running towards it when another two walkers appeared out of thin air, making her scowl as she let the rifle fall on her back. Pulling her knives out, Kat charged at the closest walker, pushing the blade through its temple, before using the falling body by stepping on its shoulder to launch herself at the second walker in front of her. Both her arms reached in front of her, pushing the knives through the sides of the roamer’s head, catching it before it fell on her. 

Pushing the dead weight off her, Kat froze in place at a sudden cold whiff going right past her ear, golden eyes widened, blinking at the thin broken hairs falling over her shoulder like it was some kind of weird slow motion. A loud thud made her snap back to reality, watching another limp body fall to the ground next to her, an arrow sticking out of its skull. Kat turned her head to the side, catching a glimpse of a crossbow moving its aim away from her. 

A group of walkers were already heading her way again and not wasting another second, taking advantage of the opening Daryl created for her, Kat pulled the arrow out of the walker’s head, sliding it under the straps on her thigh, before straddling her bike and with a pane-shattering roar, she shot away from the rotten arms reaching out for her.

The gunshots filled the air around with no signs of stopping and a terrible feeling crawled under her skin as she circled around a group of walkers, shouting and shooting at them at the same time, trying to draw them away from there. 

‘Fuck, this is useless.’

Kat clicked her tongue, frustration seeping through, as she drove away but the small group she herded in one place limped in the same direction as before, with only a couple of strays following her. She was about to try again, cutting in front of the walkers, flinching at the pain filled screams and howls that echoed through the air, as she tried not to think about who it belonged to. 

A sudden light erupted somewhere behind her, making Kat wince at the unexpected shadow casted in front of her and actually taking in the tremendous number of walkers she was trying to pull away from the farm, now limping agitated towards her. Before she could have gotten overrun, Kat charged ahead slaloming through the herd that kept coming her way, with the rifle’s barrel glued to the windscreen, shooting down whatever walker she had to in order to get away.

As soon as she found herself on the road, away from the farm, Kat lingered for more minutes than she should have, watching the barn burning and collapsing, the flames attracting the damn creatures to it and away from the road. Kat pushed a hand through the top of her hair, pulling away the strands that covered her face, exhaling deeply.

She thought briefly at the supply bag in Daryl’s tent. She had lost one bag full of ammo and as much as she needed it, even if it was spared by the fire that spread through the field, there was no way in hell she’d come out alive from there. She sighed heavily, shaking her head at her own thoughts. Because it was way easier to think about that damn bag, rather than thinking about the screams she heard earlier and acknowledge the fact that the group didn’t manage to get away unscathed.

But if they did, she knew where they’d be. The highway. No. They did get away, they had to. Trying to swallow through the tightening that set in her throat, Kat didn’t want to acknowledge the silent sobs that crawled out, slowly riding down the road.

By the time she managed to reach the highway, the sunrise lit up the sky, setting a more optimistic tone as now she could see any threat coming her way. Or any sign of their group on the road. Kat drove slowly, slaloming through the abandoned cars, feeling the exhaustion catching up with her, hitting her body like a truck. She let out a bitter chuckle, it had been a long ass day. Lifting her gaze from the road, green eyes opened wide at the sight in front of her. Desperate fingers clawed at the controls, trying to stop the engine, without sparing even a short glance in their direction. Kat felt a newfound strength inside her, yanking herself off the bike and sprinting down the highway until she crashed against his chest, strong arms wrapping around her tightly in the blink of an eye, feeling him lean in and kiss the top of her head, a gentle whisper breathed into her hair, and as much as she hated that word, it made her chuckle.

‘Ya dimwit.’


	17. Better be silent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Second attempt at)Smut filled chapter, sorry not sorry!

They have been moving from house to house every few days now, sometimes they had to leave as soon as they thought they found a seemingly safe place. Walkers would appear out of nowhere and force them to leave, exhausted, hungry and scared. Luckily the last house they had moved in to, seemed more than safe for now, small place but it had two stories, an almost untouched pantry and all the windows already sealed, leaving only two ways for access, front door and back door. All in all, it had been more than enough for their group to be able to rest. Rick had appointed shifts for keeping watch on both doors, and he included only the people who were able to fight. 

Kat had taken over her shift a while ago, guarding the back door, tired eyes blinking at the burning cigarette as her mind drifted off to what happened that night back at the farm and what happened after. Their group was smaller now, Hershel had lost Patricia and Jimmy and Kat would sometimes wake up, still hearing the screams that echoed around her that night. A pang of guilt in her chest made her sigh. She was afraid to voice it out, but she was more than happy that it wasn’t someone from their original group. However, Andrea was missing too. The blonde had gone missing and they didn’t even try to find her. 

That would be another thing, as Rick enforced it when he finally put himself in charge of the group. Apparently, he killed Shane that night and Kat could feel nothing about it, absolutely nothing. No pity, no anger. Shane got exactly what he deserved, if anything, Kat was a bit bummed about the fact that she wasn’t the one to put a bullet through his head. Alas, Rick had changed since that night and Kat couldn’t decide if it was good or not. He kept them all alive and Kat couldn’t complain about it, whatever his ways were. She had accepted him as her superior, a man worthy for her to follow, even if sometimes she silently questioned his ways.

Kat let out a chuckle, the situation reminded her of the time she had served in the Russian army. Good thing she was already used to it. She took one last drag, stepping on the burning end of the cigarette, before placing it back in the too empty for her liking pack. 

She heard movement in the house, pushing herself back on her feet from where she leaned against the wall on the floor, wincing at the pain spreading through her upper body. Shane did her good that day back in the woods. Hershel checked it out as soon as they settled in a safe place, and she was thrilled to find out about the one or two broken ribs, nothing to put her in immediate danger, but it still hurt like a bitch. 

As soon as she was about to check on whoever roamed around the house that late at night, she found herself being pushed against the wall, gasping as her still bruised back hit the damn thing. Calloused hands found their way under the hem of her shirt, heated palms sliding up and down her waist, leaving burning trails behind them, before his fingers dug in the soft skin. Kat threw her arms around his neck while he leaned in, not wasting another second and met him halfway, pressing her lips against his in an open-mouthed desperate kiss that made her mind go blank. Biting down on his lower lip softly, Kat pulled away, a smug smile on her face at the sigh he let out, before cocking her head to the side, watching them blue eyes staring down at her with a hunger that made her insides tingle.

‘You know, it could have been anyone else keeping watch here tonight.’ Kat grinned at him, dragging her fingernails across the sensitive skin on the back of his head. ‘As a matter of fact, I took over Glenn’s shift. This is how you greet everyone nowadays?’ A thin eyebrow shot up in a teasing way, watching him roll his eyes. ‘I’m kinda jealous, to be honest.’

‘Ya done?’ Daryl looked down at her, all the while his hands dropped on them curvy hips, thumbs absently but surely caressing their way down the soft skin and under the waistband of her short jeans. A smirk tugged at the corner of his lips, watching them green eyes go wide at his ministration, soon enough getting all glazed over with lust.

‘Here?’ Kat felt her breath hitch, as he leaned in closing the distance between them, nuzzling the soft skin under her ear with his lips while one hand worked lazily on the button of her shorts.

‘Mhm..’ 

‘There are people sleeping behind this wall.’ Her tone turned to a whisper, trying to catch her breath but her heart raced at the quick fingers that pulled down the zipper, slowly tracing the fabric of her panties upwards, before diving under.

Kat’s eyes closed shut, pressing the back of her head against the wall as nimbly fingers found the wetness already pooling between her legs, slowly sliding between her folds back and forth, slicking themselves up. She felt herself buckle into his touch, her body greedily asking for more as he pushed a knee between her shaky legs, forcing them apart. 

‘Then ya’d better be silent.’ He pressed his lips to her ear, whispering the words on that damn hot raspy tone of his and Kat could feel him smile as he slid one finger inside her in a swift motion, making her gasp at the sudden intrusion.

‘Fuck, so warm..’ Daryl groaned, burying his head into her neck, pushing the loose shirt away from her shoulder and leaving open mouthed kisses down her exposed collarbone as he pushed another finger inside her. He heard her muffle a cry, while her body tensed and twitched, curvy hips slightly rolling, fucking herself on his fingers. ‘More?’

Her back arched, moving her hips as he continued working his fingers inside her and she could only nod, no longer able to stay coherent, not with his fingers sliding inside her, two of them at the same time. Kat let her arm fall from around his neck, sliding between them, cupping his growing erection through his pants, drawing another grown out of him, as her fingers pressed and groped hungrily, before fumbling with his belt.

Daryl pulled out his fingers slowly, the slick sound making him growl as he bit down on the nape of her neck. He pulled away just enough so he’d be able to look down at them lustful eyes, as he brought the two dripping wet fingers to her parted lips. His other hand shot up from her waist, calloused fingers gently digging on the sides of her jaw, silently ordering her to open her mouth for him. 

Kat felt her head in a daze, absolutely hypnotized by the man towering over her, ready to please him in every and each way she was able to, that was Daryl’s effect on her, especially since they’ve been on the move so often lately, all the exhaustion, all the stress and fear pilling up on each one of them and it was moments like this that made them feel alive and gave them the comfort they both needed so badly.

She let her mouth hang open, green eyes locked with his blue ones darkened by desire, as her tongue pushed past her lips and swirled around the two wet fingers, tasting herself, tasting the way Daryl made her feel. Kat heard him let out a low moan as his eyes watched the way her tongue twisted and twirled around his fingers, before he pushed them inside her mouth, silently ordering her to suck on them.

His breath hitched as he closed his eyes, feeling the way her tongue curled around his fingers as he applied pressure on it, only that damn hot mouth of hers could have been enough to send him over the edge right there, but he pulled out his fingers from her mouth with a small pop while tugging at his own belt. He tried to keep his touch gentle as he turned her around, silently commanding Kat to flatten herself against the wall. She did so with a whimper, her hands pressed on the hard surface, bracing herself.

Daryl let his pants fall to his knees carelessly, quick hands pushing the black boxers off at the same time he tugged at her shorts, yanking them down and silently groaning at the way Kat pushed her bare ass against his erection, slender bruised legs already shaking in anticipation. He clasped her hips in a chain-like grip with one hand, while the other found its way up, softly squeezing her neck before covering her parted lips. He could feel her breaths coming in deep and fast and without warning he pushed himself inside her, fast strong and hard in an absolutely possessive move.

Her eyelids drifted closed once again and her fingers clawed absently at the cold surface, as each thrust caused her breasts to jiggle and squish against the wall. She felt him press closer, her back against his chest as his mouth found the nape of her neck, teeth sinking in at the same time he snapped his hips against hers, drawing a muffled moan out of her. 

His tongue lapped at the bruised skin at he pounded relentlessly into her, taunting shushing noises whispered into her ear as he picked up the pace, feeling her walls squeezing him into the sweetest grip he could ever want his cock buried into. ‘So fuckin’ good. Ya’re so fuckin’ good, Kat.’ Daryl heard her whimper, feeling her legs giving in as he tightened the grip on her hip, pulling her to meet his thrusts. ‘Come for me, babe.’

Kat felt her mind go blank, felt her bruised body come apart as her orgasm clawed at her from the inside, struggling to breathe as her body convulsed. Faintly she heard a groan and she knew that her climax had pushed him over the edge as well. She felt him release inside her, felt him thrust hard, grinding his hips against hers. The spasms went on and on as he clung to her, crushing her small body between him and the wall with each slow, deep thrust, overpowered by sensation, riding out their orgasms. 

Daryl licked the bruised skin on her neck as they both came down from their high. He unclasped his hand from her mouth, hearing her sighing deeply as he pulled out of her and he felt the same disappointment as she did, because being inside her felt like heaven. He pulled away, leaning to tug at the shorts around her ankles, calloused hands caressing the goosebumps on her shaky thighs, before he spanked her ass, drawing a breathy, exhausted chuckle out of her.

‘Thanks.’ Kat turned around, pulling her shorts around her hips, still twitching once in a while, the sweet sensation inside her body threatening to linger more than usual, and she wasn’t going to be mad at that for sure.

She leaned against the wall, not fully trusting her own two feet yet, watching him dress back up slowly, taking his sweet time on that damn belt. A small smirk spread on her face, shaking her head. This man had her wrapped around his little finger and god be damned if she knew what triggered it, but she loved every minute of it.

Daryl finished fumbling with the damn belt, arms lazily reaching out for Kat’s small frame, as he wrapped them around her shoulders before falling loosely around her waist, pressing their foreheads together. ‘Done bein’ all jealous?’

Kat rolled her eyes, throwing her arms around his waist, pulling him closer to her. She bit down on her lower lip, green eyes blinking up at him innocently. ‘Only if I’m the only one you greet that way.’ 

He leaned in, placing his lips against them soft, swollen lips he could hardly stay away from. ‘Only ya. And Asian boy sometimes. Came for him today, bumped into ya.’ Daryl tightened his grip around her small waist as she tried to wriggle away in fake disappointment. 

‘Asshole.’ She felt him crush her against his chest as she kept trying to get away, giggling silently like a damn schoolgirl and hoping that they didn’t wake anybody up.


	18. The Cabin, part 1

A shaky breath left her trembling lips, watching the small foggy cloud fading away slowly, feeling her lungs shrink inside her chest. And it wasn’t really about the unbearable cold outside, but in that moment, she was pretty damn sure this was nature’s way of making fun of her for being addicted to smoking. No cigarettes for the past few days, barely any sleep, almost no food, absolutely no safe place. 

Rick had dragged them through the snow for hours now, away from any type of settlement, considering the fact that they almost got overrun by a rather big herd in the middle of the night. If anything had went their way somehow, it was the fact that while rummaging through the second to last house they had been in, Carol had found a couple of boxes marked ‘winter clothes’ in the basement. The oversized parka Kat had managed to get her hands onto was better than nothing, but after being that many hours outside, the cold managed to crawl under her skin and claw at her bones painfully and as much as she tried to, she couldn’t stop her body from trembling uncontrollably. 

Kat looked over her shoulder, noticing the exhaustion on Lori’s face as the woman dragged her feet forcefully through the snow. Being pregnant during the apocalypse has not been the smartest idea but they all tried to offer Lori as much support as possible, sometimes skipping meals so she could eat more, and Kat felt somehow cruelly spared by that fate if anything. She sighed, moving her eyes in front of her, frowning at the snow that started falling again. 

Ignoring the low growls coming from the woods, green eyes shot up to the sky only to be met by heavy grey clouds that looked more threatening than the couple of almost frozen walkers that tried to limp towards them from the side. Groaning, Kat tugged at the sweater around her neck that she was using as a scarf while she tried to wriggle her frozen fingers back into following what her brain wanted them to do, slowly clutching the hilt of her knife. She dragged her feet to her right, straying away from the group and successfully ignoring the whisper yells directed at her before tightly pursing her purple lips. She let out loud kissy noises that the walkers didn’t fail to hear, limping agitated in her way like a couple of stray dead puppies.

‘ _Иди сюда, щенки._ ’ 

Kat took another step towards them, failing to notice the way her boots sunk in the snow, before she pushed the knife through the first walker’s skull, wincing at the loud cracking noise it made when she pulled the blade out. She pushed the dead body to the side, watching it fall to the ground while she moved her attention to the second walker. Her eyes widened in disbelief as her body seemed frozen for a second, trying to move her legs but failing, briefly looking at her feet. She let out a frustrated groan, trying to wriggle her legs out of the snow that went past her knees, watching the second walker closing in faster than she wanted to. 

Before she was able to think her next move, the walker stumbled over the dead body between them, crashing down on Kat in the process, falling onto her back with the walker on top of her. Rotten lips curled and exposed the snapping set of teeth inches away from her arm as she tried to push the blade through its eye socket. Just as she felt the walker snapping its jaw shut into the thick layer of her parka, its head jerked to the side before the corpse went limp on top of her.

Kat rolled her eyes as she stopped trying to wriggle away from under the awfully heavy frozen corpse, pulling out the arrow from its head while listening to the cracking sound of footsteps pushing through the piles of snow.

Pushing the dead body away, strong hands grabbed gently at her forearms, bringing her back on her feet in the blink of an eye. She dusted herself off, watching the snow fall from her damp jacket, scowling at the fresh blood splattered on its front. 

‘Ya okay?’ Daryl kicked at the snow around her legs, trying to help her get free as she reached out and jabbed the bloodied arrow in his direction.

‘Yeah. Thanks.’ Kat stopped briefly, frowning at the dead walkers as the layer of snow grew thicker on their bodies, covering their clothes. 

‘Ya should’ve let ‘em be. Frozen fucks can’t do much.’ Daryl grabbed her forearm again, helping her out of the snow and back on their tracks.

‘They were getting too close.’ Kat shrugged, pulling at the straps around her shoulders, trying to glue the backpack to her back for more friction, seeking something, anything to get her warmer as she walked towards the group waiting for Daryl and her. ‘The weather’s about to go from bad to worse, though.’

‘Snowstorm’s coming our way.’ Rick clicked his tongue, scowling at the sky.

Every single face she laid her eyes on was looking sick, frozen and exhausted and, hell, she knew that if she was half freezing, these people were close to getting some nasty ass frostbites if they wandered around like that in the snow anymore.

‘Rick, we need shelter. These dudes are in full fishing gear. There must be a lake around.’ Kat turned around to shoot one last look towards the bodies, sheltering her eyes from the snow that started to fall heavier. ‘Maybe a cabin too?’

Rick shot a glare at the faces that lit up around him, trying to smother the small amount of hope that started to glimmer in their tired eyes, fearing that it’ll be a dead end. ‘Or maybe it’s nothing. It’s a long shot.’ 

‘Well it sounds better than going nowhere and freezing to death, doesn’t it?’ Kat looked up to face Rick, green eyes never faltering one second, even if her body shivered so bad that she felt all her joints popping and cracking. She took a step closer, lowering her tone until it was almost a whisper. ‘Lori, Carl they can’t keep this much longer. I can’t. No one else can’t, as much as we’d want to.’

Kat watched him pace around for a while, realizing that they couldn’t continue walking through a snowstorm, and that what they were doing was basically aimless walking. The weather was bad and with each passing minute, it was getting worse and worse. 

She let out a shaky sigh as soon as Rick nodded, throwing her arms in the air like she had just won the apocalyptic lottery, slowly basking in the content feeling caused by having an actual plan. 

‘You two lead the way. If there’s anything out there, you and Daryl will find us the shortest way.’

Kat nodded, sharing a short look with Daryl, before her frozen fingers trembled on the magazine of the rifle, pushing it back until the metallic click was heard, getting ready for whatever was about to come their way. 

‘Keep your bullets. No real reason to waste ammo on a couple of frozen walkers.’

‘It’s not walkers I’m preparing for. If there is a cabin out there, maybe others have found it already.’ Kat turned her head, glaring at Rick as they slowly moved through the snow, deeper in the woods. ‘Maybe they won’t be happy having company. Rick?’

Rick sucked his teeth without facing her, fully aware of what she was implying. He knew what they would be forced to do in that case and as much as he would be against it in any other circumstances, he had to keep the group safe. At any cost.

‘I know.’

Kat bit down on her lower lip, frowning at the lack of any feeling spreading through it, focusing on her steps through the snow. The silence settled in once again, only the wind echoing through the trees around them as they slowly dragged their feet through the thick layer of snow. Kat looked down at her rifle, cursing silently the lack of winter gloves, as the fingerless ones she was sporting on did not offer her much warmth. The tips of her fingers were burning, changing color to a bright pink. She let out a frustrated groan, fully aware of the frostbite that was flourishing slowly into her flesh.

She tuned out the hopeless small voices that started whispering behind them, trembling arms bringing the rifle under her chin, wincing at the cold metal touching her cheek. Pushing down the sweater around her neck, Kat adjusted the rifle’s position so she’d be able to look through the scope.

‘ _Ребята._ ’

Daryl squinted in the same direction, not entirely sure of what she had her eyes on, sheltering his eyes from the falling snow. He grabbed the rifle she shoved in his direction, raising one arm signaling the group to stop. As soon as he peeked through the scope, a wooden roof became visible through the trees. He threw the rifle over Kat’s small frame, landing in Rick’s hands.

‘Girl was right.’ Daryl looked down at her, ignoring the way she stuck out her tongue like she was a damn kid, all smug at the fact that she had been right. ‘There’s a cabin maybe ten minutes on foot from here.’

Kat took the rifle back from Rick, turning around to face him, as he laid out the plan. The whole group would have to close the ten minutes distance, but while the three of them will search the cabin, the others will have to wait and stay hidden behind the first line of trees, ready to gun down anything or anyone that looked threatening enough if the situation required it.

She looked at the rest of the group as the conflicted feelings started seeping through. Not everyone agreed with it but they really had no other choice. If there were people there, everything could go only in two ways. They would either have to let them in or their group would have to fight their way in. But the internal turmoil vanished into thin air as soon as they got close to the edge of the woods.

Kat led the way, stopping abruptly in front of a tree at the edge of the woods. The cold outside must have sunk deep into her flesh, because she couldn’t frown or have any other reaction at what laid in front of her. She raised an arm in the air, not turning away.

‘Stop.’

She felt Daryl pushing past her, looking down at the frail form growling weakly at them. The boy had been tied up against the tree, barbwire sinking into its skinny small body, with no walker bite or any other wound except for the ones caused by him probably trying to free himself from the barbwire when he was still alive. Kat felt sick to her stomach, taking a step back, the cruel realization dawning upon her. She met Daryl’s gaze briefly, both of them sporting a similar scowl as Rick joined them.

‘If you had any doubts, well this right here should be enough proof.’ Kat gazed through the trees at the wooden cabin, bringing the rifle up and peeking through the scope, noticing the flickering light coming from one of its windows on the second floor.

Daryl crouched next to the small walker, blue eyes roaming over its body, searching for any other clue. ‘Boy was left outside to die.’

Another growl drew their attention to a few trees to their left, long hair moving chaotically from the other side, tangled by the wind and snow dampening it as the layer grew thicker. Kat moved her feet in its direction, being met by the fragile and frozen body of a turned woman, yanking itself in her direction as the barbwire torn her skin through the ragged shirt. Kat let go of her rifle, grabbing her knife, slowly kneeling in front of the agitated walker, before pushing the blade through its temple, its head falling limp in front of her.

The little boy’s groans stopped a few seconds after, as she got back up to her feet, watching Rick pull out his hunting knife from its head. 

‘Whoever’s in that cabin-’ Kat walked back to the group, splattering the blood off her knife onto the snow. ‘-they’re responsible for this. These right there?’ She pointed the blade at the wooden cabin. ‘-ain’t good people.’


	19. The Cabin, part 2

Even if they wanted to be seen, it would have been impossible for someone to notice them through the snowstorm that started before they even stepped out of the woods towards the cabin. Kat had covered the lower side of her face with the sweater, trying to catch her breath, but the chilly wind coming through all the layers, hit her so hard that she caught herself suffocating, gasping for air. Turning her back to the cabin, she managed to steady her breath as she walked backwards. She caught a glimpse of dark clothing a few feet away from her, knowing that Daryl and Rick were following her closely.

The plan was more than simple and even if it was met with disapproving stares, it was their best shot. Knock on the front door, play the damsel in distress, get in, distract them from the back door, liquidate the targets.

Kat dragged herself in front of the door, her body pushed by the wind like she was a paper bag. She took a few steps towards the door, catching a glimpse of slight movement from the windows. She looked around her, but she was met with nothing, Daryl and Rick could have been two feet away from her and she wouldn’t have been able to see them. That scared her more than what was expecting her inside the house. 

_What if they won’t answer?_

A trembling hand knocked against the wooden door. Silence. A sharp burst of wind almost knocked her to the side, forcing her to grab onto the doorknob for dear life before slamming her fist into the closed door again. 

‘Help! Please help me!’

She winced at the pain spreading from her hand through her entire forearm, but continued to hit the damn door until small drops of blood splattered on it, smearing them as she unrelentingly slammed her balled up fist against it.

The door opened suddenly, making her stumble forwards, kneeling half inside and half outside, gasping for air like her lungs unexpectedly remembered how to breathe. Her eyes darted across the candle lit room, trying to figure out if there were more people inside. The couch to her right blocked her vision, and the figures in front of her reduced it even more. Kat raised her head, while pulling at the sweater draped around her mouth, noticing the two shadowy shapes that towered over her. Two men. 

One of them grabbed her arm forcefully, dragging her small frame on the floor into the cabin while the other slammed shut the front door, locking it in the split of a second.

_But they’ll search you. They’ll take away your weapons._

Kat watched the room spin around her as the man yanked her body from the side, slamming her back to the floor, while straddling her. She pushed her chin up, trying to put some distance between her exposed neck and the blade the man on top of her pushed it against her skin. 

‘Frank, search her.’

Kat tried to relax under the obvious threat, tried to stay still as much as she could, feeling who she deemed as Frank, patting her legs and going higher to her thighs, groping the inside of her left leg. She pushed her legs together involuntarily, watching the man on top of her shake his head disapprovingly. 

‘Baby doll, we just need to make sure you ain’t dangerous. Seems fair, doesn’t it?’

She watched the man on top of her shifting his weight lower, sitting on her thighs, making room for the other to search her upper body, while still pressing the blade against her neck. Just as he was about to unzip her parka, the man on top of her pushed Frank’s hands aside.

‘Frank, may I do the honors? It had been your turn last time.’

Kat tried her best not to scowl at the sleazy grin the man above her had plastered on his face as he grabbed the zipper of her jacket, pulling it down slowly. He pushed the oversized parka to the sides, uncovering the belts and straps hugging her hips, puckering up his lips and making a disapproving sound as he laid his eyes on her two hunting knives.

‘A woman like you shouldn’t play around with these pointy things. Do you even know your way with ‘em?’ The man took out both her hunting knives, inspecting the blades as he chuckled, before throwing them to the side.

‘No. Not really.’ Kat forced a smile, locking eyes with the man on top of her. ‘These times force you to do things you won’t normally do, isn’t it?’

_You’ll be defenseless._

The two men shared a laugh, making her skin crawl as she watched those two throwing funny glances at each other. 

‘I’m Joe. This is Frank.’ The man on top of her turned to look down at her, blade not moving away even an inch. ‘You alone, princess?’

Kat’s eyebrow shot up at the lack of curiosity regarding her identity, they weren’t trying to make friends. She nodded slightly, trying to keep her runny nose in check, as she felt a faint chilly breeze brushing against the top of her head, trying to keep away from the knife against her throat. ‘Only you two in this big ass house?’

The man on top of her, Joe, laughed again as he looked briefly at the wall to her right. Following his gaze, she was met with family photos, framed and nicely hanged on the wooden wall. A woman. A boy. Those were the walkers they had killed earlier. The ones tied up to the trees with barbwire. The ones left to die in the cold. The ones that seemed to have starved for a long time before that. Kat felt nauseated, a shiver going through her entire body, trembling under Joe as she tried to keep still.

‘You know, we let you in and you won’t freeze to death. Seems appropriate you have to offer us something. Luckily for me, you ain’t Frank’s type.’ Joe grinned again as he cocked his head to the side, silently ordering the other man to bend over. ‘Frank, hold this for me.’

Kat watched the other man grab the knife held against her neck, taking it away as Joe slid his hand on the front of her black shirt, groping her left breast through the fabric. She flinched, panic slowly spreading through her body as Joe let out a dark chuckle, his eyes glued to the shirt while he pushed both his hands under its hem.

‘Frank here prefers little boys, doesn’t he?’ 

Kat spat the words, while his hands slid under her shirt, groping her hips before he suddenly pulled them away only to be replaced by a sharp pain spreading through her ribs. Before she was able to let out any type of pain filled groan, a strong hand wrapped around her neck, silencing her while she felt the other fumbling with her belts. All she could see were the boy and the mother tied up to the trees, hand slamming against the wooden floor searching for her knives, anything to help her put those monsters down. She heard Joe’s laugh as he asked something she couldn’t understand before she felt the tip of a boot jabbed into her cheek and the sole of the other pressed firmly and painfully on the back of her hand.

She felt the cold spreading across the wooden floor she was held against, before the back door slammed open. Kat opened her eyes, suddenly aware of who was drawing their attention. The grasp around her neck faltered as she heard Frank running for the back door, releasing her hand in the process. She grabbed Joe’s arm, flinching at the pain spreading through her hand while twisting the man’s arm until a satisfying pop echoed between them before he started howling, pulling away. Kat wriggled away from the man as she heard Frank’s piercing scream die out, a silent gunshot putting an end to it. 

She pulled away from the howling man as he grabbed onto one of her knives, chaotically swinging it to the sides to keep her away. Kat wobbled on her numb feet, silently cursing Joe’s weight before grabbing his good arm and snapping his wrist with a sickening pop as the broken bone pierced his skin from the inside out, her knife falling to the floor.

_You’ll be forced to kill them._

‘You fuckin’ crazy bitch!’

Kat heard footsteps rushing in their direction before she swung her fist into Joe’s jaw, making his head snap to the side as the man cried out. She bent down to grab her knife, swinging the blade to her right close enough so she’d slit the kneeling man’s throat. As he suffocated and gurgled on the blood flowing down his open neck, Kat slid her frostbitten fingers into the cut, as the man’s eyes almost popped out of his skull in horror. She forcefully pushed her fingers around the twitching muscles, grabbing onto whatever she could before yanking forcefully, watching the man’s eyes roll at the back of his head in shock before his body went limp, hitting the front door with a loud thud. 

She let go, taking a couple of steps back, her head slightly leaning to the side as she tried to catch her breath, watching the dead man in front of her as if she had to admire her work, realization dawning upon her as soon as everything around her fell silent. Kat looked over her shoulder as her chest went up and down, still gasping for air, mouth agape, only to be met by a slowly lowered crossbow. 

‘First floor’s clear. No signs of others.’ Rick tilted his head, moving his eyes from Kat’s messy form to the kneeling body that was blocking the front door. 

‘Check the second floor. Probably empty, but it won’t hurt to do it.’ Kat pointed one of her bloodied fingers at the ceiling, still breathing heavily, wincing at the pain spreading through her torso. ‘I’ll just.. I’ll just sit here for a bit.’

Daryl watched her drop on the floor, leaning against the couch, green eyes gazing at the wall in front of her as the dead body rested in a growing pool of blood. He aimed his crossbow at its head before releasing the arrow, a sickening wet sound covering the silence as the dead man’s eye popped. He threw one more look at her before he started climbing the stairs behind Rick.

Kat held her right hand on her ribs, slowly massaging the place where Joe had hit her, tired eyes glued at the family photos in front of her, wondering through what hell those two monsters made that cute little boy and his mom go through.

She curled her upper lip in disgust feeling nauseated again, as she moved her gaze back to the dead man next to her, wishing she had made his death even more painful or gruesome. A shaky hand reached out to yank the arrow from its left eye socket, before hearing footsteps coming down the stairs.

‘It’s clear. I’ll go get the others.’ Rick walked to the front door, stopping in front of the dead body before looking down at Kat. ‘You good?’

Kat nodded, reaching a hand out to him while he did the same, letting him pull her back on her feet. She felt Rick’s fingers lightly brushing against her left cheek as he frowned at her jaw. She winced as soon as his fingertips applied pressure, pulling away involuntarily. 

‘I’m beginning to think you really like getting punched.’ Rick tried to lighten up the grim mood that set through the open living room they were standing in, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

‘I like it rough.’ Kat rolled her eyes, letting out a chuckle before locking eyes with Daryl, wriggling her thin brows suggestively and watching the concerned look on his face turn to a deadpanned one before turning back to Rick. 

‘Right.’ Rick raised his eyebrows, shaking his head amused. ‘Daryl, give me a hand here.’

Kat left the two of them to take care of the dead body blocking the front door, dragging her feet on the wooden floor until she let herself crash on the couch, feeling the way her frozen bones sunk into the soft cushions after such a long time that she almost forgot how it felt. Bloody fingers tugged at the straps and laces of her boots, taking them off and letting them fall to the floor with a loud thud. She hugged her knees to her chest, curling in a small ball in the corner of the couch, content at the warm feeling.

She heard the door open and close shut shortly after the body was thrown outside she thought, but she didn’t want to give much thought to that. They would burn the body probably. If it was her decision to make, she would have probably wanted to skin it alive but the monster was already dead. She felt the cushion shift at a new weight resting on top of it next to her, before a strong arm found its way around her shoulders, bringing her closer.

Kat let her head fall on his chest, closing her eyes as she wriggled her head until the tip of her nose brushed against the nape of his neck. She inhaled deeply the sweet, musky, earthy scent, one that became so familiar and incredibly comforting, a scent that she loved and it relaxed her more than anything else. It was like her own, personal aromatherapy. She let out a small chuckle, amused by her own thoughts, pulling away slightly. The hold around her shoulders tightened, squeezing her closer to him as he buried his nose into her hair.

‘Kat..’ Daryl absently brushed her tangled hair back in place. ‘It’s okay to let it out.’

‘Don’t know what you’re talking about.’ Kat opened her eyes, staring at the small coffee table placed in front of the couch. She knew what he wanted to say, but she didn’t feel that she had the luxury to break down, regardless of what had happened or whatever chaos her emotions were whirling into.

She felt his chest rising, inhaling as he was about to say something else, but it was cut short by the front door being slammed open, the wooden floor squeaking under the heavy rushed steps stumbling inside. Kat turned her head, watching their group tripping over their frozen feet as they made their way inside. Glenn slammed the door shut as soon as the last one of their group entered, pressing his back against it while sighing relieved, slowly sliding to the floor.

‘I think my toes will fall off.’ Glenn let out a loud chuckle, his hoarse voice breaking over and over, making him laugh even harder.

Kat turned her head around, suddenly remembering her frostbitten fingers and tuning out the cheerful laughter behind her. She raised her hands, slowly peeling off the black fingerless gloves, tired eyes darting over the pink skin covered in blood, rotating her wrist slowly. She frowned at the split skin on the side of her right hand, before letting out a shaky sigh. Dry calloused fingers grabbed her hand gently, turning it to the side.

‘Need Hershel to patch ya up.’ Daryl’s voice turned to a whisper, squinted eyes roaming over the cuts and bruises on her small hand.

Kat nodded, keeping her head low, not wanting to make eye contact with him, not now. He must’ve caught onto it, because without another word she felt the couch shift under her and the warmness disappeared just as it came. She placed her chin on top of her knees, the hold around them tightening, eyes absently staring at the coffee table in front of her.

*

Bandaged fingers wriggled a couple of times, testing the mobility Hershel assured her that she’ll see right away. After he finished patching her up for the fourth time since the farm, Kat had left the small group downstairs, taking a thinker set of clothes Carol had given her, quietly going to the second floor, feeling a strong need to be alone. Usually they’d all sleep in the same room or at most two rooms next to each other, regardless of the actual space. But all she wanted was to be far away from them for a while. 

After standing in the middle of the small hallway on the second floor, pondering between searching the room in front of her, that Carol and Maggie had already rummaged through, or try the door at the end of the hallway, Kat ended up behind door number two. It was a small bathroom, already lit up with candles that the two women must have placed everywhere in the house so they could find their way through if needed. 

She peeled off the sticky layers off her body, grunting as she pulled the shirt over her head. Kat lifted her gaze only to be met by her own reflection, but she almost didn’t recognize herself. And it wasn’t the dried up blood’s fault. Even masked by the bruise under her sports bra, her ribs were more than visible, brushing bandaged fingertips across them. The belts around her hips were not there only for her weapons anymore, she needed them to keep the cargo pants around her bony form. 

Brushing off the obvious bad shape her body was in, Kat changed into the fresh set of clothes. Luckily, they had found thermal clothing, thing that she was more than grateful for. She fastened the belts around her hips, nodding satisfied at the way the dark green leggings hugged her thin form before pulling a bright green thermal jersey over the black long sleeved shirt. 

Checking herself one last time in the mirror, Kat pressed her lips into a thin line, before leaving the bathroom. She walked towards the stairs, only to notice the bedroom door left wide open. As soon as she stopped in front of the room, a well-known smell made her eyes widen before she saw the small cloud of smoke being blown to the ceiling.

‘Bastards were smokers.’

Daryl was crouched next to the broken bed frame, legs sprawled on the floor in front of the door, leaving close to no space at all for anything else in the small room. He raised his arm, offering the pack of smokes to Kat. Watching her lean in to grab it, he shifted on the floor, making room for her to sit next to him. Kat dropped to the floor, mouth already watering and lungs screaming inside her chest as she lit up the cigarette. 

After a couple of minutes of deafening silence covered faintly by the people downstairs rummaging and shifting pieces of furniture, Daryl put out the remains of his cigarette on the carpet before pulling another one out, lighting it up. ‘Kat, talk to me.’ 

‘What’s there to talk about?’ She kept her voice steady but soft. She really didn’t want to talk right now, but she knew he wouldn’t let go.

‘Always pulling that crazy shit and try to hide what it does to ya.’ Daryl kept his eyes on the door frame, pausing for a few seconds, before he heard her scoff. He turned his head to face her crouched form next to him, watching her shaking her head slowly. ‘Them things ya’re blurting out after, yeah I noticed. Ya try to hide the way it gets to ya. Them bastards were killers, rapists. I know ya’re tough, but I also know what it do to ya.’

‘And what do you want me to say? That I was scared?’ Kat locked eyes with him, not really wanting to have the conversation he kept pushing her to engage into. She shook her head again, sucking her teeth as Daryl kept silent. ‘I wasn’t. You know-’ She curled her upper lip, trying to keep it in, looking away in a silly attempt to hide from his gaze. ‘-for a second there, I was praying that you and Rick won’t show up.’

‘What d’ya mean?’ Daryl furrowed his brows in slight confusion, his thoughts spinning in his head, trying to understand what she was saying.

‘They were my prey. I wanted to kill them, because I knew I would’ve enjoyed it. Because it would’ve made me feel better. Thrilled, even. The anticipation.. God, it electrified me.’ Kat blew out the smoke, leaning her head to the side, watching him biting down on the inside of his lower lip. ‘Yeah, no words for that, right? Daryl, something in my head’s not right. ‘

‘Like getting’ yer fix.’ Daryl watched that pretty head of hers fall on her arm as she hugged her right knee to her chest. ‘Merle told me ‘bout some stuff like that. Called it the joy of combat. Told me stories ‘bout these guys that were getting a thrill out of it, actually lookin’ forward to do it.’

‘Yeah. Like getting my fix. While I was serving.. I was so scared on the battlefield at first. Horrified of what I was sent there to do and what would have become of me.’ Kat watched him from the corner of her eye, looking for any sign of repulsion or horrified reaction at what she had told him. She pressed her lips in a small smile. As always, he didn’t look at her judgingly. Not him. ‘After the a few days, I started realizing what the firecracker snapping sound was. Actually what it meant.’

‘What?’ Daryl continued to abuse the bruised flesh of his bottom lip, watching them tired eyes glaze over with unspilled tears and all he could think was how unfair her world had been to her, making the woman in front of him lock herself in a place where she tortured herself on a daily basis for the past she had been thrown into at a young age. 

‘Enemy contact.’ Kat raised her head, tired eyes glued to the ceiling, watching absently the shadows moving as the candles flickered lazily around them. ‘It’s the sound of supersonic rounds passing directly overhead. I got used to it. I kind of started enjoying it at some point. I even wanted to go out, get into stuff. It became a daily thing, instead of sitting around and doing nothing, waiting for my death.’ She lowered her head, facing Daryl again, a forced smile creeping up on her lips. ‘Heard your brother got himself hooked on drugs. The biggest high you can ever get is a natural adrenaline rush. Somebody trying to kill you. There’s nothing that will ever come to that rush. I’m not a fighter as you once told me, Daryl.’ 

He would’ve been stupid not to acknowledge the fact that she was dangerous, but he knew that ever since the CDC incident. _The way Kat put herself in front of the walkers to help a bunch of strangers._ The highway. _The way Kat tried to help Sophia._ The bar. _The way Kat saved Glenn’s life._ Randall. _The ways she tried to redeem herself._ And there was so much more to her than that and she couldn’t see it, trapped behind the death veil she had thrown over her eyes by the countless things she did in her past. And on a certain level, he could understand what dwelling on the past could do to someone.

Kat watched him silently for a few long, agonizing seconds that felt like hours, wondering what was going on behind those blue squinting eyes, how will he push her away after what she shared with him. 

‘Kat, ya may have sum screws loose, think we all have at this point.’ He cocked an eyebrow at the small curve of her lips as she tried to smother a chuckle. ‘But I’ve seen ya. Like really seen ya. And everything ya did served these people good. And I’m sure it’ll stay the same. Ye’re good people.’

‘You start to sound like Dale.’ Kat sighed a bit relieved, smile spreading to her cheeks as she rolled her eyes amused. There he went again, pushing through the image of her real self like it was nothing, not judging her for what she really was. 

‘Damn right I am. Someone needs to knock some sense in that head of yers.’ Daryl patted his thigh, slightly cocking his head to his left. ‘Now rest it a bit, yer head’s in charge of the back door in one hour.’

‘Asshole.’


	20. So damn much

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've been having some troubles with some aspects of the story, more like having different ideas on how to tie up some things in my head, because I swear it's a mess up there. I've finally came to terms with my inner voice and finished this chapter after such a long time, I'm so sorry! T_T
> 
> Also, at some point I stated doodling (because it's way better than actual work) and the way Kat's color scheme came out made me want to make some changes in the already posted chapters, which I already did before this chapter was published. Looking back at how I imagined her at first, makes me wonder why my mind wanted to make her stand out so much. Well, considering that my english is not my first language, my damn brain wrote her hair color as **white** , when in fact the correct term is **grey**. Sue me, I myself want to sue me. Again, amber eyes are such a rarity that I'm actually cringing at the fact that I wrote Kat as I did, so I just switched her **amber** eyes to **green** eyes. Not so cringy, eh
> 
> Well, I'm sorry for the sudden changes and please enjoy this chaotic chapter coming from a chaotic wanna be writer!

The empty glass was long forgotten on the box next to her that served as a nightstand, elbows propped on her knees as she rested her forehead on her hands, eyes absently watching the blood dripping off the belts and straps on her thigh. They had moved to the prison a while ago, an apparent safe feeling setting upon their group until that day. They had lost T-Dog and Lori. Carol. At least that last drop of cheap vodka that she and Carol had literally smuggled into the prison a couple of days before numbed her a bit. But it was not enough. Kat felt her throat tightening again, sobbing quietly as her body shook every now and then with every breath her lungs struggled to get. She felt exhausted and she was more than aware that she wasn’t able to cry anymore. Only twitching slightly once in a while as if her body couldn’t control it itself. 

The high-pitched cry startled her, echoing through the entire cell block before shushing noises covered it until it died out. Kat wiped her cheeks mechanically, but the heels of her palms dug in the dry skin, making her flinch at the burning sensation spreading through her cheeks. She pulled at the straps and belts until they all dropped to the floor, stepping over them without even glancing in their direction.

Kat pushed herself on her feet, quickly looking in the mirror, taking in the red puffy eyes that stared back at her, before splashing some cold water on her face. Stepping outside the cell, she leaned against the metal rail, watching Daryl rocking the baby back and forth, a bottle of formula in his hand while he softly cooed at the precious soul in his arms. She smiled weakly at the image unfolded in front of her, eyebrow rising amused at the surprising fact that Daryl was good with babies. Who would’ve thought?

But as soon as that realization sunk in, Kat felt a bit taken aback. Sure, they had been messing around every now and then. Actually more than messing around, but they never talked about it. She herself hadn’t put it out there in words and neither did he. She thought they’d be on the same page. Until that moment. What page was she on? Blue eyes locked with hers, as he turned around, pacing back and forth with the baby still in his arms. Kat mirrored the small smile he threw her way, watching him cock his eyebrows at the baby, blue eyes shifting between the small bundle and her frame a couple of times. 

This wasn’t just a fling. Not for her. But Kat knew she wasn’t able to give that to him, not then, not ever. The fact that she didn’t come forward with something like that was not right. The fact that it bothered her so much, it was only proof of how strongly she felt about him. But maybe he didn’t want her that way. It was bold of her to assume he did, maybe he was just letting off steam and she had been at the right place and at the right time for that to happen. Over and over again.

She cleared her throat, stepping away from the rail as soon as the thoughts started spinning around in her head and the walls seemed like they were closing in, any trace of a smile faded away quickly. Confusion crept under her skin, forcing her to question whatever they were doing. Sure, it felt more than right and yes, she would go to hell and back for him. She loved him. Was it just her? What exactly were they to each other? 

Partners. She exhaled through her nose at that thought, not even a chuckle coming out. She sure as hell picked a great word, a tad confusing, thing that left enough room for a lot of things to happen without questioning it. Backing up one another. Comforting each other. Sharing the same bed. Fucking each other’s brains out. She could feel the tingles rushing down her body straight to her belly at that thought, shamefully walking back to her cell before dropping on the mattress and curling into a ball.

Not even a couple of minutes after, she heard movement on the steps outside the cell, footsteps slowly making their way in her direction. Kat listened silently, until they came to a halt, her ears picking on the faint shuffle of the sheet’s fabric that she hanged days ago in order to get more privacy. 

‘Ya okay?’

‘Yeah.’

Daryl stopped in front of their makeshift queen sized bed that they both had worked on in the first few days, after Kat threatened him with them blowjobs in front of a possible audience, a bit pissed off at the fact that they had been sleeping at the top of the stairs where everyone could see them. He brushed them thoughts off quickly, eyes lingering on the curled ball of a woman in front of him, clearly distressed and upset. And a bit drunk. His eyes fell on the empty bottle poorly tucked away behind some boxes, before turning his attention to her.

He was stupidly bad at comforting people, really, but he couldn’t bear the sight in front of him, not with her looking so defeated. Daryl pushed off his boots, dropping lazily on the mattress next to her, an arm slowly curling around her waist, pulling her closer to him until her back was flushed against his chest.

‘C’mon, spit it out.’ He propped himself into his elbow, moving his arm from around her waist to gently brush the rebel hairs off her right cheek. It had been a long, painful day for everyone, but he was almost damn certain that whatever was wrong with her, it was something else. Call it a sixth sense, but he came to know her more than he knew himself. He was met with nothing but silence for a couple of minutes and if he wouldn’t know better, he could’ve sworn she had fallen asleep. ‘Kat?’

He felt her body shifting next to him, slowly rolling in place on the mattress until he was met by that freckled face of hers, swollen green eyes meeting his curious gaze. Thick eyebrows frowned at the sight in front of him, bringing his hand to her face, his thumb slowly caressing her cheek. ‘Kat, what’s wrong?’

‘With everything that’s happening around us. I don’t know.’ Kat bit the inside of her cheek, eyes locked on his. ‘What are we doing?’ As soon as the words left her lips, she was met with a confused, almost dumbfounded look, thing that somehow threw her in a fit of weak and silent laughter that could’ve been mistaken as a hiccup crisis. ‘I feel like a stupid teenager right now, but I’m serious.’

As soon as her silent chuckles died out, Daryl’s face softened, slowly taking in whatever it was that ate at her from the inside. Sometimes that pretty head of hers could be so damn slow. After so many months on the road, together, always by each other’s side, always falling asleep in his arms, always comforting each other and yet them questions on her were baffling at this point. 

‘Well, ya do sound like a drunk fifth grader.’ A side smirk tugged at the corner of his lips as the words came out, thumb still caressing them freckles. He watched as that thin eyebrow of hers shot up, like she always did when she was a bit amused or straight up offended and at that moment he was almost certain she was both. 

‘Don’t think so poorly of me. That watery thing won’t get me drunk.’ Kat rolled her eyes, pillowing her head with her right arm, before gently pushing her left hand against his chest, resting it there and absently clutching the fabric of his shirt. He didn’t brush off her question but he didn’t answer it either. ‘It’s okay if you want us to be, you know..’ Kat broke the eye contact, dropping her gaze to his chest, while slightly shrugging. ‘Nothing.’

Daryl watched her struggle to choose her words, them eyebrows frowning deeply in a cute way as she tortured herself with what she was trying to say. He chose to keep silent, to let her do her thing and let it out, because as wrong as her thoughts were, he knew she had to say it out loud in order to be able to get past it. 

‘Saw you with the baby earlier. I’m not able to give you that.’ 

His eyes softened as soon as he registered them words. He felt a bit taken by surprise. It was miles away from what he thought she would say, but he started to get the picture of what was actually going behind those pretty eyes. He gently cupped her cheek, thumb faintly brushing against the tip of her nose as he pressed his lips in a straight line. ‘I know.’

‘You know?’ Kat frowned, green eyes meeting his soft blue eyes again, as slight confusion settled in.

‘Well I ain’t stupid, Kat. Put the pieces together after a while. Ya never ask or search for women stuff when we’re making a run or something. Saw the way ya looked at Lori sometimes too. And even that night, the first time, at the farm and after that.. Ya never once got concerned about.. Ya know.’ Daryl bit down on the inside of his bottom lip, not sure if asking about it would be a good idea.

Kat noticed the way he looked at her, obviously curious about how and why it happened, but he was afraid to ask, not voicing it out. ‘One of the requirements of getting the final approval for what I was doing before all of this was to get a hysterectomy.’ Kat averted her eyes from his gaze again, fumbling with a button of his shirt, thin eyebrows rising every once in a while as she continued whispering. ‘Sterilized in order to never be put in a situation where I would experience such weakness as worrying more about a family than my mission.’ Kat bit the inside of her cheek, trying to keep her emotions under control. ‘Wasn’t even my choice. I had no idea. They put me under during a routine checkup as they said. Woke up only after it was already done. You get the picture.’

Daryl watched her struggling to keep a straight face, but her bottom lip quivered pushing forward in a small pout. He had figured it out on his own, but after hearing the exact circumstances, it made him feel more than powerless. But to think she was even considering that as a damn deal breaker for him, if anything Daryl was more upset with the himself and the fact that he hadn’t made it clear for her after all those months at each other’s side. He moved his hand from her cheek, calloused fingers wrapping around the small restless ones on his chest. 

‘Even before shit went down, I never went around getting myself in any of them relationships. Slept around every once in a while, but nothing more. Wasn’t my thing. Wasn’t up for that. I have no damn idea how to do these things.’ He trailed off, watching her frown again, without looking him in the eyes. ‘But we both know this right here ain’t just nothing.’ Daryl tightened the hold around her small hand, brushing his thumb against the soft skin of her fingertips. ‘And to think ya’re putting yerself down for what was done to you, to think I would put ya down for that...Kat.’ He leaned in, pressing his forehead against hers, softly nudging that pretty head of hers. ‘Babe, look at me.’ 

‘What?’ Kat pressed her lips in a thin line, meeting his gaze as he slightly pulled back. Thin brows furrowed, as she tried to keep her voice steady. ‘Wouldn’t you?’ And nothing in the world would have prepared her for what she was seconds away from hearing, all coming from the man she had realized that she loved so strongly, that it made her want the impossible to happen.

‘Never.’ Daryl pressed his forehead against hers once more, blue eyes not even once moving away from hers. ‘Ya’re all I want, Kat.’ He pulled back again, pressing his lips on her forehead. ‘All I need.’ He leaned in, gently kissing the tip of her nose before getting on the same eye level with her. ‘Ain’t good with this stuff, but I know one thing.’ He squeezed them small fingers once more. ‘I love ya.’

For a second, Kat was almost sure that her heart stopped beating and felt everything descending into a small warm chaos inside of her, content mixing with regret, everything getting out of control quickly as soon as she felt his lips pressed against hers. It wasn’t the hungry, sloppy type of kiss that made her mind go blank. It was soft, but heavy at the same time and full of something she wouldn’t have imagined she’d ever feel this strongly.

‘The way ya bite the inside of yer cheek when ya’re thinking hard bout somethin’.’

He pulled away slightly, leaving open mouthed kisses down her jaw while whispering against her skin. His lips brushed against the soft skin under her ear, leaving a hot burning trail down her cheek, goosebumps spreading down her neck and collarbone. 

‘How ya’re always cocking them eyebrows when ya’re pissed off.’

Kat felt his lips curl into a smile against her ear as he let go of her hand, pushing her on her back and pinning her small frame under his body.

‘The way ya curl in a ball to my side when ya’re sleepin’.’

She felt him shift his weight as he propped himself on his elbow, calloused fingers gently tracing the burning skin on her freckles cheek and down the nape of her neck, while his other hand made its way between her and the mattress, trapping itself on the small of her back. 

‘The way them tiny nimble fingers always seek mine.’

Her back arched under his touch like it had a mind of its own, pushing the back of her head farther into the pillow as she felt him sucking on a soft patch of skin on her collarbone. Her hands clung to his frame, fingertips gently digging into the fabric of his shirt as she slowly pushed and pulled him closer. 

Daryl traced the flourishing hickeys peppered on her collarbone with small kisses here and there, before his lips pressed softly under her chin, raising his head to look her in the eyes as soon as he felt the well-known shudder spreading through her small body. 

‘The way ya crept under my skin.’ He pressed his forehead against hers, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, slightly amused at the fact that he didn’t sound like himself, because he never had the chance to voice stuff like that ever before, and as much as it felt out of character for him to say all those things, he meant it. Whatever he said, he always meant it. Especially with her. ‘Ain’t even enough time to call them all out. Love all them things bout ya. Love ya more than that pretty head of yers can imagine.’ 

Those piercing blue eyes stared down at her so softly, so lovingly, like no one else ever did before and it turned every crumb of guilt that pulled at her from the inside until that moment, into one of the warmest feelings, spreading through every cell of her body and flooding every corner of her soul.

Small hands traced random patterns on his shoulder blades, before her slender arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer, until the tip of her nose brushed against his. 

‘Love you too.’

It came out as a soft whisper, but as soon as her the words rolled off her tongue, she felt his lips crash against hers again, with the same soft and heavy feeling as before. Kat tightened her grip, pulling him as close as possible, the vodka lingering on her tongue mixing with his taste as she parted her lips, softly curling her tongue around his. She pulled away, slowly tracing his bottom lip with the tip of her tongue, watching those hooded blue eyes staring right back at her, all mesmerized, but with that dangerous glint of savageness that always made her knees buckle.

Her hands dropped to his sides, slowly tracing the waistband of his khakis, teasingly brushing her fingertips across the sensitive skin, drawing a low growl out of him. That was the moment in which she would have always flashed a devilish grin at him, torturing him a bit before giving in, but it didn’t feel right. Not now. She wanted him as close as possible, she wanted him under her skin and so deep inside her that she’d have to wonder where one begins and the other start.

He must have caught onto it, or maybe he felt the same, because as soon as her hands faltered, she felt him pull away, not even once breaking the eye contact as he got off the bed and unbuckled his belt. Kat didn’t even think twice as she pulled the white tank top over her head, dropping it carelessly to the floor, before tugging at the waistband of her thighs, all the while watching him get rid of his clothes, and if she’d have t. 

Not even before every piece of clothing was successfully scattered all around them, Kat pushed herself on her knees, slender arms reaching out to him. She watched as his eyes roamed hungrily over her naked body before he leaned into her embrace. Their lips met again, sending jolts of electricity down her spine, both of them gasping between the open mouthed kisses, as she pulled him back on the bed, eagerly trapping herself between the mattress and that perfect body of his. 

Calloused fingers caressed the soft skin of her thigh, gently tracing the soft curve of her hip before digging in the sensitive skin behind her knee, pushing her legs apart as his lips moved down her neck. The hypnotic feeling of his skin on hers made her mind go blank every damn time. Kat let out a soft moan, spreading her legs wide open, sighing in content at the way his hips fit perfectly between her thighs.

Daryl raised his head, pressing his forehead against hers, tracing the curves of her hips and gently brushing his thumb across the healed scars on her waist, squeezing her round perky breast before cupping her freckled face. ‘So damn much.’

‘So damn much.’ A shaky breath left her lips as she echoed his words, hooded blue eyes never leaving her for even a second, while she felt him slowly pushing inside of her. Her lips parted slightly as her breath stuck in her throat for a few seconds, letting out a shaky moan at the feeling of being slowly filled up. The way he stretched her insides made her eyes roll at the back of her head, but as soon as she was about to give in to the feeling, Daryl stopped.

‘Look at me.’ His voice was heavy and strained, but soft at the same time, while he tried to keep himself from buckling up into her, his thumb brushing against her plump bottom lip.

Kat was more than a shaky mess, nodding softly while biting down on her lower lip, still feeling the burning sensation his thumb had left on it. And as soon as she nodded, she felt him slowly pushing deeper inside her, keeping her eyes locked on his, releasing her quivering bruised lip only to let out a muffled moan that turned to a whimper.

Letting out a low growl at the way Kat, his woman, trembled under him, Daryl leaned in, greedily pressing his lips against hers, a satisfied smirk tugging at his lips as her pretty eyes rolled at the back of her head again, swallowing every whimper and every moan crawling up her throat, pulling out just a bit, only to fill her up again, slowly pumping inside her, engraving in the back of his mind how beautiful she looked, how good he made her feel, the way she desperately clung to him, small fingers digging in the scarred skin on his back, as her slender legs wrapped around his hips, pushing him deeper with every thrust. 

‘Mine.’

Even drowned in the sloppy sounds echoing in their cell, Kat’s eyes fluttered open as soon as the growl left his lips, the way he said it sending shivers down her spine and straight to her core, feeling the sweet, sudden clench of her walls squeezing him inside of her. Her breath hitched as her body begged for its sweet release, her hands dropping lower, nails digging in his ass cheeks, as she desperately moved her hips to meet his. 

She felt his fingers curl around her forearm as his other arm snaked behind her, circling her waist, bringing her up in a swift motion as his back hit the wall behind them with a silent thud. Kat shifted on top of him, trying to catch her breath as she bent her legs on each side of his hips, softly panting and gasping at the way he twitched inside of her.

Her arms wrapped around his neck, leaning in and pressing her forehead on his shoulder, his hand caressing the small of her back while the other was sliding down the side of her waist, as she raised her hips, slamming herself against him. A high pitched moan left her lips before he raised his hand and rested it on the back of her neck, slowly caressing it as he pressed his lips against her ear, shushing her between muffled grunts and low moans. 

She arched her back as she moved her hips in a chaotic rhythm, gasping at the way his fingers dug in her skin, guiding her movements as he thrusted inside her at the same time, hitting that sweet spot over and over again. Her body had a mind of its own, erratically moving on top of him as she got closer and closer, until she felt his teeth sinking in the soft patch of skin on the nape of her neck, pushing her over the edge in the blink of an eye, riding her orgasm as white dots clouded her vision. 

Coming to her senses slowly as she felt him twitch inside of her the same way her body convulsed every now and then, she raised her head, green eyes taking in the way he tried to catch his breath and how his hooded blue eyes were glazed over, lazily blinking but not even once breaking away from hers. 

His fingers massaged slowly the back of her head, making her lean into his touch and sigh in content, before his hand slid down the nape of her neck and up her cheek, gently pushing away the damp strands of hair stuck to her freckled face.

Kat tilted her head to the side, admiring the image in front of her, the man she loved so damn much looking back at her so tenderly, as her fingers pushed his damp hair to the side, mirroring his gesture unintentionally. She leaned in, closing the distance between them and softly pressed her lips against his.

‘I love you.’


	21. His girl

A deep frown settled on her face as soon as she opened her eyes. Her surroundings were nothing but foreign and as much as she wanted to understand what happened exactly, the sharp pain spreading through her skull and the vein that kept pulsating on her temple wouldn’t let her focus. Kat sobered up suddenly as she tried to move, ropes and handcuffs restraining her movements. Tied up to a chair in a room she had never seen before. 

‘This is great.’ She let out a grunt as she yanked at the handcuffs around her wrists behind the chair. The metal dug into her skin painfully and before she’d be able to do any more damage, Kat stopped, quickly going over the ways she could get out. Throwing her gaze briefly around the room, her eyes fell on an almost empty tool kit set on the table next to the door. 

Before being able to come up with a solid plan, the movement and ruckus created outside the room she was in threw her off as soon as she recognized Glenn’s voice. Glenn. 

‘Shit.’ They were making a run for..something. She was with Glenn. And Maggie. Scowling at the missing pieces that failed to fall in place to make her understand how they ended up where they were, Kat listened to the crashes and snaps behind the wall, the blood rushing through her veins in a frenzy at the way Glenn yelled and howled.

Kat grabbed her left thumb, biting down on her lower lip as she braced herself, muffling a groan as soon as the joint popped, dislocating her own thumb. She slipped her hand forcefully through the handcuff, the cold metal digging into her skin and grazing the dislocated joint in the process. As soon as the metal dropped off her hand, only dangling around her right wrist, Kat pulled her arms in front of her, holding her breath as she popped her thumb back into place.

She heard Glenn shouting again while the tugged desperately at the ropes around her ankles, freeing her legs in a matter of seconds, but the footsteps coming from outside the wall stopped in front of the room she was in. Kat leapt for the table as the door was being unlocked, grabbing the bolt cutter, slightly frowning at the blood dripping on its jaws. She pressed her palm on her forehead as the lock outside clicked open, quickly bringing her palm in front of her face, watching her own blood dripping down her forearm.

Kat wiped it on the front of her white tank top pressing her back against the wall as the door opened, giving her enough time and little cover to wait for whoever entered the room before bashing their head in with the bolt cutter. Silence set in for a few seconds, before the door was forcefully slammed open, keeping it from smashing against her by pressing the sole of her boots against it. 

‘Princess, I know ye’re there, don’t make this harder for both of us.’ 

The barrel of a gun was slowly pushed in the small opening between the open door and the wall to her left where she was trapped. Watching the damn thing pointed directly at her, Kat let out a shaky breath, her hands gripping at the bolt cutter’s handles, bringing it in front of her, before slamming her foot against the door while gripping the gun’s barrel between the blades, changing its aim to the ceiling. The gunshot deafened her for a second before she realized the man let go of the gun and it was still stuck between the blades. Kat let go of one of the grips, before taking the gun and aiming it in front of her, slowly pushing the door away with the tip of her boots. 

But nothing and no one was in sight and before she had time to react, a balled up fist crashed straight into her face from behind the door, as she pulled the trigger. A metallic sound filled the room as the bullet bounced off something and she felt herself slammed against the wall before being thrown to the floor. Trying to catch her breath, Kat felt a blade being pressed right under her chin, trying to see the man that tackled her to the ground through the blood that splattered on her eyes. Fucker broke her nose.

‘Martinez, ya fucker, told ya to cuff the lady’s hands to the damn chair!’ 

Kat pushed the heel of her palm on her closed eye, looking at the man hovering over her, while smearing the pooling blood on her temples and off her eyelids. Ignoring the sharp pain spreading through her probably broken nose, Kat watched the man looking at the door as soon as someone else walked in, before his gaze fell on her again.

‘If ye’re a good girl, I might help ya with that.’ 

She stopped squirming, giving in after realizing that he wasn’t joking around with the blade pointed at her neck. ‘Like bashing my head in?’

‘We do what we gotta do, sugar. Ya tried to tear me a new one.’ The man grabbed her arm, the other, probably Martinez, held a rifle pointed at her. She was pulled to her feet before being pushed back on the damn chair, dropping his arm from her neck, briefly looking over his shoulder at the man behind him before facing her again. ‘Ya don’t remember that, do ya?’

Kat shook her head, confused but warry eyes squinting at the man kneeling between her legs. She let her arms dangle on her sides, her gaze shifting briefly between the rifle guy and back to the man in front of her, wishing the cuffs around her right wrist would be of any use, watching him scowl at the loose ropes on the ground before she focused her gaze on the dent in the metal on his arm. Thin brows furrowed, the man had some kind of a prosthetic arm. Something about him bugged the hell out of her, but she couldn’t put her finger on what it was. Blue eyes shot up meeting her gaze, as a side smirk tugged at the corner of the man’s lips.

‘Look, missy. Don’t want this any more than ya do, all I need is to know where my little brother’s at. Pizza boy right there’s havin’ some fun ‘cause he wouldn’t tell me anything. Boss is on his way to the hot piece of ass too, so that means ye’re my business.’ The man grinned up at her, cocky smirk pissing her off more than it should have. He grabbed her right hand, bringing it on her lap as he unlocked both cuffs.

‘Won’t tie ya up again and my friend outside can take care of that nasty shit-‘ he raised his prosthetic arm, jabbing it in her face, hovering the blade around her broken nose. ‘-if ya just tell me what I wanna know. Or we can have some little fun till boss comes around, I see ye’re no stranger to the devil’s tango.’ 

Kat stared him down as he rested his elbows on his knees, loose rope in his good hand, scowling at the sleazy line and feeling awfully exposed under his gaze, as his blue eyes checked her up and down repeatedly. Her body froze in an instant as he moved his prosthetic arm closer to her, sharp blade slowly tracing her collarbone before grazing the bruised skin on her neck.

‘Someone’s being a possessive cunt. Leaving all these marks on ya. Only makes ya even hotter.’ He bared his teeth into a nasty grin as the words came out, a raspy chuckle thundering inside his chest.

Kat kept silent, but couldn’t get her upper lip in control, quivering as it curled up in disgust. The man knew Glenn, he called him pizza boy, so she was pretty sure Glenn hadn’t had a casual conversation with the man about his pre-apocalypse profession, which meant they knew each other long before all of that. But the man didn’t recognize Maggie. 

‘Merle? Why’s our guest here untied?’

The voice came from somewhere outside the room, but Kat couldn’t care less. Everything clicked into place as she frowned at the one in front of her who was missing one hand. He was looking for his little brother.

‘Holy fuck. You are Merle Dixon.’ 

‘One and only, missy.’ The man burst into laughter as he was about to push himself on his feet, giving an amused look to the new face standing in the door frame. 

Kat took advantage of that split of a second and clicked the cuffs around her right wrist, leaving the other one open. Brother of Daryl or not, she didn’t falter and wrapped her legs around Merle’s neck as he tried to get back on his feet, snaking her arm around his forehead. She forced his head back, pushing the teeth of the open cuff under his chin.

‘Fuck ya think ya doin’, sunshine?’

Kat ignored his raspy alerted tone, keeping her eyes glued on how Martinez pointed that damn rifle at her, blinking away the blood that dripped down her lashes as her gaze moved to the well-dressed man standing casually in the door frame. Martinez took a step forward, unfazed by her actions, but as soon as his sole hit the ground, Kat yanked Merle’s head forcefully, grazing his skin with the open cuff. 

‘One more step and he’s done.’ Kat’s breath hitched, fully aware of how bad the situation looked for her. ‘I kill him, you kill me after, and no one wins.’

The well-dressed man smiled at her, before raising his hand in Martinez’ direction, signaling him to lower his aim. ‘It doesn’t really matter. We already know what we wanted to know. The other girl talked, Merle. Your brother’s at a prison, not far from here.’

Kat’s hands faltered for a second, enough for Merle to grasp her wrist with his good hand, twisting it in a nasty angle as her joint popped before the pain spread through her arm like wildfire. In a second of panic, she let go and pushed him away while getting a hold of her dislocated wrist. She felt the wind being knocked out of her lungs as his elbow dug into her stomach, sending her stumbling on her back while the wooden chair shattered to pieces.

That right there, it wasn’t happening. Couldn’t be happening. She was outnumbered, pushed into a corner, bruised and bleeding, and all she could think about was how someone as gentle as Daryl could have the same blood as the filthy monster towering over her. 

Kat tried to crawl away from him, watching him take a step back, but forcefully pushing herself on all fours as the room started spinning around her, listening to the faint shouts covered by a second set of footsteps coming her way before the tip of a boot was powerfully jabbed in her stomach again, drawing a pain filled howl out of her as the bile taste lingered at the back of her throat. Another kick made her body jolt in pain, limbs weak shuddering under her as she threw up on the floor, her stomach convulsing painfully. 

Trying to blink away the sickening dizziness, Kat turned her head to the side, watching the man who she deemed to be the boss scowl disgusted down at her. He leaned in, grabbing her messy braid as he looped it around his wrist before grabbing at the hair on the back of her head, forcefully bringing her back to her feet.

‘The other one was more compliant. As soon as her shirt was off, she told me everything I wanted to know.’ 

Kat felt the air stuck in her lungs, chocking her from the inside as the rage spread through her veins like wildfire. He touched Maggie. Only the thought made her sick to her stomach and her skin crawl, her nostrils flaring as she spat a nasty amount of bile mixed with blood in his eyes, slowly dripping down his cheek. She flashed a bloodied grin at the disgusted but unfazed look on the man’s face, before a dull pain spread through her skull and everything went black.

The pain spreading through her entire body, constantly pulsating in every limb and in every corner was a good hint that she was coming to her senses. Swallowing hard, the foul taste lingering on her tongue brought everything back in the blink of an eye. Her forehead was pressed on the cold floor, offering her a small amount of relief as the veins on her temple throbbed painfully.

‘Kat, is it?’

Green eyes shot wide open, slightly moving her head against the hard floor as she searched for him. His nasty, shit eating grin was not in place, but a more grim expression took over his sunburnt face as he leaned against the wall, next to the closed door, good arm and prosthetic arm folded against his chest.

Kat didn’t honor his question with an answer, settling for a dead cold look thrown in his way. She could barely move so anything like tackling him was out of the question. Her right hand twitched as a dull pain spread through her forearm, but something was different. She wriggled her fingers, recognizing the well-known restrictive feeling of bandages wrapped around her wrist. Squinting green eyes locked on his frame suspiciously, feeling the cuffs still attached around her bandaged wrist. 

‘Ye’re _his girl_ , ain’t ya?’

The look on his face was some kind of mix between regret and surprise, but Kat didn’t let it faze her anyhow. Somehow he connected the dots, but it was kind of late for any of that remorseful shit he was trying to pull. 

‘China boy wouldn’t stop yellin’ yer name while the Governor kept hittin’ ya. Kept yelling bout how my baby brother won’t forgive me and shit like that. Don’t think ya can remember that either.’

Kat swallowed hard, suddenly aware of how Glenn screamed earlier while she was trying to untie herself. Maggie. The Governor laid hands on her. She felt her breath hitch as her body started shivering, watching Merle taking a few steps towards her. As much as she wanted to move away from him, her body wouldn’t listen.

She silently scowled at him as he leaned in, using his good hand to grab her arm, ignoring the cuffs dangling on her wrist while locking eyes with her in a way that made it clear that he was the one to let them there on purpose, before pulling her on her feet. He threw her limp arm around his shoulder, before dragging her towards the door. Kat bit down on her lip until the coppery taste spread down her tongue, furious at the lack of strength in her body. 

The door opened with a loud metallic creak that only made the veins on her temples throb painfully, as Merle dragged her through the doorframe, between two armed guards and down the hall, before stopping in front of the next room on the left. She watched him push the latch to the side with his blade, before opening the door.

Kat raised her head, mentally bracing herself for what was about to come her way next, before catching a glimpse of Glenn’s protective frame in front of a scared Maggie in the far corner of the room. Kat’s eyes widened as her bottom lip started quivering in relief after seeing them both alive.

‘Oh my god, Kat!’

‘You did this to her?’

Her throat tightened painfully, seeing Glenn’s bruises in the dim light, hearing the rage lacing his words as he stomped in their direction. She felt Merle tense next to her, watching from the corner of her eye as he pointed the blade as a warning towards Glenn.

‘Stay put, China boy.’ 

Merle mumbled the words, waiting for Glenn to back off, before he dragged Kat into the room, slowly leaning down as he placed her small frame on the floor as if not to break her more than she already was. Kat didn’t let that slip, but whatever he was trying to do, he already fucked it up and he was more than aware. 

She yanked her arm from around his shoulders, weakly pushing herself away from him, until her back hit the wall behind her. Green eyes watched him linger for a couple of seconds, looking around the room before staring down at her as he sucked his teeth, turning around and slamming the door shut.

As soon as the latch’s metallic sound clicked, Glenn and Maggie rushed to her side, concerned eyes roaming all over her body, slowly turning into panic at the blood soaked hair and clothes. Kat felt Maggie’s gentle hands tracing something down her nose before she realized someone must have patched her up while she was out.

‘Is it broken?’

Kat nodded, clearing her burning throat, as she let both of them inspect her limp arms for anything that looked like a walker bite. Her eyes couldn’t focus on the frantic people in front of her, but caught a glimpse of a dead walker on the floor a few feet away.

‘I ain’t bit.’ Kat raised her eyebrows in surprise at her own hoarse voice that she couldn’t recognize, before cocking her head at the dead body. ‘You?’

She watched them both as they slightly moved their heads from side to side. Kat noticed the shirt Maggie was wearing. It was Glenn’s. She swallowed hard, a shaky hand wrapping around Maggie’s wrist.

‘What did he do?’

Her jaw clenched painfully after seeing the way Glenn tensed in front of her, scowling as he traced a poorly patched up cut on her temple. Her eyes shifted to Maggie, watching her shake her head, sighing.

‘Nothing. Just undressed me. Threatened to kill Glenn.’ Her voice broke as she pulled her arms away from Kat, letting them rest on her bent legs. ‘I told them where our group is.’

Kat let out a relieved sigh, letting her head fall against the wall, a metallic thud reverberating through it. She tried to think things through, but it was close to impossible at that point. Her head was constantly spinning and throbbing, as her whole body did. 

‘We have to get out of here.’ 

She watched Glenn nod, the room spinning around her again, frowning at the way his lips moved but she couldn’t hear any damn word coming out, before everything turned black once more.


	22. Courtesy of Asshole Dixon

The cracking sound coming from somewhere around her startled her, flinching awake as panic started spreading through her body. Green eyes opened wide only to be met by a familiar face staring down at her, shushing her into calming herself. Kat frowned up at Maggie before letting out a deep sigh, remembering exactly their circumstances.

‘You passed out.’

‘How long?’ Kat felt Maggie’s fingers gently combing through the tangled strands of her hair.

‘Maybe thirty minutes.’ 

Kat nodded, turning her head to the side in Maggie’s lap, watching Glenn as he struggled to take out the broken bone out of the dead walker’s flesh. Smart. Could be used as a weapon. She raised her right arm, watching the white bandages holding her wrist in place, but her attention flew to the cuffs locked around it, with the second ring still wide open, metal teeth exposed. Merle had left her that on purpose. Her lip curled in disgust as flashes of what happened earlier that day came flooding her mind again. She felt Maggie’s hand pressing on her forehead, making her look up at the woman only to see her frown.

‘You’re burning up.’

‘That’s the least of our problems.’ Kat struggled to get herself in a sitting position as Maggie’s hands gently pushed her from behind, helping her. Clinging to her arm, Kat got on her feet, wobbling a bit until she was sure enough to trust her footing. She heard bones cracking again as her eyes shot up in Glenn’s way. ‘That one’s enough. I have these.’ 

Glenn snapped his head to the side, noticing the open ring of the cuffs that she held up between her fingers.

‘Courtesy of Asshole Dixon.’ Kat took a step forward, struggling to ignore the way she swayed on her feet. ‘When that door opens, we need to make a break for it.’ She trailed off for a second, eyes shifting from Glenn to Maggie a couple of times. ‘I’m not in the best condition. Promise me-‘

‘No.’

‘Yes.’ Kat’s eyes snapped to Glenn’s face, watching him shake his head as he raised his chin, fully understanding where she was going with it. ‘I said, promise me. If I fall behind, run. It’s out best shot. I won’t drag you down. You need to get to the prison, let them all know what happened here.’ She watched them both as their internal struggle surfaced, their faces contorting in a deep frown before nodding.

Not even a couple of minutes later, the footsteps echoing down the hall made her body tense, pointing one finger at the door before waving two others into the air, signaling to Glenn and Maggie to wait next to it and as soon as the latch was pushed aside and the door was opened, Glenn jumped on Merle, pushing him aside and into the wall, before Maggie leaped after him, pushing the broken bone through the other man’s throat.

Kat took a step out, cursing in Russian as the automatic rifle went off, alerting everyone in the building of what was happening, as she threw herself behind Maggie, grabbing the dying man’s arm before pushing the heel of her palm into his biceps, forcing him to let go of the rifle. She leaned forward, almost losing her footing as she heard the punches fly behind her and Glenn’s grunts, grabbing the rifle and aiming it at a scowling Merle. 

For a second there, Kat was almost certain that she saw him cock his head down the hall while Maggie helped Glenn back on his feet, but not even a few seconds later, everything shattered as soon as she heard the sound of a safety going off behind her. She dropped the rifle to the floor and the next thing she saw was Merle’s frame towering over her and someone else walking right behind her. 

‘Sorry, doll.’

Her fingers curled around the open cuff, trying to decide if she should plunge the metal teeth into Merle’s throat or try to pounce on the man behind her, warry eyes watching the thin line his lips pressed into after the ragged whisper crawled up his throat. Losing any type of opening, she was pushed on her knees from behind, hurried hands patting her sides as her head was pushed forward, the barrel of a gun dug painfully in the skin on the back of her head. Kat flinched as someone yanked at the cuffs around her recovering wrist, asking for the key, mixing the English with Spanish as he yelled out.

‘Take it off.’

She swayed on her knees while the cuffs were taken away, before a grunt chocked her from the inside at the way she was yanked off the ground and forcefully pushed back into the same damn room. She heard Maggie and Glenn whisper somewhere next to her before she was thrown to the floor on her knees once again, a filthy bag covering her head. 

Kat bit the inside of her cheek, trying to understand what cosmic deity tried so hard to punish her. Not even twenty-four hours before all of that, Daryl said that he loved her. And after that, they made love, whispering it to each other over and over again until they both fell asleep in the other’s arms. They woke up before dawn, made love again and everything seemed to fall into place, everything was so damn perfect behind those four walls.

And now she was on her knees, bag over her head and rifle at the back of her head. She let out an amused sigh, thinking about all the times she had been in that same, exact situation before, but not even once was she thinking about a loved one. Because she hadn’t known love before him. On the other hand, she finally could understand the requirements forced on her. She had been weak, just as they said. She cared about other people around her. But that’s where they made the biggest mistake. Family wasn’t just blood. And caring for them was not weakness. Not after shit went down. It made her stronger. It made all of them stronger. Her family was back at the prison, probably wondering where she disappeared. Her family was six feet under, in graves she had dug with her own hands while struggling to keep the tears from spilling down her cheeks. Her family was on their knees, next to her, with rifles and guns pressed to their heads as they waited to be executed or whatever the hell the Governor had in his sick mind.

She reached out to her left, blindly patting the floor until her fingertips brushed against Maggie’s knees, feeling the woman flinch away from her touch.

‘It’s me.’

Kat heard her sobbing quietly, before gentle fingers wrapped around hers, tightly squeezing her hand as she heard footsteps rushing their way. She let out a shaky breath, jaw clenched as she tried to keep herself from breaking down, lips pressed into a heartbreaking smile behind the filthy bag. She only wished that she had more time with him.

A pair of hands dug into her arm yanking her up to her feet, not wanting to let go of Maggie’s hand as she heard her pleading. The back of a rifle hit painfully against her wrist, forcing her to let go while being turned around and pushed forward. 

She started breathing harder, her lips quivering, but tried to keep her voice clear and normal. ‘Maggie? Glenn?’

‘Shut the hell up.’

‘We’re here.’

The gun pressed threateningly between her shoulder blades dug painfully into her spine, as she was pushed forward, but as soon as she heard Glenn’s voice somewhere behind her, she relaxed a bit, letting out a relieved sigh. 

Something must have happened, because in the next second everyone around them started shouting and panicking, guns went off and while she tried to make sense of whatever was happening, Kat yanked the dirty rag off her head, warry eyes darting around her but to no avail. Smoke bombs. She was forcefully pushed against the wall, one of the guards trapping her, probably trying to get a hold on the prisoners before she saw him being knocked to the ground. 

A hand pushed through the smoke grabbed her by her arm, yanking her unsteady body away and down the hall. Kat tried to jerk her arm away from the man’s grip, before noticing the familiar leather belt around his hips, catching a glimpse of light reflecting off the silver metal of his Colt Python as they ran down the hall.

‘Rick?’

Furrowed thick brows met her only for a second, before she was dragged outside into the darkness. She felt herself slowing down and she could do was grunt in frustration at the weakness spreading through her body, making her knees give in. Tired green eyes snapped open wide as soon as she felt herself going down, before strong arms wrapped around her from behind.

‘Easy, c’mon.’

Kat let out a shaky breath, recognizing the raspy whisper behind her, while her limp arm was thrown around his shoulders. She felt her throat closing in, swallowing hard while letting out a silent whimper, watching Daryl’s expression darken at the mess in front of him while he dragged her down the street.

Everything was blurry and it spun around her, flashes of the street and Rick running in front of her fading to black every couple of seconds as she tried to stay awake. A low grunt escaped her throat while she felt herself being suddenly pushed in another direction before she heard a door slammed shut. Her back rested against something, struggling to open her eyes before frantic hands went up and down her body.

‘Kat.’

Blinking away the dizziness, thin eyebrows furrowed at the hand waved in front of her eyes while she reached out, bandaged hand getting a weak hold around his wrist. Daryl was crouched on the floor in front of her, between her sprawled out legs, trying to get a hold of her.

‘I think she has a concussion.’ 

Maggie’s voice. Turning her head excruciatingly slow, Kat caught a glimpse of Maggie’s frame leaning over her, a cold hand pressed against her forehead, before slender fingers forced her eyelids open.

‘Merle- Your brother did this.’

Good. Glenn was there too. But after that, silence followed. Kat watched those blue eyes shift to her, darkening once again, before her thin eyebrows furrowed in confusion at the lack of sound, even though she could clearly see their lips moving and their shadowy figures pacing around, everything slowly fading to black.

*

The shuffling around her was almost silent, but it was more than enough to wake her up. Her mouth was as dry as a desert and her tongue felt like cotton. Her eyes fluttered open as soon as something hovered above her face, cold water dripping slowly onto her chapped lips, before reaching out and grabbing the plastic bottle, greedily gulping down and successfully ignoring the way it spilled onto her face and down her cheeks, dampening the pillow under her head.

A deep breath was more than welcomed as soon as the plastic bottle was empty, shaky fingers crushing it into her balled up fist, while her wide eyes were stuck on the smiling face looking down at her, relief glistening clear as day in those light blue eyes.

‘Carol?’ Kat’s breath was stuck in her throat, shock and relief mixing inside her chest as she couldn’t tear her eyes away from a very alive Carol, sitting right next to her bed.

‘Good morning.’ The woman nodded, her bottom lip quivering slightly as she leaned her head to the side, letting out a shaky sigh before gently stroking Kat’s cheek.

‘What- How-‘ Kat tried to get up on her own, gentle hands rushing to help her get in a sitting position, slowly moving her numb legs off the mattress to dangle on the edge of the bed before her bare feet touched the cold floor.

Kat couldn’t move her eyes away from the woman she thought dead, teeth pressing firmly into her bottom lip in a failed attempt to keep her emotions in check, but as soon as her arms reached out and her shaky hands touched Carol’s shoulders, she couldn’t stop the tears from dampening her cheeks.

‘Trust me, I know.’ Carol whispered, her voice soft and shaky while she leaned in, throwing her arms around Kat’s shoulders in a firm hug, slowly rocking them both from side to side for some long seconds.

‘What do you mean?’ Kat’s voice broke, getting stuck in her throat and as much as she didn’t like being like that, she couldn’t care less at the moment. Carol, her friend was alive and well, in flesh and bones, right there in her arms.

‘You were out for more than two days, Kat.’

She watched her pull away slowly, Carol's arms sliding on her shoulders until her hands rested firmly on each side of her head. Thin eyebrows furrowed deeply as she tried to go over the last thing she could remember, but everything was fuzzy and blurred out. 

‘Rick got you, Maggie and Glenn back to the prison a couple of days ago. You were held in a place named Woodbury?’ Carol tried to freshen up her memory, concerned eyes roaming all over her face.

‘Merle. The Governor.’ Kat’s face contorted into a deep scowl, while she reached for her forehead, her fingertips sliding across the bandages wrapped around her head.

‘I need to get Hershel to check up on you, okay? I’ll be back in a few.’ 

Kat watched as Carol pulled away and got up to her feet, rushing outside the cell. ‘Wait. Daryl?’

Carol stopped abruptly in the doorframe, throwing a concerned look over her shoulder as she pressed her lips into a straight line. ‘They came back today.’


	23. Wrong guess

_‘What am I supposed to tell Carol?’_

_‘She’ll understand.’_

_‘Maybe.’ Rick breathed in deeply, before talking again, fully aware of how it’d affect him. ‘What about Kat? Do you think she’ll understand? What if she ain’t waking up?’_

_Daryl threw a short glare towards the car, teeth sinking in his lower lip as he felt something in his chest tear at him from the inside._

He bit down on the inside of his bottom lip, absently wiping the blood off one of them Kat’s hunting knives, lost in his thoughts as the scowl on his face deepened with each passing second. How could he even consider leaving her. Doesn’t matter that he came back. Back then he thought he was forced to choose between his dumbass of a brother and her. He couldn’t wrap his mind around the fact that he actually had to think about it. It wasn’t even a choice. And as much as it broke him, he knew what the right choice would be. _Her_. The only person who cared for him so deeply, the only person who muttered out those words that made him feel all kinds of things, fuzzy, happy, safe. But he thought about leaving her for the man who almost got her killed. 

He never wanted to punch Merle more than he wanted to in that moment. And he did. Merle kept on and on about all them things he and the Governor had done to her, to Glenn, Maggie. Daryl couldn’t understand if he wanted him to beat the living shit out of him right there in the middle of the road or his constant rambling was some sort of guilt eating him from the inside. He could still feel how his arm had swung on its own and his balled up fist crashed into Merle’s face, sending him tumbling down the road and successfully shutting that foul mouth of his.

_‘Girly there had real bad luck, ya fucker! Got yerself a tough ass broad, gotta give ya that.’_

She was out cold, bruised and bleeding, passed out in the car all while he was frozen in his tracks, looking at goddamn Merle baring his bloody teeth back at him, waiting for something, anything to happen, someone to wake him up from that shit show of a nightmare, because that’s exactly how it felt. But all Merle’s mouth could ramble about was how Kat tried to kill him. How he didn’t knew she was his woman. How he’d done everything to get back to his baby brother and he won’t let a damn woman get in his way. He said he tried to help her. Lying about giving her a way to fight back, leaving them useless cuffs on her. The man who he looked up to even though deep inside he knew he was no good. His own blood who hit the woman he loved, the woman he himself had been on the verge of leaving. He was no better than Merle for even considering that option.

_‘Ain’t going anywhere with ya.’ He heard Rick telling him to keep it down from somewhere behind him, but he couldn’t care less. He threw his arm in the air, turning his back to Merle, pacing around like a mad man. ‘Can’t. Won’t. Not after this, ya hear me?’_

_‘What’s that about? Ye’re leavin’ yer big brother out in the open for some girl ya met few months ago?’_

_‘Man, just go and do what ya know best and fuckin’ leave already.’_

If Merle had ever thought him something, it was how to turn your back on the people you call family, over and over again, especially when they needed you the most. Up to that point he considered Merle his family, even though his brother sure as hell didn’t act like it. His family was the small group he had been part of for the last few months. No, he was not like Merle. Not anymore. He kept his family fed and safe, and they did the same. She kept him warm at night and would go through hell for him. It was long overdue and it definitely broke his heart, but leaving Merle behind that day, all on his own, was arguably the healthiest decision he ever took in his goddamn life. 

The healed scars on his back felt like burning through his shirt, bringing back memories he thought he had left behind long ago coming back with all them gut-wrenching feelings and he was more than grateful for the fact that he was alone with them thoughts, out there in the woods, doing what he did best. 

The dim light coming through them swaying leaves shined across the spotless black blade he was obsessively wiping with the bloodied rag, before throwing the red piece of fabric into his back pocket and placing the knife on the belt around his hips, right next to its twin and opposite of where he kept his own. 

He felt exhausted and drained and it felt like there was no end to it. Ever since he returned with the group back at the prison after leaving Merle in the middle of the road, he could barely close an eye, feeling on edge every damn minute Kat was unconscious. Guilty. Ashamed. Worried. And as much as it pissed the hell out of him, there was no point in hiding the fact that he was worried about goddamn Merle as well. But the night before, Carol had basically pushed him outside the cell after he had paced around for hours, even skipping his shifts on keeping watch and with the fresh meat getting scarce and Hershel going on about how Kat would be needing them proteins when she’d wake up, he took it upon himself to go out hunting. 

But even that didn’t go as planned, he’d been out in them woods all night, missing them clear shots every once in a while like a damn rookie. The lack of sleep and the constant anxiety running through his veins were taking their toll on both his body and mind.

Eventually, he felt like calling it out to himself, he was too tired to keep on hunting, throwing one last look at the string around his shoulder, not very happy with the number of carcasses hanging to his side, but at least he was getting back to the prison with a couple of them rabbits he knew Kat loved to eat for some reason, before dragging his feet through the woods back to the prison.

‘I’d love myself some of that rabbit stew we’d use to cook, baby brother.’

The blood in his veins froze and Daryl could practically hear the smirk on his face even before turning around, yanking the crossbow off his shoulder and pointing it dangerously close to his face and right between his eyes. Blue eyes darkened as the arrow was already in its place, but his finger trembled on the trigger. 

‘Go get ‘em yerself.’ 

‘First ya punch me, now ya’re pointing that goddamn thing at me. At yer own brother.’ Merle raised his arms, keeping them in the air fully knowing the risk he was taking. ‘Officer Friendly there really rubbed on ya, didn’t he?’ 

‘Leave.’ 

Daryl growled the words, watching that stupid smirk of Merle’s turn upside-down. He chewed nervously on his bottom lip, trying to hold on every ounce of self-restraint he had left as every cell in his body howled in anger to just pull the damn trigger already, his mind bringing back flashes of an unconscious Kat. The blood. The bruises. His upper lip twitched in annoyance, the painful realization of how things degenerated between him and his own brother flooding his chest up to the point he couldn’t breathe normally. Daryl pulled his finger off the trigger, slowly letting the crossbow fall to his side, while his shoulders dropped, feeling defeated, before turning his back on Merle once again.

‘Just fuckin’ leave!’

‘Stop acting like a broad and listen to me for a goddamn minute, Darlina.’ Even without being held at gunpoint, Merle kept his arms in the air, watching Daryl walk away from him for the second time in two days. ‘Them people ya got at that prison of yers? They’re in danger.’

Something snapped inside him and before he knew, the string of rabbits and his crossbow were already on the ground as he turned around and charged towards Merle, tackling him to the ground. ‘That’s ‘cause of ya!’

‘No point in denyin’ that.’ Merle let out a grunt, trying to put some distance between them, rolling them both to the side until he felt Daryl let go, pushing him off and trying to get back on his feet. ‘But big brother Merle’s talking about somethin’ more specific.’

*

Kat sat on the edge of the bed, green eyes struggling to follow Hershel’s movements as he paced around the cell searching for something. She leaned in, closing some of the distance between them, noticing the small droplets of blood splattered on the back of his shirt. Something happened outside, but not even Carol wanted to tell her what exactly, leaving as soon as she mentioned Daryl. 

‘Walkers?’

She watched him prop himself onto his crutches, slowly making his way to the small stool placed right next to the bed. Kat waited as he struggled to shift his weight and drop on the stool safely, wary green eyes following him to be able to react at the slightest sign of wrong footing. But if she picked on something after Hershel had lost his leg, it was the simple fact that he didn’t like to be constantly helped from all sides. If anything, as wrong as it was, it probably made him feel like a burden. 

‘Just another day in paradise.’ Hershel smiled down at her, leaning in with a small flashlight in his hand. ‘How do you feel?’

Kat jerked her head back as soon as the sudden light was shoved in front of her left eye, struggling to keep both her eyes open as Hershel moved the flashlight from one to the other repeatedly.

‘Good, I guess.’ She involuntarily scowled at the sudden discomfort, with her eyebrows pushing into a deep frown, quickly followed by a few jolts of pain that felt like a knife had been shoved through her skull repeatedly. 

‘Wrong guess.’ Hershel pulled back with a deep sigh, turning off the flashlight before putting it away on the small table. ‘Good news is that your pupils respond as they should. Same size too. The not so pleasant news is that you might have something called post-concussion syndrome. Dizziness? Headaches?’

Kat pressed her lips into a thin line as she nodded, fully aware of what that was. The way she couldn’t really focus on anything more than a few seconds, the way she reacted at the sudden light, the way the pain spread through her head. 

‘You need to rest. And it’s not something you can treat lightly. You _must rest._ ’ ‘And even after you fully recover after this, you have to keep yourself away from situation that might lead to any type of head injury.’

‘I’m fine, really.’

‘Katerina. There’s no MRI or CT scans nowadays. There’s no doctor you can go to. And I can do only as much as I know, but we both know I’m no neurologist.’ Hershel leaned in again, giving her one of them troubled but caring smiles of his, placing his hand on top of hers and squeezing it lightly. ‘You were unconscious for two days.’

‘I know. I mean, I’m aware.’ Kat let out a frustrated sigh, tilting her head from side to side, clicking her tongue as soon as the dizziness kicked in. ‘I’ve heard those words before as well.’

‘You suffered other concussions?’ Hershel watched her nod as she bit down on the inside of her cheek, absently squeezing his hand. ‘That should settle everything. Kat, I’ll be honest. I don’t know how and if you’ll recover from the next one if you keep going like this.’

‘And what am I supposed to do? Do laundry and let everyone else fight for me?’ A not very convincing chuckle crawled up her throat after she whispered the words. ‘That’s not who I am, Hershel. I’m a fighter. I need to be out there so that other people can stay safe. That’s my purpose. What did you do to the hens that stopped laying eggs?’

Hershel watched her shake her head slowly, fully aware of how she felt. She didn’t want to be a burden. She saw herself useful only by putting herself in the front line, next to Rick and Daryl. Hershel’s face softened, his eyes dropping on their hands. ‘I surely didn’t send them to do laundry.’ He heard her chuckle, mirroring the small smile thrown his way as soon as he looked at her again. ‘But you’re not one of my hens. Being more careful and losing your purpose aren’t the same thing, right?’

‘Right. I’ll try.’ Kat shifted on the edge of the mattress, making enough room for Hershel to get back up, a defeated smile plastered on her face as he rummaged through a box. 

‘Think about the people that couldn’t close an eye while you were unconscious.’ Hershel pressed his lips into a knowing smile as he shuffled through the small bottles. ‘Carol had to forcefully send them away so I’d be able to check up on you.’ 

Kat could feel one of the warmest feelings spreading through her chest as soon as she registered the words. ‘Daryl?’

‘Mhm.’

‘Hey, doc? I have one small request.’ Kat reached out for the small bottle of pills as soon as Hershel turned around. ‘Don’t tell anyone about this, please. The risks I mean.’

He squeezed the crutches’ hand grips, looking down at the way her shoulders dropped as she clutched at the bottle of pills with both her hands, before throwing a short look in the doorway’s direction. ‘I won’t. But you can. Think about it.’ 

Kat threw a small grateful smile at him before the white sheet hanged in the doorway was pulled away and a pair of concerned blue eyes locked on hers. Oh, her Daryl. She watched him wait patiently for Hershel to step out, all the while he kept his eyes glued on her, not even blinking, as if the image of her being awake after all those days that felt like weeks, could disappear into thin air as soon as his eyes would close. 

She grasped one of the bedframe’s metal bars, pushing her bare feet on the cold floor as her heart started racing inside her chest. She remembered, she knew that he was the last thing she saw before blacking out and it didn’t feel like two entire days had passed since that, but she couldn’t explain why and how much she had missed him. It was almost painful.

As soon as she straightened herself up, Daryl slowly closed the distance between them, trembling hands reaching out to keep her steady, carefully touching her shoulders as if not to break her, as if he couldn’t believe his eyes. 

Kat watched him shake his head slowly, from one side to the other, his face contorting into an expression that she couldn’t decipher but it was damn straight breaking her heart, before seeing the faint quiver of his lips as he got closer, gently caressing the sides of her head. His hands dropped slowly to her sides, wrapping his arms around her as he dropped his head on her shoulder, burying his face in her neck.

‘I’m sorry.’

The muffled whisper, the way his voice broke, the dampness spreading on her skin, the way he clung to her. Kat felt something break inside her as she wrapped her weakened arms around him, her chest feeling heavy as she tried to brush off the silent cries that threatened to come out. The silence around them was soon covered by faint sobs, failing miserably. She felt so torn, seeing him like that and all because of her.

‘Babe, I’m fine.’ She tried to keep her voice steady, gently caressing his back. ‘I’m fine. It’s not your fault.’

All of it, it brought back the feeling she had back on that roof, watching her partner bleed out right next to her. When she was left all alone. She could see her old self in him in that moment and it broke her heart, thinking that Daryl, her Daryl, he would have to go through the same thing because of her. That for the past couple of days he had lived with the thought that he might lose her.

Everything was just too much for her, the fact that they lived in such a dangerous, cruel world dawning upon her. And for her it was like that even before the turn, but the painful part started only after they met. Maybe they had only a couple of days left together. Maybe they had thirty years lying ahead. Maybe they’ll grow old together in that prison, maybe the next day the roof would cave in. Maybe. So many maybes. She couldn’t lose him and under no circumstances she would make him go through that pain herself ever again. 

‘I can’t lose ya.’ He pulled away slightly, pushing his shoulder against his cheek, wiping away the tears on his blood stained shirt before pressing his forehead against hers, feeling the soft bandages instead of her freckled skin, an ugly reminder of what she went through.

Kat let her hands slide from his back, slightly pulling away before wrapping her fingers around Daryl’s wrists, bringing his hands in front of her, sliding her fingers between his. ‘And I can’t lose you.’ Kat lifted their holding hands, her fingers digging weakly in his scarred skin as she gently pressed the back of his hands against her lips.

‘Ya won’t. Ya can’t.’ Daryl shook his head vigorously, his hoarse voice barely audible. ‘Ya’re stuck with me.’ Them cute hands wrapped around his, so small, so weak, looking so frail compared to his rough looking ones. He watched her chin push forward shyly, a small smile brightening her damp freckled face as he leaned in, pressing his lips against hers.

Kat pulled back, feeling like she was finally able to breathe in normally since she opened her eyes earlier that day. She took a few moments for herself, taking in the way those blue eyes gazed at her so lovingly, before a small frown crept up on her face. The dirt, the fresh blood on his shirt, the leaves stuck in his hair.

‘What happened out there?’

‘Walkers. Lots of ‘em.’ Daryl bit down on the inside of his bottom lip, all the things that happened that day suddenly feeling way too real. ‘We got back just in time.’

‘You and who? Got back?’ She noticed the sudden worried expression tug at his features. ‘Is everyone okay?’

Daryl took one of them deep breaths, struggling to decide if calling it out as it was would mildly or extremely piss her off. ‘Yeah, everyone’s fine. The Governor dropped a walker bomb right inside the prison yard. I was out hunting. Bumped into Merle on my way back.’ Daryl didn’t fail to notice the way she squinted her eyes as soon as his brother’s name rolled off his tongue, but she kept silent.

Kat listened to the whole story, popping two of them painkillers, hearing the hurt and rage spiking up his voice as he went on about how he left Merle in the middle of the road after she passed out, how he went out hunting and crossed paths with him again and how he surprisingly warned them about the Governor’s attack on the prison, both of them getting back just in time to save Rick and help out with the walkers. Kat couldn’t help to think about how convenient was the situation and how it played out, but kept it to herself. Merle kidnapped her, Maggie and Glenn, Daryl had turned his back on Merle, Merle makes it in time to the prison to warn them about the walker bomb, Merle sneaks inside the prison. 

‘What are ya _doin’_?’

Kat raised her head as the room went silent, noticing the way Daryl frowned at her as she tried to tie up her shoelaces. Shifting her eyes from him and back at her feet, she found herself going all wide eyed, realizing she had been really _struggling_ to tie up those damn shoelaces. Her fingers froze for a few seconds, before she tucked the loose strings inside the boot, tightening the strap around them and brushing it off quickly. 

‘Nothing, I was just thinking.’ She bit down on the inside of her cheek, with Hershel’s words echoing inside her mind. _How and if she’ll recover._ It wasn’t the first time she had went through that type of damage, but she never found herself struggling with such trivial things. ‘Where’s everyone?’ 

‘Outside, gettin’ rid of them dead things. Why?’ Daryl bit down on his bottom lip, noticing the glint in them big green eyes way too late as she pushed past the white sheet and outside the cell.

‘I’m going to punch the hell out of your brother.’


	24. Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to write this chapter with the utmost seriousness, but somehow it dived into the smut's dark place. My baby girl Kat deverves a couple of orgasms after what she went through lmao
> 
> If anyone is curious, I uploaded a lame ass drabble of Kat, I ain't no artist but I'm pretty proud of how it turned out  
> Link here : https://imgur.com/lg0fFSE
> 
> As always, thank you for your support, guys! Love you all!~  
> Enjoy!

Tuning out the faint rustling around her, she went over how things went down the day before. Even though she had felt exhausted, somehow she found enough strength to leap down the stairs and try to get outside to hand Merle’s own ass to himself. As soon as she found herself basking in the orange light, the faint dizziness she had been sporting, hit her full on. Trying to brush it off and steady herself against the open door, her eyes narrowed, landing on Merle’s frame while he moved around a dead walker. She couldn’t remember how she got there, but the next thing she knew was her balled up fist connecting with his chin from bellow, in a weakened uppercut as she watched him stumble backwards and steadying himself against the fence. 

She heard Rick yell something, Daryl’s hoarse voice following suite, and in the next second the entire yard had flipped upside down, only after a few steady breaths had she realized that her body had been lifted off the ground, her ass up in the air, the back of Daryl’s shirt obscuring her vision as her body plopped onto his shoulder, manhandling her like he got a degree in denying them laws of physics. She didn’t even fight it, happy as a clam that she could see through with the promise she had made to herself as Daryl carried her back inside the prison, throwing a narrow eyed look at a fuming Merle, Rick’s Colt Python pointed at him. 

Kat stopped briefly from setting the silverware on the food tray, loosely holding the knife and fork in each hand while throwing a questioning look at Carol who had been giving her some suspicious side looks for the past ten minutes.

‘What?”

“Are you sure? I can do it myself.” Carol’s eyebrows shot up as she prepared the oatmeal with one hand, the other wrapped around a sleeping Judith. 

“Of course.” Kat scoffed, rolling her eyes as she dropped the silverware on the tray. “If we’re gonna live under the same roof, I might just act like I don’t want to break his neck.”

“Do you?”

“Debatable. He’s Daryl’s brother..” Kat trailed off as the idea was pretty clear, pressing her lips into a small pout as she prepared the meal, humming a random song that her brain decided to torture her with ever since she opened her eyes that morning. She threw one last look at the food tray as soon as she finished putting it all together, before lifting it off the table and pushed past Carol, making her way towards one specific cell. 

She listened to the rhythm of her footsteps, slightly aware of the second set echoing behind her, confidence oozing out of her small frame as she straightened her back and pushed her chin up even before the squinting pair of blue eyes focused on her, silently acknowledging the soon to be confrontation.

‘Guess you’re part of us now.” Thin eyebrow shot up, forcefully pushing at the fresh bandages wrapped tightly around her forehead as she dropped the tray on the small cabinet in his cell, before making herself comfortable on the chair next to it. 

“Here to punch me again, doll?” The smile on Merle’s face turned into a straight, thin line as soon as he saw that glint in them green eyes. He knew that look. “Look, ‘t was nothing perso-”

“What happened the other day.. Consider it a warm welcome. But I can do much worse. Don’t underestimate me, Merle.” She cut him off, his name rolling off her tongue in a threatening sneer, as she kept her voice low but sweet, easily keeping it in check.

“Excuse me?” His jaw clenched, a faint but well known soreness spreading through it while them words pushed through his teeth. His body tensed as he tried to stand his ground, watching her small frame shift on the chair.

“You tried to spit out that poor joke of an excuse, _it was nothing personal_. That’s what you wanted to say, right? Right.” She didn’t want an answer, making it clear as day as she continued talking. “You were blindly following orders. I can understand that, me of all people. And if you get a kick out of watching someone beat the crap out of me, well whatever floats your boat.” Kat sighed, crossing her legs, tilting her head so she could get a good look at his face as she leaned in closer until she could feel his breath getting stuck in his throat. “But, Merle, if you screw _this up_.. Mess with _Daryl.._ ” 

Merle watched how the most innocent of them smiles spread on her face from cheek to cheek, not entirely sure if the woman had a few screws loose or something, but in that moment he sure as hell knew what she was. The feeling of being cornered, threatened by a wild animal, the savageness they fought back with, while protecting what was theirs. The brutal yet beautiful way they did everything they had to in order to survive and keep what’s theirs. He was way too familiar with it. And he could see that there was nothing holding her back. That glint in her eyes was the most clear and pure intent to kill without anything such as a remorse darkening it. She was ruthless.

Her voice turned to a whisper as she pressed her palms together between them, her narrowed green eyes staring him down. “I’ll slit your throat while you sleep. Enjoy!”

Daryl had followed her, concern and curiosity getting the best of him. Propped against the metallic rail, he watched his brother showing off one of them faintest smirks, his eyes stuck on her frame as that murderous woman of his got up on her feet and moved those slender legs outside the cell. He sure as hell heard every last bit and as much as he loved the girl, sometimes he couldn’t help but mull over the twisted side of her and it was a fact that in instances like that one, she creeped the fuck out of him and now he got to see Merle going through the same thing. 

Turning around, Kat was met by her favorite pair of blue eyes, something she couldn’t recognize glazing them over, but nonetheless Daryl threw a short nod at her, keeping silent and still. She pressed her lips into a small smile, catching on the slight hint that he wanted to be alone with Merle.

“Take yer pills.”

God, the man could say anything and make it sound like he was threatening you when he mumbled like that and if she wouldn’t know better, she would have taken it just as that. Except for the fact that she did know him. Every inch of him. She cocked a cheeky eyebrow at him as she passed him by, raising her hand to her forehead in a mock salute while her smile turned into a full shit eating grin. “Sir, yes, sir.”

After a quick run to their cell for the said pills, Kat found herself back in the appointed eating area, helping here and there with whatever chores needed to be done, but shamelessly avoiding holding baby Judith. Each time she saw that little angel face, something inside her screamed. She was simply unable to do it.

The feeling of being watched crept up on her, snapping her head to the side only to be met by a pair of suspicious dark eyes. Apparently wounded, the sword chick was resting against the metal bars, silently watching her from afar. They hadn’t been properly introduced to one another. Daryl told her something about her helping them get into Woodbury, so basically the chick had a helping hand in getting her back.

“Gonna stare me down for the rest of the day?” Kat finished wiping the round table, throwing the dirty cloth on her left shoulder as she turned to face her. The stare was still there, but so was the silence. Kat folded her arms on her chest, nodding to herself. “Thanks. Heard you were the one to lead them there. I’m Kat.”

She managed to get a short nod from the woman, but making her talk was like pulling teeth and she was not in the mood for that. Kat rolled her eyes, pressing her lips into a defeated line as she turned around.

“Michonne.” 

Before anything else rolled off her tongue, Kat was left with her lips parted and her breath stuck in her throat at the sudden number of people flooding through the door, mostly at the bouncy blond ponytail. Andrea. She heard something about her being alive and kicking. In Woodbury. With the Governor.

Kat’s gaze followed the way Andrea went around, hugging Carol and the rest like they met over brunch on a lazy Sunday after church. She kept quiet and glued her ass to the table, watching Andrea’s hugs falter as soon as her eyes dropped on her. She didn’t hate the woman, no. It was more like a self-preservation feeling that crept up on her, her mind being horribly uncomfortable with hugging the woman that had let that psychopath of a predator lay hands on her, willingly. It didn’t feel right. 

Her back straightened at the warm feeling of a palm firmly pressed on the small of her back, relaxing into the touch as soon as she realized it was Daryl. 

“Lori didn't survive. Neither did T-Dog.”

Kat muscles tensed suddenly. _T-Dog was dead?_ Green eyes narrowed, searching the room for his face, the blood in her veins going freezing cold with each second she couldn’t lay her eyes on him. 

“He saved Carol?” It was a whisper, meant only for her ears to hear. Daryl felt the way her body tensed. Something was not right.

She turned her head to her right, acknowledging what Daryl said, but she didn’t feel comfortable enough to look him in the eye. Scrunching up her small freckled nose, Kat searched every corner of her mind. She was supposed to know. She had been at the prison at that time. How could she forget? “In the prison. Right.”

“He almost killed Michonne. And he would have killed us.” 

Kat turned her attention back to the group’s yelling contest, watching Rick as he put Andrea in a corner. It wasn’t her fault, but she associated herself with him, clinging desperately to whatever ray of hope she could see in that psychopath’s world of lies. 

Andrea felt cornered. She tried to blame Merle and on a certain degree, it was his fault indeed. He beat Glenn. He kidnapped the three of them. He was the one to put them in that hell hole. But even so, Andrea tried to be the voice of reason, trying to make both sides work things through. _Such a joke_. As if reading her thoughts, Daryl’s voice thundered behind her, making her flinch.

“Nothin’ to work out, ya hear me? He beat Kat into a coma. Yer fuckin’ boyfriend did, yeah. Maybe we should send him the same message, how’s that soundin’? What ya sayin’ is a damn joke, for fuck’s sake.” Daryl could feel them bubbles of rage bursting inside him as he took a step forward. The woman was nuts, coming with that stupid idea after what happened.

“Daryl.” Kat dug her fingers in his vest in a quick attempt to keep him away from getting any closer to Andrea. She knew he wouldn’t do anything stupid, but Andrea didn’t know that. As soon as Daryl took that step towards her, the blonde’s composed face dropped, a mix between fear and anger taking its place. 

Kat had more than enough of that struggle of a conversation. She tugged at Daryl’s arm, drawing his attention back to her, a pleading look on her face. Darkened blue eyes snapped at her, before that vicious glint in them faded away, leaving only that soft look he had been giving her ever since she woke up. “I’m done with this. Need to rest.” 

She watched him nod, throwing a quick look at Rick before he turned his back at the group, reaching out to help her off the table. Kat obliged happily, pushing her fingers through his in a tight hold, as she let him take the lead towards the cell. Their cell. 

Pushing away the sheet, she found herself feeling more exhausted than she thought she was. Kat went for a quick chug of cold water before throwing herself on the mattress, content at the way her cheek sank into the pillow. 

“Kat.” Daryl pushed her feet away, before he dropped next to her in a sitting position, his eyes glued on them small boots on her feet.

“Hm?” She opened one eye, silently studying him. He sounded concerned if anything and she had a hunch about what was on his mind. 

“Ya couldn’t remember ‘bout T-Dog.” It wasn’t a question, but a statement thrown out in the open, making it clear that he knew something was not right. “That’s normal?”

“More or less.” It wasn’t right to lie about it, even though the whole thing was temporary. She was sure of it. Kat shifted on the mattress as she pushed herself up, flushing her back against the wall while reaching out for his hand. “My brain’s like scrambled eggs. Some short term memories are blurred out.”

Daryl nodded, biting down on the inside of his bottom lip. The other day when he came back inside, he heard Hershel talk with her. He didn’t want to be one of them nasty eavesdroppers, but it just happened. He saw her struggling to tie them shoelaces too. Peaking at her from the corner of his eye, he couldn’t help question what else she couldn’t remember. “About us? Anything blurry?” 

Kat’s mouth hung open in slight shock. She pushed herself on her knees, quickly crawling to him, ignoring the dirt on her boots getting on the clean sheets. “Daryl, baby. No. Nothing.” She reached out to him, both her hands on each side of his face as she searched for any hint of concern left in his eyes. “Everything’s more than clear. Clearer than it had ever been.” She brushed the hair out of his eyes as she pulled him closer, an amused thought that he needed a haircut running in the back of her mind, before pressing her lips against his in a short kiss. 

“Good.” That was exactly what he needed to hear. With the slight relief washing over him, his muscles relaxed under her touch, watching them gentle small hands go up and down his arms, leaving a random pattern of goosebumps behind. “Thought I’d have to make ya remember them things.”

Kat’s eyebrow shot right up, a cocky smirk plastered on her face. “Shit. I may be needing that.” Furrowing her brows in fake confusion, she let her head back, her eyes locked on his. “Would you be nice enough to make me remember some of them things?”

“Yeah? What kinds of things?”

Kat couldn’t keep her face straight even if her life depended on it, flashing a toothy grin as soon as his arm snaked around her waist. “You know.” She moved her hand between them, her palm barely touching his chest and sliding down his belly, before stroking his clothed semi hard-on. “ _Things._ ”

“Could be more specific. Things like this?” 

His lips were on hers, and it wasn’t anything like the small, chaste peck from seconds before, it was hot and heavy, his teeth grazing her bottom lip as she wrapped her arms around his neck, forcing them both to fall on the mattress. 

“ _Мля-_ ” It was easy to forget the fragile state of her damn body with such a man in her bed. 

“What?” He sure as hell didn’t know what that meant precisely, but being around her for so long, he knew she was swearing and it most certainly wasn’t a good type of cursing, if the hissing wasn’t enough evidence already. 

She felt him pull away, hovering on top of her, hands roaming all over her body all concerned, as she scrunched up her bandaged nose. “Heavy kissing won’t do. We might break my nose more than it is already.” 

Daryl could feel the annoyance seeping through her words even if she tried to joke about it. But even so, watching her all flushed up under him, he couldn’t let that go to waste. Pulling away entirely, he wrapped one hand around her ankle, the other diligently pulling at the straps and shoelaces until both boots were thrown to the floor carelessly. 

“Heavy kissing won’t do? Depends on which lips I’m kissin’ tho. Strip.”

Kat felt like melting under his gaze and it was something about him being demanding and ruthless in bed, that was more than enough to make that sweet, sweet wetness pool between her thighs. Her hands practically flew on her waistband, tugging at the buttons and zipper as she bit down on her lower lip. 

And just like that, in the blink of an eye her pants were forgotten, wrinkled on the floor while her bare thighs trembled on his shoulders, fingers tugging mercilessly at his hair as her hips pushed forward, eager for more. The calloused hand on her hip tried to keep her still, failing miserably until she felt the sudden silent warning as his fingers dug in her skin, drawing a breathy moan out of her.

He felt her walls clench around his tongue, the wetness soaking his lips as soon as he grabbed her hip and as much as he tried to keep himself from being rough with her, he couldn’t help it when he could feel and hear her react so strongly. With a long stroke of his tongue, he tasted her again, before pushing two fingers inside of her, mesmerized by the way her pussy eagerly swallowed them over and over again, pumping inside of her in a steady rhythm. She was so sweet, so juicy, the taste of her was so gratifying, that as if it had a mind of its own, the hand on her hip pulled her closer to his face, burying his mouth in her delicious folds.

He flicked the small bundle of nerves with the tip of his tongue and the moan he drew out of her could have easily passed as music to his ears. He peaked at her from between her thighs and hell, he could have come in his pants just from that. The way her lips were parted, just enough for them lewd sounds to send sparks of electricity down his spine, the way she touched herself for him, them small fingers squeezing her right breast, the way her bedroom eyes looked down at him, all glazed over, hungry and desperate for release, the way her hips rolled all too needy against him. So hungry. So needy. So desperate. All just for him to see and feel. And he loved the hell out of it.

“Please-”

“Hm..” God, he loved the way she begged. He knew exactly what she wanted, but he didn’t feel like giving it away on a silver platter. He pulled away just enough to be able to see her face again, pushing another finger inside of her while he watched her eyes almost rolling at the back of her head, stroking her walls at the same pace. “Please what?”

“I need you. Ahh-“ The tip of his tongue brushed against her already swollen clit, making her back arch as she pushed against him desperately. “Inside me. Please.”

“Three fingers ain’t enough?” He loved to tease her and she knew it. She loved it too, even though he could clearly see the burning pink spreading on her cheeks and down her neck, so different from the way her skin flushed outside the bedroom.

“No. I need you inside me.”

“Can’t understand that.” His lips pressed into a sly smirk against her left thigh as he continued pumping inside of her, slowly unbuckling his belt. He knew she was close and he was even closer to hear them words come out that pouty mouth of hers.

“Daryl..” Kat couldn’t help the way she pleaded, her voice turning to a lustful mewl under his ministration. “I need your cock buried so deep inside me that I won’t even be able to remember my own name-” 

“Of course ya won’t.” He heard her whine as he pulled out his fingers, them curvy hips wriggling on the sheets in a desperate attempt to get closer. Oh he loved that. So damn much. He coated his already hard cock, the wetness dripping off his fingers mixing with the beads of precome as he grabbed her hip, lifting her off the bed, before sliding inside of her in an agonizingly slow stroke. “Ye’ll be screamin’ mine.”

Kat could have died like that. Impaled by his cock felt like fucking heaven, throwing her head back against the pillow as her insides twitched around him. She grabbed at the metal bars of the bed’s frame for the slightest support she could find, enough to slowly but steadily roll her hips, drawing a low grunt out of him and fuck, she loved that, it made her heart flutter and her insides tingle.

Both his hands were on her hips, fingers digging in her skin, applying more pressure with each thrust as she struggled to not fall over the edge yet, squeezing her walls around him on purpose, trying to get the slightest upper hand. But he caught onto it quickly, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips while he snapped his hips forcefully against hers, a hand sliding down her hip to squeeze that round ass of hers before slapping it a tad too hard, breaking the rhythm but just enough to make her lose herself. He felt her walls tighten around him. Another slap. Her thighs were flushed forcibly against the side of his hips.

“Babe, I’m-“

Another slap. 

“I kno’.” The grip on her hip tightened, his mind clouding with each spasm that threatened to push her over the edge and like a damn domino, pushing him as well. “Who ye’ll come for?”

“For you-“

“For who?” He could hardly keep from letting go, his hips moving on their own in a ruthless, out of synch way that made his mind go numb and he was more than sure that her thighs would be bruised for days after.

“Daryl. Daryl, yes, oh-“ Her mind went blank as the spasms washed over her entire being, running through every inch of her body. “-fuck yes, yes!” Like in a haze, she felt him twitch inside her, as she rode her high, rolling her hips to meet his, while her pussy swallowed eagerly every sweet drop of come he had.

Opening her eyes, she could see him panting heavily, hovering on top of her as his strokes went lazier and shallower, blue eyes glazed over and sunburnt cheeks flushed in way only she was allowed to see. Kat bit down on her lower lip, letting go of the metal bars and ignoring the soreness spreading through her fingers. Her fingertips slid on the sides of his neck in a gentle touch, neither of them being able to speak, both of them settling on gazing at each other as they tried to catch their breaths, and it was more than Kat could have ever asked for. He was everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments keep me fed in these dark times of quarantine! My better angel is shaming me for writing that, but it's the truth lol


End file.
